going to stylist for a relaxer after 6 month stretch. help!

[filthyfresh]

Here's the scenario. On Saturday I'm going to Laws Concept Salon, a place that I've gone to from ages 7-19, for a relaxer. I stopped going because my mom stopped paying & I couldn't afford it on my college budget. So I was recently transitioning but decided against it, and my mom (who couldn't stand my NG) has graciously & vehemently offered to pay for my relaxer (which is $75 BTW).

My real issue is, the stylist I'm going to has done my hair several times in my life. But I don't want her messing up my progress. I don't want my hair to be trimmed too much. I just want a light dusting. But I'm actually considering telling her not to trim my hair and just doing it myself later. Also, I would like for her to let the neutralizing shampoo sit in my hair for a few minutes and DC my hair after relaxing. But I don't want to step on her toes. She's watched me grow up from a kid to an adult & she's a great stylist. I've seen her with WL relaxed hair. So she knows how to grow hair. So ladies, what do I do? Also I'm afraid she might look at my NG like . Should I let her know that I stretched and/or tell her about my hair goals?

 

[Rapunzel*]

Here's the scenario. On Saturday I'm going to Laws Concept Salon, a place that I've gone to from ages 7-19, for a relaxer. I stopped going because my mom stopped paying & I couldn't afford it on my college budget. So I was recently transitioning but decided against it, and my mom (who couldn't stand my NG) has graciously & vehemently offered to pay for my relaxer (which is $75 BTW).

My real issue is, the stylist I'm going to has done my hair several times in my life. But I don't want her messing up my progress. I don't want my hair to be trimmed too much. I just want a light dusting. But I'm actually considering telling her not to trim my hair and just doing it myself later. Also, I would like for her to let the neutralizing shampoo sit in my hair for a few minutes and DC my hair after relaxing. But I don't want to step on her toes. She's watched me grow up from a kid to an adult & she's a great stylist. I've seen her with WL relaxed hair. So she knows how to grow hair. So ladies, what do I do? Also I'm afraid she might look at my NG like . Should I let her know that I stretched and/or tell her about my hair goals?

most definitely and school her on how stretching relaxers are healthy(if she asks why)
and don't hesitate to say just a little trim no hair cut

 

[cecilie]

I understand you , I suggest you to go and see her before the relaxer day and explain her that you don't want to trim your hair the relaxer day , and all your others desire and be calm if she looks angry or something like that you have many options you can change hair stylist or go there and continue to explain her how it' s important for you to have your hair done by hair but in your way . Good luck .

 

[civic4800]

Here's the scenario. On Saturday I'm going to Laws Concept Salon, a place that I've gone to from ages 7-19, for a relaxer. I stopped going because my mom stopped paying & I couldn't afford it on my college budget. So I was recently transitioning but decided against it, and my mom (who couldn't stand my NG) has graciously & vehemently offered to pay for my relaxer (which is $75 BTW).

My real issue is, the stylist I'm going to has done my hair several times in my life. But I don't want her messing up my progress. I don't want my hair to be trimmed too much. I just want a light dusting. But I'm actually considering telling her not to trim my hair and just doing it myself later. Also, I would like for her to let the neutralizing shampoo sit in my hair for a few minutes and DC my hair after relaxing. But I don't want to step on her toes. She's watched me grow up from a kid to an adult & she's a great stylist. I've seen her with WL relaxed hair. So she knows how to grow hair. So ladies, what do I do? Also I'm afraid she might look at my NG like . Should I let her know that I stretched and/or tell her about my hair goals?

I would tell her that in the past 6 months, you've been trying some new things with your hair that have been working and because of that, you've set some hair goals for yourself and you'd like to do things a bit differently to help meet your goals. Maybe ask her if she can help you meet your goals...this way she can be part of the process and not feel that you've stepped on her toes.
BTW, if the stylist isn't Susan, can you let me know her name if you're pleased with your results b/c I'm looking for a salon closer to my 'hood.

 

[miami74]

I'm getting a relaxer this Saturday as well, after a 14 week stretch. My stylist is used to relaxing my hair every 5 to 6 weeks, so she is in for a good shock . I have concerns about her wanting to trim because she is scissor happy. A member here suggested that I call her ahead of time and let her know that I don't want a trim. I am also going to let her know that I don't want my hair relaxed bone straight. We'll see how that goes. So maybe you need to talk to your stylist in advance about all your concerns and desires. Best of luck to you.

 

[MD_Lady]

Here's the scenario. On Saturday I'm going to Laws Concept Salon, a place that I've gone to from ages 7-19, for a relaxer. I stopped going because my mom stopped paying & I couldn't afford it on my college budget. So I was recently transitioning but decided against it, and my mom (who couldn't stand my NG) has graciously & vehemently offered to pay for my relaxer (which is $75 BTW).

My real issue is, the stylist I'm going to has done my hair several times in my life. But I don't want her messing up my progress. I don't want my hair to be trimmed too much. I just want a light dusting. But I'm actually considering telling her not to trim my hair and just doing it myself later. Also, I would like for her to let the neutralizing shampoo sit in my hair for a few minutes and DC my hair after relaxing. But I don't want to step on her toes. She's watched me grow up from a kid to an adult & she's a great stylist. I've seen her with WL relaxed hair. So she knows how to grow hair. So ladies, what do I do? Also I'm afraid she might look at my NG like . Should I let her know that I stretched and/or tell her about my hair goals?

