Been transitioning but thinking about relaxing....

Tonya

Tonya

New Member
I have been on this up and down roller coater for about a year now. I will decide to transition then I will give up and relax. I see alot of ladies here with beautiful relaxed hair. I think my hair is gorgeous when it is natural and pressed however I have had healthy relaxed hair as well. Especially now that I know how to care for it. Can soemone please shed some light on me? What are your reasons for transitioning and what are you gripes with relaxing your hair?
For those with relaxed hair...why do you relax your hair? I relax my hair because I liek wearing it straight more than wavy/kinky and I can always do braid out if I want it wavy. My one concern was thickness but if I stop using color treatments and stretch out the time between my relaxers I should still be able to have thick hair right? This thing is eating me up. May I have some help please?
 
I'm into my third pseudo-transitioning period. The first was for 3 months, the last for 6 months and I'm 2 months plus right now and won't get a touch up till May because I noticed that my fine textured hair is beginning to gain volume and is healthy.
I was tempted to do the big chop but my hair grows rather slowly and besides it is now healthy defeating the need to start all over
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Well,although I am not transitioning or anything like that, I just wanted to say I think you would look great either way you go.
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What are your reasons for transitioning and what are you gripes with relaxing your hair?

I decided to transition because I decided I wanted to get my hair back to its original healthy state, the way it was b4 bleaching, coloring, perming, spiking, etc.. I needed a clean slate. Plus, I decided it was time for a change, I've been relaxed since 15.(I'm 25 now)

For those with relaxed hair...why do you relax your hair?

The reason I relaxed previously bcuz it was all I knew until I found this board. It was like second nature every 6 weeks = retouch.

I'm with brittanynic16....don't leave us.....
 
Well I decided to transition because I think my hair is healthier and I retain more length when it is chemical free but at the same time. I don't have to put as much stress heatwise on my hair when i relax and with my hair so short...transitioning is not that easy without the help of hair pieces. I am going to try to hold on but I am really getting discouraged.
 
Re: Been transitioning but thinking about relaxing

Hi Tonya
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I had transitioned for over 1 year (while my hair was in braids), and I recently took my hair down.

I fussed for a few weeks with it natural, and I finally decided to relax. I relaxed my hair because it was really, really thick and very time consuming (to wash, condition, etc.) I looked through several photo albums on this forum to kinda see how the relaxed members cared-for and styled their hair.

I did notice that quite a few of the relaxed members were able to pull of their health/length goals - so viola, here I am, relaxed!!!

**As a side note, I did enjoy my natural hair, but it was a bit much for me. Additionally, my relaxer came out very nice at the roots and more textured at the ends (meaning it has more of a curly/natural pattern & can be straightened whenever I want it to be).

HTH!
 
I relax because I like to wear my hair straight the majority of the time. Don't get me wrong, I love my natural hair, but natural is not what I want to be right now. I actually tried transitioning last year, and handling the two different textures was too much for me. I do believe that there will be a point in my life when I will want to transition for real.
 
What are your reasons for transitioning and what are you gripes with relaxing your hair?
*I am transitioning because I like my own natural thick hair. Relaxers used to make my hair thinner.
*I hate chemicals and spending like $80 to put them on my scalp. (Note: the stylist uses rubber gloves to protect her hands but protects my scalp with ???)
*In trying to grow out my hair, I have been wearing protective styles. Why relax, if no one is really going to see the length?
*I also air dry a lot, so relaxers are really not for me.
*In my opinion, noting beats a straighthened natural head; the thickness is to die for.

Are you used to wearing your hair straight? You could press. I think that natural hair could withstand more heat but I am not sure.

Chichi
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[ QUOTE ]
For those with relaxed hair...why do you relax your hair? I relax my hair because I liek wearing it straight more than wavy/kinky and I can always do braid out if I want it wavy.

[/ QUOTE ]

Ditto.
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Plus I always have that manageability.
 
Read the quote above my siggy-it helped me with the toussling of the decision to either keep relaxing or go natural. It didn't sink in while I was relaxing that the beauticians used gloves while they were still applying the perm on my scalp,but when I read this quote,for some reason, it made perfect sense. Tonya,I did not know that this issue was getting to you like this-I would have been more supportive-sorry,okay? BTW,next week I need to to braid my hair,braid my hair...
 
Bublnbrnsuga,

I have a question regarding your reference to your signature.

The thing about the gloves: yes, it is a chemical they are working with, I didn't realize how many people seem to be unaware of the potency of this chemical. However, most people have their scalps based prior to having the chemical applied.

Secondly, the beautician may be applying several relaxer retouches or virgin relaxers throughout the day and should wear gloves due to the frequency their skin is coming into contact with chemicals.

I do not want to make this into a relaxed vs. natural thread it's just that this is the 2nd time today I have seen this pop up and I thought I'd shed a little light on it.
 
