TrulyBlessed
Well-Known Member
This is an article that my friend got from Cosmopolitan magazine and I just had to share. It compares men to the behavior and temperment of various animals and how they can be trained based on their behavior. This is hilarious, enjoy!
6 Ways to Train Your Man
1. To get him to do chores
What is done with CHIMPANZEES: "When we need the chimps to perform a task, we get on their level and play with them for 5 or 10 minutes." Once they have fun, they're more willing to heed commands because they instinctivley know its their turn to return the favor.
Apply to your man: To get what you need done, "indulge him with a few minutes of acting goofy." Then tell him you'll finish playing with him later, as long as he takes out the trash or does whatever else you need him to do. Use this technique consistently and over time, he'll be less likely to associate chores with drudgery.
2. He lacks social graces
What is done with DOGS: "Trainers reward the dog when it behaves and ignores any actions they don't like." Since dogs crave affection, they slowly begin to avoid bad habits and opt for good ones.
Apply it to your man: Men don't want to be treated like children, and if you correct him, he'll feel like you're mothering him. Instead, ignore him when he's being obnoxious, and give him some PDA when he's acting sweet since guys, like dogs, aim to please. Timing is crucial though. Be sure to reward him at the exact moment he engages in a positive behavior; otherwise he won't be able to make the appropriate connection.
3. He bolts when you argue
What is done with HORSES: Beneath the powerful stallion exterior lies a skittish animal. "Thats why they generally respond well to a calming voice and touch from trainers."
Apply it to your man: Like horses, men seem to be hardwired to want to bolt at the first sound of irritation. So even if he's been working your last nerve, try to approach him in a cool, collected manner.
4. He stands his ground
What is done with COUGARS: When tainers want a cougar to bend to their will, they find a middle ground. "Instead of trying to submit or dominate a cougar, trainers try to form a cooperative relationship." They walk tall with squared-off shoulders. This ensures that the trainers don't look like prey but they're not threatening either.
Apply it to your man: If your standing rally close to him with your hands on your hips and your feet wide apart, he'll get defensive and instintively want to fight back. But if you stand meekly and tilt your head while talking to him, he might take it as a sign that you're too submissive. The best way to stay on equal ground is to stand with good posture, your head up, and an open frame so he sees you as being on the same level he is, which will make him more apt to talk things through.
5. He won't drag his butt off the couch
What is done with LIONS: Lions are lazy and will sleep up to 20 hours a day. "Thats why we make use of the animal's active time instead of trying to force it into doing something it doesn't want to when its chilling."
Apply it to your man: If you notice that he prefers working out in the morning, thats a good time to ask him to help you clean when he's finished. if you need something done during his downtime and don't want to wait, bribe him. "Motivate him by making it worth his while."
6. He's not romantic:
What is done with ELEPHANTS: "A trainer would never expect an animal to learn something without teaching it how to do it." For example, if trainers want an elephant to paint as part of a circus act, they'll first show the animal how to curl its trunk around the brush. Next, they'll have it dip the brush into the paint.
Apply it to your man: The average guy is plenty romantic, but is not hardwired to plan out all the little details. You'll have to show him. Start with staging your apartment with cues, like candles, wine, etc. This creates a ritual in his mind. Eventually, not only will he get a sense of what your romantic needs are, but he'll also start making a game plan of his own.
6 Ways to Train Your Man
1. To get him to do chores
What is done with CHIMPANZEES: "When we need the chimps to perform a task, we get on their level and play with them for 5 or 10 minutes." Once they have fun, they're more willing to heed commands because they instinctivley know its their turn to return the favor.
Apply to your man: To get what you need done, "indulge him with a few minutes of acting goofy." Then tell him you'll finish playing with him later, as long as he takes out the trash or does whatever else you need him to do. Use this technique consistently and over time, he'll be less likely to associate chores with drudgery.
2. He lacks social graces
What is done with DOGS: "Trainers reward the dog when it behaves and ignores any actions they don't like." Since dogs crave affection, they slowly begin to avoid bad habits and opt for good ones.
Apply it to your man: Men don't want to be treated like children, and if you correct him, he'll feel like you're mothering him. Instead, ignore him when he's being obnoxious, and give him some PDA when he's acting sweet since guys, like dogs, aim to please. Timing is crucial though. Be sure to reward him at the exact moment he engages in a positive behavior; otherwise he won't be able to make the appropriate connection.
3. He bolts when you argue
What is done with HORSES: Beneath the powerful stallion exterior lies a skittish animal. "Thats why they generally respond well to a calming voice and touch from trainers."
Apply it to your man: Like horses, men seem to be hardwired to want to bolt at the first sound of irritation. So even if he's been working your last nerve, try to approach him in a cool, collected manner.
4. He stands his ground
What is done with COUGARS: When tainers want a cougar to bend to their will, they find a middle ground. "Instead of trying to submit or dominate a cougar, trainers try to form a cooperative relationship." They walk tall with squared-off shoulders. This ensures that the trainers don't look like prey but they're not threatening either.
Apply it to your man: If your standing rally close to him with your hands on your hips and your feet wide apart, he'll get defensive and instintively want to fight back. But if you stand meekly and tilt your head while talking to him, he might take it as a sign that you're too submissive. The best way to stay on equal ground is to stand with good posture, your head up, and an open frame so he sees you as being on the same level he is, which will make him more apt to talk things through.
5. He won't drag his butt off the couch
What is done with LIONS: Lions are lazy and will sleep up to 20 hours a day. "Thats why we make use of the animal's active time instead of trying to force it into doing something it doesn't want to when its chilling."
Apply it to your man: If you notice that he prefers working out in the morning, thats a good time to ask him to help you clean when he's finished. if you need something done during his downtime and don't want to wait, bribe him. "Motivate him by making it worth his while."
6. He's not romantic:
What is done with ELEPHANTS: "A trainer would never expect an animal to learn something without teaching it how to do it." For example, if trainers want an elephant to paint as part of a circus act, they'll first show the animal how to curl its trunk around the brush. Next, they'll have it dip the brush into the paint.
Apply it to your man: The average guy is plenty romantic, but is not hardwired to plan out all the little details. You'll have to show him. Start with staging your apartment with cues, like candles, wine, etc. This creates a ritual in his mind. Eventually, not only will he get a sense of what your romantic needs are, but he'll also start making a game plan of his own.
I feel so sorry for men in many ways because women can't seem to leave well enough alone. If a man has to be trained to your liking, its evident he's not the man for you.
