Be careful what you pray for?

[Lady S]

I was in a conversation with two other women at work that sort of went like this. . .

Woman1 to Woman2: You've remembered not to keep praying for patience, right?
Woman2: Yes. It's hard because it wanted to roll off my tongue this morning, but I'm making an effort to not pray for it.
Me:
Woman1: I have a very wise aunt who noticed that I was going through a lot of tough stuff. She asked me if I was praying for patience, I said yes, and she told me to stop. By paying for patience, I had a lot of problems and stressful situations coming at me to force me to learn patience. Since I've stopped, things have calmed down.

What do you guys think? Is praying for strength or patience inviting stressful or tragic situations to happen? It doesn't seem right to me for a few reasons. The biggest is I don't remember any biblical passages to support this theory. Does anyone know of any to support it?

Another thing, if God wants you to be patient, does it matter if you pray for it or not?

Something else, is anyone's life truly easy and non-stressful all the time? Isn't it more about the way God gets you through it? After all, there will always be stressful jobs, loved ones passing away, heartache, etc.

My sincere apologies if this topic has already been touched. I've just never heard this theory.

 

[loolalooh]

I was in a conversation with two other women at work that sort of went like this. . .

Woman1 to Woman2: You've remembered not to keep praying for patience, right?
Woman2: Yes. It's hard because it wanted to roll off my tongue this morning, but I'm making an effort to not pray for it.
Me:
Woman1: I have a very wise aunt who noticed that I was going through a lot of tough stuff. She asked me if I was praying for patience, I said yes, and she told me to stop. By paying for patience, I had a lot of problems and stressful situations coming at me to force me to learn patience. Since I've stopped, things have calmed down.

What do you guys think? Is praying for strength or patience inviting stressful or tragic situations to happen? It doesn't seem right to me for a few reasons. The biggest is I don't remember any biblical passages to support this theory. Does anyone know of any to support it?

Another thing, if God wants you to be patient, does it matter if you pray for it or not?

Something else, is anyone's life truly easy and non-stressful all the time? Isn't it more about the way God gets you through it? After all, there will always be stressful jobs, loved ones passing away, heartache, etc.

My sincere apologies if this topic has already been touched. I've just never heard this theory.

LOL at the bolded. Okay, let me stop.

Okay, that is one instance in which He can grant someone patience - by sending trials to someone who desires patience. And yes, if God wants you to be patient, regardless of whether you pray for patience or not, He may send tests to develop that character. I think to James 1:

2 My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, 3 knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. 4 But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing.

Another possibility is someone praying for God to help him/her be patient and persevere through a current trial. I sometimes do this.

No, I don't believe anyone's life is truly easy ... at least not 24/7. Each one of us has our battles, ordeals, and trials. I believe (especially from James) that it is His desire that we all develop patience. Though things have "calmed down" for her momentarily, she may be missing out on learning that patience now as opposed to later or never. That's my take on it.

 

[loolalooh]

Additionally, I do think we should be careful of what we pray for (e.g., a job at company X, to marry Mr. Y, etc.). Particularly if we pray against His will or promise, we allow room for disappointment even if the prayer is granted.

 

[Supergirl]

I agree to an extent. We can pray for things thinking we're being all spiritual and holy and we really don't realize that we may not like the way that God answers those prayers. I am human enough to admit that I don't want to invite hardships into my life. They might come anyway, but I'm going to try not to ask for them! I have never prayed the "use me Lord" prayer.

 

[mrselle]

I know that by praying certain prayers we can leave the door open for trials and tribulations. I have a friend who used to pray for her faith to increase and shortly thereafter she would start going through trials and these trials would increase her faith. I've learned that the best prayer to pray is for God's perfect will to be done in my life and whatever His perfect will is He has already given me or will give me what I need to endure it. One of the most powerful prayers a person can pray is for God to show them themselves. Years ago I asked God to show me myself and it was one of the most humbly experiences of my life. I thought I was doing good because I was going to Bible Study twice a week, going to church on Sunday, praying these long powerful prayers everyday and night and surrounding myself with God centered people. God showed me that I wasn't all that and just because I did those things didn't mean there weren't areas that didn't need to be improved upon.

 

[Guitarhero]

They are not alone. Patience is a bad-*** teacher! It will leave you with some scars.

 

[aribell]

I do think that sometimes we can pray prayers that we don't really appreciate the meaning of. It's like when the mother of James and John asked that her sons sit at Jesus' side, and he answered: "You do not know what you are asking. Are you able to drink the cup that I am to drink?” They said they were, but neither was there when Jesus was accosted and turned over.

The dialogue in the op sounds a little superstitious, though. Pray for what is good to pray for. If we need patience and rough situations are what is needed to teach it, then we have to submit to the lesson.

 

[Lady S]

I do think that sometimes we can pray prayers that we don't really appreciate the meaning of. It's like when the mother of James and John asked that her sons sit at Jesus' side, and he answered: "You do not know what you are asking. Are you able to drink the cup that I am to drink?” They said they were, but neither was there when Jesus was accosted and turned over.

