SHE RELAXED HER 5 YR OLD'S BEAUTIFUL CURLS!

[SparklingFlame]

She did what she thought was best for her daughter and for her. Five is not to young IMO if the parent knows what shes doing.

Everyone not going to agree and most are prob going to bash this woman but it's her daughter.

I gotta co sign.

My mother relaxed me at four and my hair didnt fall out or break off and it thrived.

 

[msa]

Poor girl. What ever happened to chicks doing their daughters hair? Is it so difficult we have to smack chemicals on them right out of the womb? Five is too young for a relaxer in my opinion.

Heck...I'm gonna invent an in utero kiddie perm.

You would be a billionaire. Let me know when you get started on your formulation so I can invest.

 

[Ediese]

She did what she thought was best for her daughter and for her. Five is not to young IMO if the parent knows what shes doing.

Everyone not going to agree and most are prob going to bash this woman but it's her daughter.

Yep, I agree with you. My sister was battling this same decision for a while with my 5 year old niece. Although I was totally against it, she did what was best for the both of them.

 

[Christina Dior]

why are people so astonished and pissed when a child gets a relaxer? If a relaxed head is properly cared for it will thrive!! Like another poster said the relaxer aint the devil it is bad hair care practices

 

[MizzBrown]

I gotta co sign.

My mother relaxed me at four and my hair didnt fall out or break off and it thrived.

My mom relaxed me somewhere between age 4-6 as well. She said she "just couldnt take it anymore!".

She hated spending hours in the kitchen every Saturday on wash day dealing with my hair.

I loved it. That meant no more burnt ears from the hot comb.

 

[SparklingFlame]

My mom relaxed me somewhere between age 4-6 as well. She said she "just couldnt take it anymore!".

She hated spending hours in the kitchen every Saturday on wash day dealing with my hair.

I loved it. That meant no more burnt ears from the hot comb.

I went thru the same thing with my 6 yr old.

You know what route I went.

And she aint bald.

 

[MizzBrown]

why are people so astonished and pissed when a child gets a relaxer? If a relaxed head is properly cared for it will thrive!! Like another poster said the relaxer aint the devil it is bad hair care practices

Cause it's percieved by some as an act of laziness IMO. Too lazy to deal with the coils, beady bee's, etc.

Growing up, dealing with my natural hair as a child was WORK! There was no taming my afro back in the day..

 

[SparklingFlame]

Cause it's percieved by some as an act of laziness IMO. Too lazy to deal with the coils, beady bee's, etc.

Growing up, dealing with my natural hair as a child was WORK! There was no taming my afro back in the day..

While I agree it is laziness for some, but it is not the reason for everybody who relaxes their childs hair.

Although it is indeed perceived as such.

 

[spelmanlocks]

Although I am relaxed, I feel sad when I hear about young girls getting relaxers. I had natural hair for most of my life, but I've found relaxed hair to take way more work to keep it healthy looking. I rarely see young girls with relaxed hair that looks really healthy.

 

[BostonMaria]

5 is way too young IMHO
I don't see the point of relaxing a child's hair that is 3b/3c. Nothing some water and conditioner can't fix.

 

[DreadlockedLady0171]

why are people so astonished and pissed when a child gets a relaxer? If a relaxed head is properly cared for it will thrive!! Like another poster said the relaxer aint the devil it is bad hair care practices

Because some times when the mom has their daughter's hair relaxed at a young age, they aren't aware of the upkeep. They look to it as a solution to a problem that won't get better with a relaxer, in this instance, moisture problems. The relaxer won't help those issues. If she can't deal with those problems with a 3b/3c head, how can she deal with it on a relaxed head?

In this case the mom is Italian and probably doesn't know how to deal with her hair and thought that this would make her life easier. Hopefully someone will teach her how to properly care for her hair now so that she won't have problems.

 

[mamauv2]

Well, I'm marching down there today! She already started with the heat so I have to set up an intervention. I'll do my best to help, be ITA, most little girls I've seen with relaxers have very short, thin hair.
Also, my daughter has a lot of hair and it's not easy but I wash that stuff every week, I keep it moisturized, I braid it, seal her ends EVERYNIGHT. I stay stalking her ends and her hair is shiny, healthy and thriving. It doesn't take much, just consistency.

 

[tiffupretty]

i had a jheri curl at 7

boy oh boy did i have to have it...still remembers my greasy neck

 

[MizzBrown]

Well, I'm marching down there today! She already started with the heat so I have to set up an intervention. I'll do my best to help, be ITA, most little girls I've seen with relaxers have very short, thin hair.
Also, my daughter has a lot of hair and it's not easy but I wash that stuff every week, I keep it moisturized, I braid it, seal her ends EVERYNIGHT. I stay stalking her ends and her hair is shiny, healthy and thriving. It doesn't take much, just consistency.

You aint playin! At least you are being proactive though instead of chastizing her for bad hair care practices, you are willing to go over there and physically SHOW her what you mean.

That's the big difference. Folks can talk up a storm but won't actually come over and stick their hands in your hair to help you.

Take your stash with you so she can know what to buy and write her up a haircare shopping list!