Re: Been transitioning but thinking about relaxing

It's ultimately a personal decision. I've been natural and I ended up relaxing/texturizing more so for convenience. Plus I had never had any problems with breakage, etc. while wearing a relaxer. For me, because my hair is pretty thick--natural was just way too much work and required more time than having permed hair. I initially went natural--transitioned for a year--because I wanted "wash and wear" hair--it was a big surprise to me that natural hair wasn't quite that simple. So now I'm sort of at an in-between state--I don't perm my hair that often (ever 12 weeks) and I don't perm it to be completely straight. So I I have texturized hair...

I have a photo album--though not just a hair album--but alot of pics showing my hair and the MANY things I do with it. The 3rd to the last pic in the album is my hair washed and air dried (with a few products of course)
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My Photo Album
 
[ QUOTE ]
PrettyBrownEyes said:
Bublnbrnsuga,

I have a question regarding your reference to your signature.

The thing about the gloves: yes, it is a chemical they are working with, I didn't realize how many people seem to be unaware of the potency of this chemical. However, most people have their scalps based prior to having the chemical applied.

Secondly, the beautician may be applying several relaxer retouches or virgin relaxers throughout the day and should wear gloves due to the frequency their skin is coming into contact with chemicals.

I do not want to make this into a relaxed vs. natural thread it's just that this is the 2nd time today I have seen this pop up and I thought I'd shed a little light on it.

[/ QUOTE ]

No problem-no offense here.
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I remember reading about the base used on the scalp before the perm and how a relaxer(depends on the chemicals)can break down the base that's supposed to protect the hair. I will find the article later,if you want. On top of that,my experience with the base was not good-I still got burned. I know there are other factors that could have contributed to the irritation of my scalp,but I had the notion that a good basing would eliminate or lessen the irritation.
 
Tonya,

I just saw your pics and you and your hair are very pretty. Like someone else said, I think you would look nice both ways.

I relax my hair, or the correct term might be "texturize" because I don't really alter the texture of my hair much. I smooth the relaxer with my (gloved) hands during the last few minutes of application instead of using a comb to pull it through like a lot of stylists do. For me, the purpose of relaxing is to reduce the bulky waviness of my hair. It's extremely thick, even with the relaxer.

I touch-up about three times a year and it only takes about 25 minutes, including prep and wash time. I don't apply it to my scalp - I start the application at about 1/8" away from my scalp and use a tint brush to apply. Because my hair is thick and I have a lot of newgrowth at touch-up time, I use the entire box of relaxer. Each box costs $5.99 so, at three boxes a year, I spend under $18 annually.

When I was young, my mother used to send me to salons to get my hair done and when I started getting relaxers they did a terrible job - sometimes pulling the relaxer through to the ends instead of just doing the newgrowth. This, along with the use of blowdryers and curling irons, caused a lot of split ends. I would walk into a salon with hair several inches below mid-back and the stylist would chop it off up to mid-back because of the split ends (so they said). They would also get the relaxer on my scalp sometimes.

I've been doing my own touch-ups for the over ten years and I like being in control of the application process. Along with airdrying and abandoning curling irons, doing my own touch-ups has nearly eliminated the split ends I used to have when I was younger. Once in a while a couple will appear, but it is nothing like it used to be.

So, I guess the point of my post is just to say that I think it's best to be in charge of your own relaxer if you do decide to go with that. Or, find an educated stylist you can trust.

Good luck with whichever choice you make.
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Re: Been transitioning but thinking about relaxing

[ QUOTE ]
model_chick717 said:
It's ultimately a personal decision. I've been natural and I ended up relaxing/texturizing more so for convenience. Plus I had never had any problems with breakage, etc. while wearing a relaxer. For me, because my hair is pretty thick--natural was just way too much work and required more time than having permed hair. I initially went natural--transitioned for a year--because I wanted "wash and wear" hair--it was a big surprise to me that natural hair wasn't quite that simple. So now I'm sort of at an in-between state--I don't perm my hair that often (ever 12 weeks) and I don't perm it to be completely straight. So I I have texturized hair...

I have a photo album--though not just a hair album--but alot of pics showing my hair and the MANY things I do with it. The 3rd to the last pic in the album is my hair washed and air dried (with a few products of course)
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My Photo Album

[/ QUOTE ]

Modelchick,you are a babydoll
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Re: Been transitioning but thinking about relaxing

I am transitioning because I love natural hair. It is beautiful and I don't want to hide it anymore. It is what I was born with and I want everyone to see who I am.
 
I will take al of this into consideration...

