A 3 yr Old's Toddler's Scalp is Based, the Relaxer is mixed, What Would You Do?

[Firstborn2]

Lawd I don't think i would have to deal with this type of issue in my family. For the most part we are natural textured folks. The ones who aren't had to wait until the age of 18 before they could relax. Funny thing is, it's just an unwritten rule throughout my entire family.

 

[Bene]

To be honest, I don't think I would do or say much. As many reservations I may have about the practice, it all boils down to the fact that it's not my child and I have no right to step in and tell someone what to do with their kid's hair. If the opportunity presented itself where someone asked my advice BEFORE they did it, I'd have plenty to say. But at the time that it's happening, the parent has already made the choice.

 

[Heavenly]

If I did not know the person at that moment, I would make up all sorts of weird things like relaxer makes kids infertile, stupid... etc.

I would then try to pry the relaxer out of the person's hand.

I would ask to do the child's hair myself and show that a relaxer is not needed.

I would then make a friend.

If I knew the person, I would simply take the relaxer, throw it in the trashcan, give person one mighty dirty look and say, "Don't be ignorant, you simpleton from space."

And then I would proceed to wash said child's hair.

 

[Truth]

Taking from my "15-things I want to say outloud- Hair edition"

"U betta not relax dat baby's head. Head full of pretty curls and You wanna relax it... I should get out this chair and beat you... "

except if it's family, I would actually say it.. Yeah she's not my child.. that's nice... u betta not put an ounce of anybodies hydroxide on dat hair.. Fortunately, it's only really me and my sister and my bestfriend.. my bestfriends child is by far gonna be between the 2-3 range.. and my sister already know better..Auntie Che dont play!

 

[asummertyme]

There would be no words as to what I would do If I caught sombody ..and i dont care who it is!! putting a relaxer in my childs head.???!!!..nah...just no words...I can feel the anger rising just thinking about the scenerio! whooosaaa!

 

[Aisling~Siahbon]

Cuss sombody out! Then start screaming at them about reading product labes and putting carcinogenic chemicals in a baby's head that is not completly developed. Then start ranting about passing on low self esteem and and self hate in the black community elluding to the experiment done by Dr. Kenneth Clark. Then carry on a long discusiion about slaves and "good hair". All to the tune of Dr. King's "I have a Dream"...They would throw the relaxer in the trash.. just to get me to shut up!

 

[Ladybelle]

I had a friend who's ds (age 3 at the time) had a beautiful, healthy grade of hair and she just didn't feel like being bothered with the task of weekly/biweekly shampoo, conditioning, detangling, etc..... so when she called me and asked me about putting a perm in, I gave her all of the details- how most children's hair follicles/strands are not even fully developed before the age of 13, so perming before that time can be really detrimental to hair health.

Even with that, she still wanted to put a perm in this babies hair- not wanting to see her ruin this lil' girls hair, I volunteered to do this chiild's hair every week or every other week. I told her, she could drop her off on saturday evenings and I'd take care of it.

The next time I saw her, the baby had a perm. I could not believe she did that and I think it is sooooo selfish. This mess-up along with some others is the reason why she and I aren't friends anymore. I am only friends with like-minded people and this chick obviously doesn't have a sound mind.... smh.

 

[Lucie]

This hypothetical question is a lot to wrap my mind around. In my family no one got a relaxer until freshman year of HS! If it was my relative, I would tell them everything I know about the dangers of relaxing a child's hair. I understand everyone is a grown arse adult and should do what they please but that's the problem with this world. No one wants to tell anyone, anything for fear of rejection or not minding their own business. The world doesn't go round because of people minding their own business. We all need each other and do not know everything. I rather tell my family and have them be POed, than to stay quiet.

 

[Ganjababy]

There are people here on LHCF (like IRL) who relax their little one's hair. I would KIM and mind my own business.

If it is family/close friends then I would tell them the reason they should not do it and hope that they heed my advise, but usually they don't.

 

[Eisani]

I just saw a 3 y/o yesterday that was freshly relaxed, twisties in the top w/lil bantu knots and the back down in spiral curls. When dd was 3, she rocked ponytails. Something strange to me about seeing a small child with straight hair that didn't come out of their scalp that way.

 

[Leeda.the.Paladin]

Well, I would do all I could to convince the parent otherwise...but it's their child and they can do what they want, no matter how ill advised (and terrible).