Not Me, Not Now. What relaxed heads say about going natural!

[xcuzememiss]

At times I am tempted to join the bandwagon( family members.. girls on the board.. celebs..) and go natural.... Then i stop and think "do i really want to BC or transition for 10+ month????" Well i can honestly say no. My relaxed hair is healthy, thick, and strong. Eventually when I get older i might get serious and actually pursue going natural. As of right now I'm loving my relaxed hair! I have a strong feeling that I'm not the only one who is thinking this. Not Me, Not Now. What Relaxed heads say to going Natural.

 

[browny1978]

If I were to go natural, I'd want to do so without the bc. I've been (nearly) bald before - not a real good look on this peanut head! With the way I sweat while working out (5-6 days a week), it's hard enough to stretch my relaxers, so I know to try transitioning would be even more of a strain. I love my hair texture and would love to go natural, but just can't see it happening anytime in the near future...........But who knows? Stretching does seem to get a bit easier each time, allowing me to stretch a little longer each time.......... Time will tell. Thanks to this board, I now have healthy relaxed hair!

 

[MummysGirl]

I had (still have) healthy relaxed hair. I always said I'd eventually go natural in the future... honestly I was thinking maybe 5 years from now or something. Then I said... "Hmmm... maybe when I decide to have children, I'll just stop relaxing and use the 9 months as my transition period", etc etc.... Funny thing is I am not in a relationship now so I have no clue when I will get married and have kids

Well... 1st weekend in February this year, I suddenly decided - I'm going natural now. That's how I make decisions, decisions that actually stick - I just come out and say I'm doing something and I stick to it.

Off Topic (just to explain how I make decisions): I was overweight for a few years, 1999-2002 and I used to say I'd eventually try to lose weight, one day I saw a picture of myself in 2002, an hour later I had joined weightwatchers online.... I lost 40lbs that year.

So I totally understand people saying 'Not Now', it's when YOU are ready to do it that you will. And if one never wants to stop relaxing, who am I to stand in their way? It's been proved over and over again - you can have VERY healthy relaxed hair

So sorry for my longgggg response

 

[browny1978]

^^^^ Hmmm Mummysgirl, I need to get some of those cute scarves/headbands like you have on in your siggy. I'm sure that will help my stretching! Cute braidout!

 

[TeeWhyAre]

i am natural. my favorite relaxed head is sylver2. if i relaxed/texlaxed, i'd use her, toy, dsylla and d lewis as my inspirations as proof that relaxed/texlaxed hair can be healthy and grow to great lengths, too.

i figure folks gotta go natural for their own reasons and from any other societal pressures. Same goes for natural heads looking to relaxers, do it for you and keep your reasons in the front of your mind when you feel discouraged.

 

[harrison]

I was natural for over 10 yrs. I had said at that time no more.. not ever will I get a relaxer again. Textured hairstyles are definitely me... braids, twists, etc. However, after having my 2nd child and reaching a little past APL, my hair became more of a struggle to maintain. I struggled with the idea of relaxing. I found a stylist that was natural and knew exactly what I meant when I said I did not want my hair bone straight, but loosen the texture. Hence, I tex/relaxed my 4z hair.

I have fabulous twist outs.. everytime I wear a twistout.. I get compliments all the time. DH asked me just yesterday -after witnessing another compliment- "what's up with your hair being such a big deal.. its just hair" .. so I laughed and said .. right dear.. its just hair.!

 

[xcuzememiss]

I totally agree. As long as I keep it healthy. Then shoot why not!!! When I get to the poin where I am fed up Ill stop. Until then I luuuuuv the way my hair looks and feels

 

[vivEz daNs lamouR]

This isn't directed towards you OP, but I always find it funny when threads are started about reasons to not go natural or to not relax.

Going natural, just like being relaxed, is not for everybody.

 

[Soliel185]

If you feel the need to justify your reasons for being relaxed then I think you may have more thoughts and feelings about the issue than you're truly admitting..just my 2 cents

I'm natural now, been natural before, been relaxed before, been texlaxed blah blah blah. I'm natural b/c it suits me. If someone asks why I'm natural my response is *shrug* "why not?" I don't need reasons, excuses, explanations or anything else b/c I don't owe anybody anything - especially when it comes to what I do to my own head.

You wanna be relaxed - go on and be the best relaxed head you can be. The same thing goes for being natural, dyed, texlaxed, processed, unprocessed, or anything else.

 

[jamaraa]

Do ya thang girl, don't worry about it. Take good care of your hair and it'll be fine in any case. I must say, as a LIFELONG NATURAL I'm a little tired of seeing people feeling like they have to justify themselves either way. LOL...don't think that having natural hair is some sort of sign of a liberated mind. Do what you feel is best for you.

 

[vivEz daNs lamouR]

If you feel the need to justify your reasons for being relaxed then I think you may have more thoughts and feelings about the issue than you're truly admitting..just my 2 cents

I'm natural now, been natural before, been relaxed before, been texlaxed blah blah blah. I'm natural b/c it suits me. If someone asks why I'm natural my response is *shrug* "why not?" I don't need reasons, excuses, explanations or anything else b/c I don't owe anybody anything - especially when it comes to what I do to my own head.

You wanna be relaxed - go on and be the best relaxed head you can be. The same thing goes for being natural, dyed, texlaxed, processed, unprocessed, or anything else.

You summed EXACTLY what I wanted to say.

I always think of these threads as a subtle broadcast to that one person who might've been trying to convince the thread starter (not this OP literally, just in general) to do something that they might not want to do.

If you want to go natural, GREAT! If not, that's great too! Either way, DO YOU.

No one is putting a gun to anyone's head saying you have to do something. If you like it, I love it.

