StarScream35
Well-Known Member
What is your take?
I'm wondering though if they really are necessary to an extent. I remember with one of my past relationships I had to apply a little bit mind game pressure cause he started acting up. People say you shouldn't make yourself too available to men and with this guy. I really learned what that meant. First and foremost, he and I actually discussed how we both hated mind games and didn't want that in our relationship YET I found when I was too available to him he took me for granted so I HAD to play mind games with him in order to get him to act right. For example, not answering his calls, breaking dates. It got really crazy but was really sad. We eventually broke up.
I don't think so... I am way too neurotic to allow someone to mess with my head. If there is a problem, it needs to be expressed so the situation can be resolved one way or the other. If a couple has to resort to playing games to get what they want/need then its time to re-evaluate the relationship.
However, I do believe in natural consequences to human behavior. Example, he does not appear to have time for me, then I will stop trying to make plans and find other things to do.
Cichelle said:Subtle manipulations abound within a lot of relationships. People want and need certain things and they figure out along the way how to at least try to get them. It's pretty normal within the range of human behavior.
I have a couple of friends who have admitted flat out that they used "mind games" to get their now husbands to marry them. They are both happy and have kids and their husbands seem happy too. I guess it worked out okay for them.
Yeah, mind games are borderline abusive. I get why people do it, though.