A Long Time Coming...I Finally Relaxed it

[Suri]

Hey guys what's up...welll i did it. I had been going back and forth for months almost half of the year comtemplating whether or not I should relax my hair.
I was natural with about 1/2 of relaxed hair left. I was braiding as an alternative to sitting and watching, some of you remember. Well, shortly before the summer I took my braids out hoping to enjoy my natural hair, which I did for the most part. Then the mid-summer came and I had been wearing the same headcrushing pony tail ALL summer.
I tried to blow it out twice that was much like a cat being electrocuted. I was so frustrated with constantly spending so much time on my hair. I was preparing to start school, also have a 5 year old, I just did not have the time, patience, moreover, i did not want to do it anymore. So shortly after school started, I got a relaxer. Something odd happened during the process. I was very nervous before getting it done and even started to tear up. Despite that weirdness, I am happy i did it, but I am mad I spent all that time in a place i was unsure of. I think I did more damage to my hair during that transition/natural phase because now i feel like i have a lot of questions about hair that I've had all my life.

I feel like she may have over processed my hair, but at the same time I realize that some of my natural hair was different lengths and I used to brush my hair a lot it's so hard to explain ever detail but I am glad that mess is over.

I just need to get a super trim and start fresh, cause my ends are ok, but not friendly right now, 1/2-3/4 in. may have to go ASAP.
Just wanted to share that. Thx for listening
suri

 

[winterinatl]

Thanks for sharing.
I am always tempted to go natural every time I am ready to touch up. I think to myself "I like my waves in my new growth". But then, I think about the fact that I like my hair to be mostly straight, not bone straight, but straight enough for my buns to style me hair for me. I also think about the short amount of time I need to style when washing after workouts and such.

It's a pain now. I couldn't imagine this length in my natural hair.

 

[cmw45]

I hope you feel better about your decision and have more fun on your journey. If you ever decide you want to go natural again...you will. In your own good time. Best of Luck. --C

 

[sareca]

Congrats I don't like being in decision limbo either.

 

[Cooyah]

congrats!!!!! glad you are happy with your decision, but errah where the pics

 

[determined_to_grow]

Thank you for sharing your experience. I too am in limbo and ALL of the things you experience- I'm going through (and I'm only 9 weeks post).

 

[Suri]

Thanks for the kind words. I would not do it again because I could have kept my hair relaxed and had twice the length and been keeping it healthy, instead I had no idea what was going on under there plus I was distracting myself with braids, using countless products trying to "find" which one was best for me. I think back to all the hair products, UGH never again. It was like a damn chem lab in my bathroom.
I will whip my hair back into shape in no time. That's my mission. I will get some pics of my hair asap, I have pics showing my hair, but you can really see what you need to.

suri

 

[Suri]

I am always tempted to go natural every time I am ready to touch up. I think to myself "I like my waves in my new growth".

This is how I got started. lol this was is for me, I kept thinking I love my new growth well imagine that new all over, dry and first thing in the morning and just not the hair you are used to. Good thinking chica!

I also think about the short amount of time I need to style when washing after workouts and such.

That's another prob. I workout daily, and I can't be bothered styling for a long time afterwards. Quick question for you, do you always wash your hair everytime you sweat. I feel like it's bad to have sweat in your hair without at least rinsing it. thx.

 

[Suri]

Thank you for sharing your experience. I too am in limbo and ALL of the things you experience- I'm going through (and I'm only 9 weeks post).

I wish you the best, I think deep down I wanted to relax but I was trying to stick it out to 'experience' the whole thing.
One thing I can say is that transitioning, unless you are very methodical, can be frustrating. If you are going to go natural, just do it. Cut the hair and be natural. That transition was a doozie and definitely drove me crazy. GL to you

suri

 

[winterinatl]

This is how I got started. lol this was is for me, I kept thinking I love my new growth well imagine that new all over, dry and first thing in the morning and just not the hair you are used to. Good thinking chica!



That's another prob. I workout daily, and I can't be bothered styling for a long time afterwards. Quick question for you, do you always wash your hair everytime you sweat. I feel like it's bad to have sweat in your hair without at least rinsing it. thx.

