Clever Ways to Decline a Salon Service?

[Luscious Locks]

Hi, girls. This thread is inspired by Jamaicalovely's recent post about her incident with an SHS (Scissor Happy Stylist). My heart goes out to her and so many others here who've had that experience. I've been lucky enough to not meet a stylist like that, and I hope I never do.

So, I thought we should all brain storm for funny, clever, or snidely polite ways to refuse a salon service. Whether it be a new hairstyle, color service, relaxer, or the ever famous trim that ends up being a cut.

I don't have anything clever to add right now because knowing me I'd just get up smile and walk away, but I hope all of you who've been in this situation can add to the thread and make it pop off. I know the soft spoken members of the board will appreciate this.

Also, feel free to post your own horror stories here.

 

[soulie]

I take a little stack of the stylist's business cards before s/he begins to work. I explain that I will distribute the cards along with my opinion of the services performed - good or bad. I say it with a straight face, not laughing or joking at all. I am clear about what services I do and do not want performed. I do not assume that the stylist is a mind reader or a body language reader. If I make faces or look like I am in pain when s/he picks up scissors, I have not adequately communicated. I need to SAY "do not touch my hair with the scissors". If s/he insists I need a trim, I will say "we can consider that for my next visit; but not today".

We need to learn assertiveness when spending money at a salon. You wouldn't sit quietly and suffer while a painter paints your walls the wrong color, or while a cashier double-rings some groceries. The salon is no different: it is YOUR money being spent for services and you are entitled to receive exactly what you request.

 

[MAMATO]

I rarely go to stylists, because I think they are very expensive for things I can do myself at home. But when I go, I clearly say what I want first. But before leaving my house I do everything that I can do first. I would have taken the weave out first and detangle my hair because I am extremely tenderheaded and cheap at the same time. I know we pay for every single step of the process so one or two less is more money in my pocket.

Although I am very polite and quiet, people instinctively know that they should not mess with me, I wonder why So all my stylists experiences have been OK so far, they made sure to keep the communication going at every step. On the day of my wedding, the stylist asked me if I wanted her to trim me and give me a bang. She already got her scissors out, I could see them in the mirror. I politely and quietly told her 1)that I wont be paying for something my SO does for free at home 2) If I wanted a bang, I would have done it myself, aren't you expensive enough??? MEDITATIVE SILENCE. EYE COMMUNICATION. The scissors were back in her tray.

 

[LushLox]

^^^ ITA, we've got to be more assertive. I've not really had any negative experiences in a salon so I haven't got anything to add to the table in this respect.

I'm going to study my hair and learn about it until I am totally confident in carrying out all aspects of my hair care. When I do decide to go to a salon (as I'm sure that I will do just for an ocassional treat) I will ensure that the visit includes a consultation, where I will tell the stylist in very clear terms what I want and what I don't expect to happen.

If they start talking some crap about needing to cut my hair I'll just walk out, and keep walking until I can find a salon who can respect me and my wishes.

 

[soulie]

I forgot one thing: I always take a baseball cap with me to the salon - just in case I need to leave mid-service. I think some people stay through bad service thinking "I can't walk out of here wet/half-styled/etc. I can.

 

[BeautifulFlower]

Pretend you have a emergency, pay for services up till that point and run like he11....

 

[BrooklynSouth]

I forgot one thing: I always take a baseball cap with me to the salon - just in case I need to leave mid-service. I think some people stay through bad service thinking "I can't walk out of here wet/half-styled/etc. I can.

EXCELLENT!!!!!!!!! Straight forward, no nonsense.

 

[Solitude]

Tell them EVERYTHING you want upfront. One thing that used to happen to me is that I wanted my hair "done," but I wasn't completely sure what I wanted done to it, so I just listened to all of the stylist's suggestions.

Assess your own hair before you go. Check to see if you need a trim, deep conditioning, touch-up, whatever so that you feel confident when you sit down and explain what you want.

If your stylist is used to trimming you hair, say "no trim today."

 

[Supergirl]

I say "I do my own trims."

It's funny that I said this for 3 years to my last stylist, but she would still get the scissors out everytime as if she didn't remember the last time that I said "I do my own trims."

Once (not the stylist just mentioned but with another), I left mid-service. I was under the dryer with wet, tangled hair. During my consultation, we'd talked about detangling my hair and not balling it up in the bowl in the first freaking place. She put me under the dryer. I felt my hair--it felt a mess. I left.

I feel so FREE being a 100% DIYer now.

 

[madamdot]

Tell them EVERYTHING you want upfront. One thing that used to happen to me is that I wanted my hair "done," but I wasn't completely sure what I wanted done to it, so I just listened to all of the stylist's suggestions.