ETA: I saw a thread like this just the other day in which the OP said that people thought she was natural because she stretched for well over a year, and she ended with "Natural ain't for me. I'm happy for ya'll but this isn't my thing." And in my head I was like, Okay... but why are you feeling the need to justify your choices and decisions?

 

[Junebug D]

Do what's best for you. No one has to wash/comb/style/touch/look at your hair but YOU!

 

[Tafa01]

I have been relaxed since I was a child, then bc'ed and natural for 2 years, then relaxed again. Then natural again for 3 years...now I am relaxed again. Because thats what I feel like at THIS moment in my life. No philosophical/religious/social/whatever over reason.

 

[-PYT]

You summed EXACTLY what I wanted to say.

ETA: I saw a thread like this just the other day in which the OP said that people thought she was natural because she stretched for well over a year, and she ended with "Natural ain't for me. I'm happy for ya'll but this isn't my thing." And in my head I was like, Okay... but why are you feeling the need to justify your choices and decisions?

I feel the exact same...just kinda like "alright...why you telling us?" Maybe it's a subtle way of some people feeling like natural is the way to go, but then don't want to let go of their relaxed hair....when no one is telling them to!

 

[wontonfm]

I'm relaxed now (and have been for years). My hair is the healthiest it has ever been. For a while I thought I would use a relaxer forever as long as my hair is healthy. A few months later I realized that I would eventually (maybe 2 or 3 years from now) want to transition to being natural.

Then I saw "Good Hair" a few weeks ago and the part about relaxers FREAKED.ME.OUT. Before the movie was over I realized that I couldn't responsibly get another relaxer so now I'm transitioning (only 9 or 10 weeks in though!).

We'll see how this goes...

 

[LatterGlory]

Thanks for sharing your opinions on hair ladies.

 

[vivEz daNs lamouR]

Thanks for sharing your opinions on hair ladies.

Was I harsh?

I guess for me, I've just noticed more and more that there are threads that are more often than not re-affirming someone's decision to do what they want to their hair, its like there's this imaginary line of separation between natural heads and relaxed heads.

I don't get why its like that.

 

[BostonMaria]

OK now I see why the other thread was started

OP, if you ever decide to go natural you'll know its the right time. I had APL hair and was scared to let go of it. My hair is my pride and joy and the THOUGHT of transitioning was not very appealing to me. What I didn't know then was that I was going to fall in love with my natural hair. I cut it all off and was APL a year later anyway. It grows back.

Anyway do what's best for you.

 

[xcuzememiss]

The original post wasn't to justify my choice by any means. My haircare journey and hair progress speaks for itself.

 

[xcuzememiss]

It wasn't intended as a jab. But as a convo starter for girls who who honestly don't see the need to transition at this time. There are plenty of reasons to transition, and plenty of reasons not to, this is a thread is intended for the latter.

 

[Anew]

I pretty much agree with everyone in the thread and I can also see why some relaxed ladies "explain" their reasons for relaxing, just from visiting hair boards everyday.

 

[Honey Bee]

^^^ cosigning.

 

[brucebettye]

Do whatever you want to your hair, it is your choice.

 

[foxieroxienyc]

I was natural at one point:

And I also had locs, beautiful locks, I have a pic somewhere but not online at the moment.

I've been relaxed again for almost two years now - started on my HHJ the day I relaxed because I wanted to prove to my stylist I could take care of my hair which up to that point was weaved for 2 years. Of all the styles I've had, I really enjoy my relaxed strands more now than ever before. I prefer straight hair, and I'm not talking type 1 silky, I'm talking my own type 4 cottony silkiness (as I call it). I prefer to remain relaxed because for one I dance just about 6 days a week (I dance professionally), and I also workout 3-4x a week and I SWEAT OUT OF MY HEAD LIKE CRAZY. If I were still natural I'd be straightening my hair all the time causing more damage. Now that I have the tools to keep my hair healthy even as a relaxed head I can rest assured. I'm not sure if I would go natural again, sometimes I feel guilty admitting that. It's not that I don't love my natural hair, I do. However, it's just a preference, and I've also already been there done that. Maybe when I get older, I can definitely see myself rocking a silver cottony mass of fabulous kink again.

 

[BlackMasterPiece]

I was natural at one point:

And I also had locs, beautiful locks, I have a pic somewhere but not online at the moment.

Oh my goodness gracious!!! Just WOW!!!! You look like some of the natural new york models I see walking down the street! Wow what a beautiful head of coil's!

I LOVE your hair texture foxieroxie

I just really can't get over this

 

[foxieroxienyc]

LOL thanks, funny thing, I had no idea what the heck I was doing with my hair at the time. I was just a wash-n-go gal, sometimes a little gel to make the curls pop. I do love my curls, one day I will just rock them again. But at least then, I'll know what I'm doing!

 

[BlackMasterPiece]

I'm still speechless, yea you'll have all of us on ur side whatever way you decide to rock your hair, either way you look great but still.............WOW

 

[Southern Belle]

I was natural at one point:

WOW FoxieRoxie! Just W-O-W.

Girl, you are KILLIN that natural hair. You are TOO pretty. (Not sayin' that you aren't pretty now, but the pictures look like 2 different people...)

 

[BlackMasterPiece]

The subtle brown highlights along with the well defined coils..........I'm just not over that yet, I thought that was a billboard ad for a second.

Thats just unbelieveable, THATS your natural texture?!?!.......whew!

 

[chinablaq]

Kudos to all my Natural girlies out there.....but I personally love this relaxed head of mine. I do see all these Natural heads, and they get thoughts running thru a sistas head, but I think that transition period would drive me crazy! I must say if I could snap my finger and just switch, I would. Growing up my texture was amazing. I do wonder what it would be like natural again. Maybe one day...