Bubbln, it is cool...IU been a bit "occupied" mentally lately anyways.(smile)
 
Re: Been transitioning but thinking about relaxing

I don't want to make this a natural vs. relaxer thread either. But, come on now, hair is hair. Yeah,it keeps our heads warm--but it has no REAL function. So basically it's here for our amusement, to do with it what we like. It's about what fits you/your lifestyle, and what makes you feel prettiest/good about yourself. I think finding the balance between those two things is the real struggle. Someone with a perm or texturizer is not showing any less of themselves than a person with natural hair. I mean, if a Caucasion woman gets a perm to make her hair curly and gets highlights, would we say that she's not really showing who SHE is? Just a thought.
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Re: Been transitioning but thinking about relaxing

I'm on the fence, myself.

I've been both natural and relaxed.

my relaxed hair is...
-thick
-healthy
-bouncy
-full
-no shedding (other than natural seasonal)
-no breakage

My natural hair was the same way, only the texture was different.

I relax because it decreases the bulk a little. It also allows me to style my hair faster. With relaxed hair, it didn't take so long for moisture to be absorbed.

Also, I have only experienced problems with relaxers twice. I had settled for a no-lye relaxer when the stylist didn't have the lye one. This was before I knew as much as I do about hair care.

Technically, my hair is texturized because on average, I only keep the relaxer on my hair for a minute and a half. And yes I do time the stylist!
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Re: Been transitioning but thinking about relaxing

Model chick your hair is gorgeous!!! And you are too. Do u model?
 
Re: Been transitioning but thinking about relaxing

Thanks Renee....

Maybe I will lightly relax...
 
Re: Been transitioning but thinking about relaxing

Thx Tonya--I have done a few things here and there--nothing major. I was looking at your pics--you have beautiful hair as well! I like the haircut. One of your pictures has a strawset--did you actually use straws or were they with the flexirods? thx, ma..
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Re: Been transitioning but thinking about relaxing

Thanks Mocel Chick. I used jherri curl rollers. I wore my hair like that when I was natural adn it looked like a shake and go when it fell.
 
What are your reasons for transitioning and what are you gripes with relaxing your hair?
----
Well I am (maybe) transitioning right now. I have no problems with relaxing my hair in theory, because even though I RARELY wear it straight (mostly cornrows and twists) I LOVE length and relaxing it shows the length more. I know naturals have ways to show more length like "banding" or blowing out before braiding but for me, I'm kinda lazy and I prefer relaxing every few months to having to band and/or blowout all the time. Besides that I wet my hair about 5 times a day so a blowout for length would only last a few hours.
I have super thick hair and it looks good relaxed, and I know hout to take care of it to keep the length...
BUT! Finding a good stylist is near impossible. The last one overlapped me and my hard-won length is snapping off every time I handle my hair. (I just gave myself a 1.5-2 inch cut a few days ago, we'll see how much that helped soon). If I am all natural I will no longer have to be afraid of careless, un-knowledgeable or just plain incompetent people ruining the hair I have so diligently grown.
That is my main reason for seriously considering this transitioning thing. Right now I am about at week 8. I will be going to week 12 anyway, we'll see what I finally end up doing. I am looking at two choices: learn to self-relax or go natural. I'm not sure I want to let another "professional" near my head with chemicals again.
 
Hey Tonya,

I feel the same way you do. I do love my curly texture but I thought my hair looked pretty good and healthy while it was relaxed.
The main reason why I transitioned was because I do love to color my hair. Now having relaxed hair makes this a little harder because you always have to think about the double processing but now that I'm on my way to natural hair I don't have to worry about this as much.
I can still blow dry my hair straight and wear the same looks. I was tempted not too long ago to relax my hair because I wanted some sideswept bangs but I decided against it, with some influence
smile.gif
.
 
Re: Been transitioning but thinking about relaxing

[ QUOTE ]
Tonya said:
I have been on this up and down roller coater for about a year now. I will decide to transition then I will give up and relax. I see alot of ladies here with beautiful relaxed hair. I think my hair is gorgeous when it is natural and pressed however I have had healthy relaxed hair as well. Especially now that I know how to care for it. Can soemone please shed some light on me? What are your reasons for transitioning and what are you gripes with relaxing your hair?
For those with relaxed hair...why do you relax your hair? I relax my hair because I liek wearing it straight more than wavy/kinky and I can always do braid out if I want it wavy. My one concern was thickness but if I stop using color treatments and stretch out the time between my relaxers I should still be able to have thick hair right? This thing is eating me up. May I have some help please?

[/ QUOTE ]

for me there was no choice...relaxers did NOTHING BUT damage my hair severely...there was no having healthy relaxed hair for me...so i rarely ended up on the fence with the decision , because i knew i really didnt have a choice. it takes a STRONG reason to go natural to stay that way. and its not like most of us didnt go back to relaxing only to start all over again (i did). you have to decide for yourself what your reasons are and what you can live with and whats important to you. its been ten years for me now being natural and im so so thankfull i did it. but i do believe if i could have had healthy relaxed hair, i would of kept relaxing it. but they NEVER worked for me no matter what i did. good luck on your decision. the only thing you have to do is, whats right for you.
 
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