 

[VettaVetta]

I agree with most of the comments but ofcourse it's not our child maybe her mother could not take doing her hair being that it was so curly. My personal opinion I would not but what she did for her daughter was okay for her. Maybe she has no one to look for advice would be nice for you to school her help her learn with out faulting her for not knowing.

 

[lovenharmony]

why are people so astonished and pissed when a child gets a relaxer? If a relaxed head is properly cared for it will thrive!! Like another poster said the relaxer aint the devil it is bad hair care practices

I can't speak for anyone else, but it's just that a child so small doesn't have the choice whether or not they want their hair to be relaxed I'd be pissed if I had to cut off all my hair because I wanted to be natural when I got old enough to take care of my own hair!

 

[dlewis]

You aint playin! At least you are being proactive though instead of chastizing her for bad hair care practices, you are willing to go over there and physically SHOW her what you mean.

That's the big difference. Folks can talk up a storm but won't actually come over and stick their hands in your hair to help you.

Take your stash with you so she can know what to buy and write her up a haircare shopping list!

I remember a relative saying something to me when I relaxed my daughters hair. That was back in my cussing days.

 

[princessnad]

I don't agree with it, but it's her decision I guess.

I know I wanted a relaxer when I was young and my parental units wouldn't give me one.

 

[~*~ShopAholic~*~]

I wonder why she didn't just ask you (OP) for help, since your daughter is natural and her hair is in such great condition. She could have just paid you wkly to keep it up, that would have saved her alot of time and trouble. Other than that, as long as she knows what to do her hair should be fine.

 

[*closer*2*my*dreams*]

I see both sides...My sorority sister has a 3 year old; the 3 year old's grandmother (the father's mother) relaxed the poor baby's head one weekend because "she did not want to fool with it" that particular weekend. This little girl had some thick hair that i would not want to fool with on a daily basis, but I don't think a relaxer was a way to go.

The mother did do what she thought was right at the time, but longterm, it may not be the best choice, especially considering her hair is "dry". Also, correct me if I'm wrong, but she said she used Mizani? Does Mizani even make relaxers for little girls? i mean, if you're going to relax, wouldn't it be best to use a Just 4 Me or Soft Begginings? Something mild for a young child instead of a harsh adult relaxer?

 

[1QTPie]

This is something I will NEVER EVER agree with or understand. 5 years old is a BABY. What's next? Dying her hair because you always wanted a blonde child? Children's scalps are much more sensitive than ours. The thought of putting something in my child's head that could burn them, blind them, destroy their hair is darn right abusive to me.

And this has nothing to do with my social beliefs about relaxers and black children.


*waiting on the day we start perming our male children's head.*

 

[FlowerHair]

IMO it's too young and if she couldn't take care of 3b/c hair without problems, I don't see her taking care of relaxed delicate hair any better

For 3b/c hair it's so easy to just put her hair in a ponytail and go. That's what I do and it takes around 2-3 minutes a day No way I would put harsh chemicals on my child's body if I didn't have to.

Please update this thread a year from now...

 

[SparklingFlame]

I don't agree with it, but it's her decision I guess.

I know I wanted a relaxer when I was young and my parental units wouldn't give me one.

@parental units.

Coneheads!

 

[envybeauty]

no worse IMO than someone taking a 2 year old to get her hair done at a salon.

i don't get it.

some mother's want to jump the gun on everything.

 

[cutiebe2]

I look at it from a health perspective. A child's scalp is not developed at 5. Apparently its not developed until 13. So you don't really know what the long term effects could be. She probably did not know that. In the end she is not the first mother to make that decision so you can't get upset when you come face to face with what many people do. good luck to her...I hope her daughter's hair stays healthy

 

[Evolving78]

well that baby won't have much hair to take care real soon.

 

[gissellr78]

Too early.

The other day i was at the salon and a little girl around 5 was getting washed, deep conditioned, roller set, in the HOT dryer for an hour then blow dried......poor kid she was about to cry!

At least her mom was taking care of it but jeez...what ever happened to to pig tails and braid....Thats what my mom did and they were crooked

 

[BeetleBug]

Regardless if her hair is 3b/c or 4a/b, 5 years old is too young to relax. I still don't see what hair type has to do with it.

 

[gissellr78]

I look at it from a health perspective. A child's scalp is not developed at 5. Apparently its not developed until 13. So you don't really know what the long term effects could be. She probably did not know that. In the end she is not the first mother to make that decision so you can't get upset when you come face to face with what many people do. good luck to her...I hope her daughter's hair stays healthy

I agree...I got relaxed at 16 and i think thats why i still have some hair on my head

 

[msa]

This is something I will NEVER EVER agree with or understand. 5 years old is a BABY. What's next? Dying her hair because you always wanted a blonde child? Children's scalps are much more sensitive than ours. The thought of putting something in my child's head that could burn them, blind them, destroy their hair is darn right abusive to me.

And this has nothing to do with my social beliefs about relaxers and black children.


*waiting on the day we start perming our male children's head.*

Thank you.

Random but still on topic...there was a woman reported to DCFS because she relaxed her kindergarten daughter's hair and it caused scalp burns, scabs, pus, etc. I can't remember but it was either a teacher or a family member that reported her.