Not every time. I havne't been in the gym 'every day' in months and months, but generally I would: Day 1 w/cardio, shampoo, Day 2 w/ weights, no wash, Day 3 cardio/legs, C/o wash, Day 4 cardio, maybe c/o, maybe not...next day shampoo.

When my hair was really saturated w/sweat and I knew i wouldn't be back in the gym for another day or two (consequently giving me no automatic reason to wash) I would do a c/o wash. I will leave sweat in my hair for a day. It's just wet all of the time.

 

[Candy_C]

Yeh sweat is real bad...when i'm out raving (one of my only forms of exercise) my head sweats out real bad so i HAVE to wash y hair the nxt day...i think shampooing it out is better, but obvousely shampooing everday is detrimental to hair health, so i think i good oiling up with an ayurvedic oil (asian oils, known for cleansing) and rinsing out with water for ages and then co-ing would be best for ya.

 

[determined_to_grow]

Hmm good point (bolded). I am debating b/w texlaxing (very similar to Isis' method) and going natural- I know for a fact two things: 1- I don't look cute with short hair (I had my hair short twice in my life and NEVER again. 2- I don't look good with super straight hair (as it is in fotki pics when I first started my hair journey)- my head and face is shaped very weird and there is a certain amount of volume and length I need to pull it off!. So with that I can't do the BC until my hair is another 5 inches (atleast). I think I'm going to stick it out for a 6 months before I make a decision- so far so good. I know the first two months are easier to get through but if I can't do it anymore - I WILL DEFINITELY PERM it and not try go crazy over it!

I wish you the best, I think deep down I wanted to relax but I was trying to stick it out to 'experience' the whole thing.
One thing I can say is that transitioning, unless you are very methodical, can be frustrating. If you are going to go natural, just do it. Cut the hair and be natural. That transition was a doozie and definitely drove me crazy. GL to you

suri

 

[Divine Inspiration]

Suri...you are an inspiration. You remind me exactly of where I am. I wholeheartedly wanted to transition, but I simply can't right now. My transitioning hair requires mega maintenance, and I don't have the time or patience to deal with it right now. My career is blossoming, school is kicking into gear, my life is flourishing, and I'm too busy to fight with these textures. This past year has been more trying than the year before dealing with the two textures and making styling decisions. I work out every other day, and styling was out of the question. I was going months with my bun, and I didn't like it.

I've recently decided that I need to remain relaxed...until I have more time and attention, and until I'm ready to CHOP my hair because a long transition is NOT for me. This is my second attempt at it, and I've learned that when I transition, I'm going to have to chop at about 7 months post...after that, it's tangles, matting, and time-consuming styling that I have NO desire to deal with. I got my hair flat ironed a couple of days ago just to be sure that straight hair was what I wanted, and I was right so I'll be relaxing in a few weeks. I'm a no-fuss kind of lady...no time for a long, elaborate regimen.

Excuse my little vent...I can just totally relate to everything you said and the way you feel. Anyway, congrats on being sure of what you want and being strong enough to acknowledge what's right for you and what isn't.

Happy Hair Growing!

{DI}

 

[InJesusName]

Congrats on your decision. I'm glad you are enjoying your new hair. I too have been where you were. I had totally decided to transition, and even went through a 6 month stretch...at the end of the stretch I got tree braids with micros around my damaged edges...BAD MOVE!!!! When I took them out I was like . Seeing the "real" texture of my hair made me change my mind REAL quick... Unfortunately, I had someone "texlax" my hair and she did a HORRIBLE job. I am now in that "in between" stage of three textures of hair...texlaxed-underprocessed-straight which is really frustrating, but I now know that the natural thing is not for me. I am going to try this texlax thing again in a few weeks (after much more research on stylists...) and give you results. I know that once I get a "good" relaxer on my hair it will flourish as well. HHG!!

 

[Ayeshia]

Exactly why I didnt either bother transitioning..it was either BC or transition for so and so amount of monhths and relax....I really wanted natural hair so I just took a chance lol.