Assess your own hair before you go. Check to see if you need a trim, deep conditioning, touch-up, whatever so that you feel confident when you sit down and explain what you want.

If your stylist is used to trimming you hair, say "no trim today."

ITA! I tell them exactly what I want before they start and I have never had a stylist start cutting my hair without asking. NEVER! You grab for your scissors, I grab for my machete.

My first visit to a stylist is never a relaxer and if they balk at my new growth and tell me my ends are chewed up, when I know they are not, then I never see them again. I tell them I dont trim between relaxers. Most wont even ask.

 

[*Michelle*]

I've never gone to a stylist. But what's wrong with saying "No thank you"? I always appreciated and respected that.

 

[baddison]

Great thread!!! Absolutely needed!!!

 

[sxytia07]

this is such a good thread! i wish i was a 100% DIYer....

thinking about just going in for the relaxer only and doing the rest myself....

does anyone else do that?

 

[Dominican09]

In a Domincan Hair Salon....

Just be blunt and to the point, cut them off quick! And if she gets an attitude...give her attitude and she will be quickly replaced with someone more pleasant, IDP.

 

[msa]

I'm not funny, clever, or polite when it comes to my hair.

I make it clear what I want before I get there and when I step in the door. The first time something happens that I don't like, I just say no...with a serious attitude. The second time something happens that I don't like, I leave. I've left places with my hair half braided (because the braider was braiding too tight) and with conditioner in my hair because they were trying to detangle me with a fine tooth comb.

I've learned that if I paying someone to do something and they can't follow my directions then I'm not going to let them take advantage of me and I'm definitely not going to give them my money. I'm a grown woman and I can speak up about anything else, so I'm definitely not going to pay someone to jack my hair up and ruin my progress.

 

[baddison]

I'm not funny, clever, or polite when it comes to my hair.

I make it clear what I want before I get there and when I step in the door. The first time something happens that I don't like, I just say no...with a serious attitude. The second time something happens that I don't like, I leave. I've left places with my hair half braided (because the braider was braiding too tight) and with conditioner in my hair because they were trying to detangle me with a fine tooth comb.

I've learned that if I paying someone to do something and they can't follow my directions then I'm not going to let them take advantage of me and I'm definitely not going to give them my money. I'm a grown woman and I can speak up about anything else, so I'm definitely not going to pay someone to jack my hair up and ruin my progress.

love it.....love it.....totally agree!!

 

[lovenharmony]

I'm a DIYer, but when I used to go to the salon, I told them what services I wanted and made sure to tell them that I did not want any trims or cuts. I always wore a hat to the salon to be sure if I had to walk out that I would at least look decent.

 

[lilsparkle825]

I've never gone to a stylist. But what's wrong with saying "No thank you"? I always appreciated and respected that.

Tried that. Some people get pushy and repeatedly try to tell you what you NEED. Not "would you like a touchup/trim?" but "oh honey, you need a trim."

 

[JustKiya]

Clever ways?

What happened to saying No?

I really never understood those sort of incidents - how can you sit there and let someone do something to your head that you don't want, and then pay them for their work? The hell? Are you strapped down into the chair? Gagged? Out Cold?

Just. Say. No. Drop the thank you, if need be. Get the hell out of the chair, if need be. Get loud, if need be.

But please, none of us are children, and we have complete control over our bodies.

"But you need a trim."
"And I've said, already, I don't want a trim. How can I make this NO clearer for you? Would not leaving a tip make it clear?"

ISssshhht.

 

[msa]

Clever ways?

What happened to saying No?

I really never understood those sort of incidents - how can you sit there and let someone do something to your head that you don't want, and then pay them for their work? The hell? Are you strapped down into the chair? Gagged? Out Cold?

Just. Say. No. Drop the thank you, if need be. Get the hell out of the chair, if need be. Get loud, if need be.

But please, none of us are children, and we have complete control over our bodies.

"But you need a trim."
"And I've said, already, I don't want a trim. How can I make this NO clearer for you? Would not leaving a tip make it clear?"

ISssshhht.

at the bold.


I've said it before, some people act like they are blind, deaf, and dumb the moment their butt hits the chair.

 

[ladylibra]

I forgot one thing: I always take a baseball cap with me to the salon - just in case I need to leave mid-service. I think some people stay through bad service thinking "I can't walk out of here wet/half-styled/etc. I can.

shoot i have... half wet, half rollerset, half blowdried, half cut, half pressed, WHATEVER. i did not play! but like i've said before, i was spoiled by my auntie. if i couldn't fix it/finish it later, she was just a phone call and half-hour trip away.

