Advice please!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I don't have any wise wisdom but that inner voice will not go away if it's been around that long.
 
Yes. I have been in that situation and I broke it off when I realized it wasn't fair to either of us.

Some things you might consider:

Never mind for a moment if he is a "nice guy". Were you ever attracted to this man? When you say: I really wasn't hoping for a relationship with this person at the time, but he was so nice and sweet that I ended up being in a relationship with them. —It doesn't bode well. Are you attracted to him physically? Do you want intimacy with him on all levels? Or do you sometimes feel resentful or even almost disgusted by him when it comes to intimate concerns? No need to answer these questions here. But to use a trite phrase, is it possible that you are just not into him?

Lastly, Do you think it's right to stay with someone against your persistant "inner voice" and regrets, just so you won't be alone?

I can't tell you what to do. I'm not sure exactly what the problem is. If you can start to pinpoint why you are feeling the way you do, you might be able to come up with a solution. However if you simply aren't attracted to him, if there is no there there (sorry Gertrude Stein) and it hasn't gotten there in 3.5 years...it's highly unlikely that it ever will.
 
OP, Are you not even going to take the time to thank the people who responded to your thread? You're just going to delete your posts and KiM?
 
hopeful said:
OP, Are you not even going to take the time to thank the people who responded to your thread? You're just going to delete your posts and KiM?
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:lachen::lachen:

I didn't even get to read the thread. Some people see us as free therapists
 
Briefly:

She's been going out with a man for about 3.5 years. According to her, she wasn't looking to get in a relationship with this man, but he was such a nice guy she kind of just ended up in one. She has nagging thoughts—or rather, her inner voice says—this is not the guy or relationship for her and sometimes wishes she would have made a different choice at the age of 22. She is worried about starting over at 25 years old or possibly ending up alone/not being able to find the right person. She doesn't know if she should listen to her inner voice or if it is guiding her in the wrong direction.
 
hopeful said:
OP, Are you not even going to take the time to thank the people who responded to your thread? You're just going to delete your posts and KiM?
Click to expand...

My bad...not too many people had responded so i guess i figured no one else was going to really respond so thats why i had deleted it. But yea, Cichelle summed it up my story in the prior post.

I guess i didn't even realize that that was inconsiderate. I feel bad. Thank you for those of you who have given me advice in this thread.
 
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OP, at you must learn trust or be in tune with your inner voice. Part of your maturation process is learning to do this.

List the pros and cons out in Black&White and see which one there's more of. This may also help you as you approach other relationships.

I'm pert near 2x your age; DO NOT believe that you must make lifetime decisions at your age.
 
Listen to your inner voice. Don't let fear get in the way of that. You don't want to end up stuck with someone you don't really want to be with.
 
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