BAD DAY... Does anyone else every feel like this?

[Owest]

Today I decided I wanted a cute curly rollerwrap, since it was wash day and it had been like a week since my last wash..BIG MISTAKE #1...My hair had been behaving this week, and looked pretty good. I should have just left my hair alone. I started by doing a conditoning wash. First I did an ACV rinse, and followed it by saturating my real hair and the weave with Lustrasilk's Aloe Vera Cholestrol(for protein). I left it in while I soaped up in the shower(about 5 minutes), then I used Suave M&H. Afterwards I used my leave-in and Surged. I started to detangle the hair and that's when I noticed it. Half of my tracks (I'm wearing a weave this summer) were coming a loose. Foolishly, I figured "no big deal" and started setting my hair...BIG MISTAKE #2...I couldn't even get the rollers to roll all the way to my scalp, they were sooo loose. There were rollers sliding out of my hair, and my face was all sticky from my setting lotion saturated hair touching my face. Finally I got all the rollers to stay by tying them with a sating scarf. Needless to say the whole rollerset was SLOPPY and looked TERRIBLE, but something inside me told me to keep going...BIG MISTAKE #3...I should have just taken out all the rollers and did something else to my hair. After six hours of airdrying, I was fustrated and hot from wearing that big ass scarf all day, so I took it off and decided to check to see how the curls were coming. I went to my mirror and took the only dry roller a loose...to my dismay the weave had dried okay but my real hair was wavy/krinkly and completely seperate from the weave. By that time I was pretty annoyed so I decided to sit under the dryer. I figured that maybe the heat would blend the hair and speed up the process. After sitting under the dryer for about an hour I was aggravated and snappy, I'd had all the heat I could take, so I went again to check on the status of my hair. It was about 75% dry but it had dried the same way it did when I was airdrying it. I think it was because of how sloppily my hair was rolled. Anyway I decided to just blowdry and flat iron my hair straight..BIG MISTAKE #4... I started to blowdry and OUCH, I kept hitting the loose tracks (the tracks had become even looser from me tugging and pulling to keep the rollers in place). It was apparent that the tracks were way too loose to effectively style my hair, so I ended up having to completely redo 3 entire tracks over. IT WAS A PAIN IN THE ASS TO DO. After I finally completed that task, I started the blowdrying and the flat ironing...BIG MISTAKE #5...when I was done and all wrapped up, I realized I had forgotten to use a heat protectant. I'm wondering now.."Exactly how much damage did I just do to my hair??" When I was combing there was tons of hair coming out and I had a lot of tangling from the sloppy rollerset, however I'm not sure if a majority of it was weave or my real hair (I know it was a combination of both). I hope a majority of it was the weave, but only time will tell.

Anyway today my mother brought this to my attention:
I am always touching, washing, moisturizing or restyling my hair. I was thinking about this, and she is RIGHT. I'm always either doing or buying something for my hair. I am HAIR-OBSESSED. I thought by paying more attention to my hair I was helping it, but now I think I maybe hurting it. It does seem as though I am always having to re-style it. Before I started this whole haircare thing, my rollerwraps would last about 2-3 weeks, with MINIMAL maintence (just wrapping it and unwrapping it). I wonder if I am actually HELPING my hair? It seems as if I have been having a lot more bad days then good ones. Does anyone else feel like this??

 

[JenniferMD]

I know what you're saying and I think the key is that you SHOULD be paying more attention to your hair but that doesn't mean doing more TO your hair. There's a big difference there, and if you're doing a lot more to your hair than before than you can actually be hindering instead of helping your hair. Instead of equating attention to your hair with always doing your hair, think of attention as listening to your hair. When it's dry...wash it; if you are noticing access shedding....try wearing more protective styles or doing a protein treatment; if your hair feels dry but you recently washed it....try adding a moisturizer.

A lot of women here will tell you that as little manipulation as possible is best for your hair and I agree. I hope you feel better.

 

[Poohbear]

Yeah it does sound like u manipulated your hair alot which can really hinder your hair from looking its best than helping it.

But I've had bad hair days as well, especially when I tried stretching my relaxer for the first time. My roots were thicker than my ends. Sometimes rollersets wouldnt turn out right or would only last one day. To solve the problem, I found a protective style (two french braids) that helped me cope with stretching my touchup. I relaxed today and my hair looks better now and can be styled easier.

 

[Owest]

Thanx guys...it's just so frustrating and difficult to get a hairstyle that actually looks good and is not damaging

. I'm having the same problems you did Pooh, my sets are messing up really fast as opposed to when they lasted 2-3 weeks at a time. I'm having a really hard time adjusting to having to wear the same style everyday (a bun or ponytail). Since my hair is short/medium length I got a weave to help me get through the summer.

But it seems like ever since I got the weave I've been having to do twice as much to my hair ie. keeping both my hair and the weave moisturized, washing it, styling it etc. Today as I was brushing it back into a bun I was wondering how much of my hair I was breaking off, just from brushing over top of the braids. I'm probably bald underneath. HAIRCARE SUX

!!! I feel giving up, my hair has always been the same length and probably always will be.

 

[CheerHHS]

Your preaching to the choir! I'm 9 weeks post relaxer, for some reason I haven't been detangling properly for the last 8 weeks *STUPID*. So basically ALL the hair that should have naturally shed ended up fused in my other hair. After not being able to get a comb throught it anywhere I decided that it was time to go ahead and detangle. After 2 and half hours, an entire bottle of VO5, a bunch of breakage, and 3 handfuls of hair I was mad to say the least. Thank goodness it didn't really affect the overall thickness or length of my hair. Moral of the story DETANGLE no matter how much of a hassle it might prove to be. Your hair and scalp will thank you later.

 

[Owest]

I hear you Cheer, I'm thinking about taking out the tracks tommorrow

 

[CheerBear]

Ha! This new haircut experience will be a perpetual bad hair to me until it grows out and I can deal with it...my hair is underprocessed totally throught which causes it to be very very frizzy, especially since it's humid, and because of stress my hair is looking dry and crazy..so I feel your pain....Anyhow, don't be discouraged, you CAN and WILL grow your hair, just be patient, you're learning alot of great things from the board and they will pay off in the end. I like you, had this problem when I first became a board member, I would want to do and try everything that the other women raved about and for a while, my hair was JACKED THE HELL UP, but...through trial and error, you will find what works for you, but not too many trials ok, your hair needs a break...too much change isnt good. Also, I know you wanna be cute all the time, but where has "being cute" gotten alot of black women when it comes to hair....nowhere real quick....to the wig store...etc, etc...

 

[Owest]

[ QUOTE ]
CheerBear said:
where has "being cute" gotten alot of black women when it comes to hair....nowhere real quick....to the wig store...etc, etc...

[/ QUOTE ]

So So So True....you are hilarious Cheer. Hopefully all this fustration I've been feeling today will be gone tommorrow when I wake up.

 

[Teshila]

I am sorry for your troubles, O. Just hang in there. The tracks are supposed to make it easier. When they dont, then it might be time for them to come out so that you can have an easier time with your own hair. Good luck and feel better, girl.

 

[Owest]

Yeah that's the irony. Ever since I started taking care of my hair, it has become more and more unmanageable. My real hair styles will not last more than a few days. The weave on the other hand will hold styles fine, but I think I am not taking care of it properly. I am so consicous now of my real hair breaking off that sometimes I just get so fustrated. Ironically my mother who is less than enthustiastic about this board and my new hair regimen, suggested "that I look on here for tips on weave care, since this board has tips on everything else" LOL. Which I did...I think now that I have found help for taking care of the weave, I will feel much better.