 

[ladylibra]

Tried that. Some people get pushy and repeatedly try to tell you what you NEED. Not "would you like a touchup/trim?" but "oh honey, you need a trim."

as a former salesperson i will tell you, this is one of the oldest sales ploys in the book.

 

[Luscious Locks]

I take a little stack of the stylist's business cards before s/he begins to work. I explain that I will distribute the cards along with my opinion of the services performed - good or bad. I say it with a straight face, not laughing or joking at all. I am clear about what services I do and do not want performed. I do not assume that the stylist is a mind reader or a body language reader. If I make faces or look like I am in pain when s/he picks up scissors, I have not adequately communicated. I need to SAY "do not touch my hair with the scissors". If s/he insists I need a trim, I will say "we can consider that for my next visit; but not today".

We need to learn assertiveness when spending money at a salon. You wouldn't sit quietly and suffer while a painter paints your walls the wrong color, or while a cashier double-rings some groceries. The salon is no different: it is YOUR money being spent for services and you are entitled to receive exactly what you request.

Love this!

 

[Luscious Locks]

at the bold.


I've said it before, some people act like they are blind, deaf, and dumb the moment their butt hits the chair.

It's paralizing, I swear. The salon is a hypnotizing place.

I remember this one time now.
Some stylists are psycho. I mean, I went to this salon in which everyone said the place is fabulous and so are the stylists, except ____". I heard this for a year a half straight until that chick got fired and was never heard from again. She cut a lot of people's hair off--and I mean OFF! She did my hair once (this was when I was new to town and did not know about her), and she picked up the scissors turned around and offered me a trim with this crazy sparkle in her eyes (SCISSOR HAPPY!). I told her I never trim my hair and she said, "oh, i see" condesdendingly. She then put the scissors down. I was too innocent and carfree to pay her any mind, and my hair was APL--nobody could tell me anything about hair back then.

Thank God I escaped. But it's seems like now that I'm back on track with growth and the more I'm into this hair journey, the more I have to lose when i step into a salon. That's why I want us to know all the different ways to say no to the sicko stylists out there.

 

[Makenzie]

I'm new to the 'no trim' mentality'. I always got a trim every month because I was conditioned to believe my hair wouldn't curl or lay right if not. I was taking pretty decent care of my hair before this forum so it's not like I had fried ends etc..

So whenever I go to the salon and they say I need a trim I always say no but end up giving in because I'm scared my hair's not gonna look good or let me curl it later. I really need to work on this.

 

[msa]

Thank God I escaped. But it's seems like now that I'm back on track with growth and the more I'm into this hair journey, the more I have to lose when i step into a salon. That's why I want us to know all the different ways to say no to the sicko stylists out there.

The bold is exactly why I'm so clear about things. I have a lot to lose. I'm not about to let someone tear out my edges just because they want every single baby hair to be braided. And I'm definitely not letting anybody trim my hair; I have scissors and mirrors, I can do it myself.

The point is, there aren't different ways to say no. Everyone needs to be straightforward. Not, "I'll wait til next time" or "I'll do it myself" or "I like the way it looks already". Just say NO.

 

[soulie]

The bold is exactly why I'm so clear about things. I have a lot to lose. I'm not about to let someone tear out my edges just because they want every single baby hair to be braided. And I'm definitely not letting anybody trim my hair; I have scissors and mirrors, I can do it myself.

The point is, there aren't different ways to say no. Everyone needs to be straightforward. Not, "I'll wait til next time" or "I'll do it myself" or "I like the way it looks already". Just say NO.

I use the "next time" deferment to give the appearance of compromise; I'm still hoping to have a successful experience with the stylist and I don't want to have a continual battle the entire time I'm in the chair. Also, p*ssing off the stylist can be like making the cook mad. There are all sorts of ways for that person to get even. If I'm walking out of the shop mid-service, I don't care - because I won't be returning.

 

[IDareT'sHair]

Clever Ways to Decline A Salon Service: Just Say NO !

 

[jamaicalovely]

this is such a good thread! i wish i was a 100% DIYer....

thinking about just going in for the relaxer only and doing the rest myself....

does anyone else do that?

First, I wanna say your siggy pics was very inspiring to me Your Sept 08 pic is sort of my starting pic.


I love this thread. This should be a sticky. To the OP, thanks for using me as an example and starting this thread. I hope other ladies take the recommendations in this thread and learn from our experiences.

 

[hothair]

I start out CLEARLY stating out what I want done.

At every stage of the process ie about to shampoo I say what shampoo to use, DC I say which one, final rinse conditioner I hand over mine, combing I instruct from the tips (I take my own comb), if the person doesn't get it I collect the comb and do it myself.

I think once you're assertive AND clear, especially if they go away to work with someone else and come back you should be fine.