The dialogue in the op sounds a little superstitious, though. Pray for what is good to pray for. If we need patience and rough situations are what is needed to teach it, then we have to submit to the lesson.

I think that's what was going through my mind. That and it being very exhausting to try to figure out what to say when you pray. Will praying for impatience make less drama happen?

 

[Jynlnd13]

I read this section a lot, and this is my first post to this section. Personally, I don't know how to answer your question OP. I guess it depends on the person, I am one of those "use me Lord" people. I ask him to use me, how every he'd like, and I ask him to help me touch someone today, and share him with them. I've have numerous people say to me that I've opened there eyes to something, thanking me for opening their eyes to something else. I wouldn't have been able to do that unless God had led me to the information, etc. I needed to know. I think I just went a little off topic? Sorry :/

 

[nathansgirl1908]

I have had SEVERAL people tell me not to pray for patience. I don't. And the reasons given were exactly the ones you heard from those women.

 

[Laela]

Well, woman #1's aunt is indeed wise... she must know and understand that Patience (or long suffering) is part of Fruit of the Spirit, a gift. Why ask for something God has already given us, through the Holy Spirit? It shows a lack of Trust/belief in God asking for something He already gave us.

Galatians 5:22
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness.

It's up to us to study God's Word and apply it to our lives so that the ninefold Fruit of the Spirit develops in our daily lives. This is exercising our Faith. Understanding that will alleviate a lot of unnecessary worry and heartache when we pray. It's also through Wisdom - a deep understanding from through/being tested and tried, that patience develops to the point that nothing can so easily offend us.

Proverbs 19:11
A man's wisdom gives him patience; it is to his glory to overlook an offense.



As for praying for what we don't already have:
I also will note that we have the Blood-bought right to ask Our Father for ANYTHING, in His name. It's not being 'over spiritual' but being confident in our Covenant with God, through Jesus, to ask. Patience is being happy while we wait. And Waiting on God is serving Him, while we 'wait'.
God may not answer how we want/expect Him to, and that's where we need that understanding - so we don't get frustrated with Him. This is what trusting God is all about. He knows what we want, but we must ask.

In John 15:7, Jesus said:
If ye abide in me, and my words abide in you, ye shall ask what ye will, and it shall be done unto you.

The key is to be in God's will.


One more Scripture, to make it plain that when must not worry -- at all - about anything. There will be days of trials/testing that may try to off-end you, but when you see things differently -- even a 'bad day' is a good day, because of the Comforter that abides in you. It may sounds crazy, but being anxious and frustrated are signs we won't trust God to take care of us (I've been guilty of this myself and I've learned to put that type of thought captive with Scripture). This one always reminds me that I don't need to fret, My Father's got this.

Matthew 6:
25 "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes?
26 Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?
27 Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life[b]?
28"And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin.
29 Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these.
30 If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith?
31 So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?'
32 For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them.
33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.
34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

As that old Cliche' goes... Don't Worry, Be Happy (in Jesus) ... and nothing and no one will shake your Faith in Him. It also helps TREMENDOUSLY to be in constant contact with people who are able to always encourage you in the Word. What you pay attention to will expand, read the Word daily... those Words will jump from the pages, right into your heart and stay there.

HTH!

Woman1: I have a very wise aunt who noticed that I was going through a lot of tough stuff. She asked me if I was praying for patience, I said yes, and she told me to stop. By paying for patience, I had a lot of problems and stressful situations coming at me to force me to learn patience. Since I've stopped, things have calmed down.

What do you guys think? Is praying for strength or patience inviting stressful or tragic situations to happen? It doesn't seem right to me for a few reasons. The biggest is I don't remember any biblical passages to support this theory. Does anyone know of any to support it?

Another thing, if God wants you to be patient, does it matter if you pray for it or not?

Something else, is anyone's life truly easy and non-stressful all the time? Isn't it more about the way God gets you through it? After all, there will always be stressful jobs, loved ones passing away, heartache, etc.

My sincere apologies if this topic has already been touched. I've just never heard this theory.

 

[Prudent1]

I've learned that the best prayer to pray is for God's perfect will to be done in my life and whatever His perfect will is He has already given me or will give me what I need to endure it. One of the most powerful prayers a person can pray is for God to show them themselves.

Amen! It is funny how many ppl pray to God for things not realizing that tests and serious cases of the moanies come before promotions and before testimonies. You have the option of deciding how deep you will go on your journey with God. No one alive will fail any tests he gives but we can become like a gerbils on those exercise wheels in a spiritual sense. We could still be saved. We just wouldn't experience victory in certain areas or fullness of joy.

I think that's what was going through my mind. That and it being very exhausting to try to figure out what to say when you pray. Will praying for impatience make less drama happen?

Not at all.... Like Longfellow said, "In every life some rain must fall." Solomon also said, in Ecc 3:1 "There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under heaven" Drama cometh, how you deal with it and if you will have the correct weapons in your repertoire is up to you.
Great questions!