I think that would be a good starting point. It's also not a big deal to ask her not to cut it. As far as your other requests, she might get a little touchy about that (even with the most tactful delivery). You might just have to decide whether you'd rather a) alter your routine and spare her feelings or b) risk rubbing her the wrong way and having her shampoo and condition your hair the way you like. Given what you've said about her own hair, this might not even be an issue (especially when you tell her about what you've been trying to do).

 

[MD_Lady]

I would tell her that in the past 6 months, you've been trying some new things with your hair that have been working and because of that, you've set some hair goals for yourself and you'd like to do things a bit differently to help meet your goals. Maybe ask her if she can help you meet your goals...this way she can be part of the process and not feel that you've stepped on her toes.
BTW, if the stylist isn't Susan, can you let me know her name if you're pleased with your results b/c I'm looking for a salon closer to my 'hood.

Oooooooooooohhhhhhhh, diplomacy... I LIKE IT!!!

 

[filthyfresh]

I would tell her that in the past 6 months, you've been trying some new things with your hair that have been working and because of that, you've set some hair goals for yourself and you'd like to do things a bit differently to help meet your goals. Maybe ask her if she can help you meet your goals...this way she can be part of the process and not feel that you've stepped on her toes.
BTW, if the stylist isn't Susan, can you let me know her name if you're pleased with your results b/c I'm looking for a salon closer to my 'hood.

I looooove Susan. She's like an extra-Mom. LOL. I'm not seeing her though, I'm seeing Gina. I'll post pics on Saturday.

And I really like your answer!

 

[PinkPebbles]

I understand you , I suggest you to go and see her before the relaxer day and explain her that you don't want to trim your hair the relaxer day , and all your others desire and be calm if she looks angry or something like that you have many options you can change hair stylist or go there and continue to explain her how it' s important for you to have your hair done by hair but in your way . Good luck .

ITA! Please stand your ground and don't let any stylist pressure you into doing something that you don't want!

 

[filthyfresh]

UPDATE! [LONG]

So I went to the salon. I was originally supposed to see Gina, but thanks to a scheduling error, she wasn't there & the receptionist had scheduled my appointment for the day before. I almost gave up hope, but I asked if there was anyone that would fit me in. Another stylist named Porcha took care of me.

I wasn't too scared of going to her because I'd seen her work before and I liked it. She kept me informed and tried not to keep me waiting too long, but I didn't mind because she was doing me a favor. So another stylist based me while I waited for Porcha. I warned her before taking off my scarf that I was originally transitioning to natural but I decided against it & that I had 6 months of NG under there. She took it off and said, "Girl please, this ain't nothing. I've seen worse." I'm like whoaaaa. LOL. So another stylist named Chereese said, why did you decide not to go natural. I said I miss my hair swinging in the wind. Chereese was like, "Girl, I've been natural for almost 2 years. I transitioned by wearing braids. I couldn't have done it the way you're trying to." Mind you she had healthy, straight, color treated SL hair. I was like . I'd have to think about that. But I resigned to just getting my relaxer anyway.

I looked around checking for what kind of relaxers they had, because I knew they were notorious for using Affirm. I noticed that they had Mizani Butter Blends and I was ecstatic! As soon as Porcha asked me what kind of relaxer I wanted to use, I said "Mizani!"

So she based me a little more and applied my relaxer. She applied it really quickly and combed thru the NG a little and then smoothed it with her hands. She wore gloves as well. I experienced a little burning b/c of them dang electrodes that were glued into my hair from the sleep study I did a few days before (THAT is a whole other story). So she made sure to be careful of that. As soon as I told her I was burning, she quickly got me over to the bowl and washed me out. She spent at least 5-10 minutes just rinsing me with water. Then she applied the conditioner and let it sit for about 5-10 minutes. Then she neutralized me and lathered me up real good 3-4 times, letting the poo sit in my hair for a little while each time.

Then she rinsed me and asked did I want to be wrapped or blowdried. I said wrap me up. And she said, "Yeah, that's much better for your hair. Not so much heat." I was like . So she wrapped my hair, letting me sit under the dryer. She left to go pick up some food and came back, by then I was dry. So she started to comb my hair down and asked, "Are you getting a trim today?" I said, just a small one, only the ends. I'm not trying to lose any length. She said "Okay, I'll let you watch me trim in the mirror so you can see I'm getting your split ends without compromising your length." I almost fell out that chair and died, y'all. Sure enough she got my ends and I've still got some length.

So at the end, she gave me her card and I gave her a $15 tip because she didn't have to take me on and she did an AWESOME job. My feathery bob was cute, but then the wind hit it. LOL. But if you check out my Fotki, you'll see my length. And oh yeah, I HAVE NO PERM BURN! Not even a little bit. Like absolutely none. It's crazy. And my roots are totally straight, with slight texture. Just how I wanted it. Gina's good, but Porcha is my new stylist.

 

[filthyfresh]

Also, I have to add that they have soooooo many LHCF approved products. It's crazy. They have the new Mizani Scalp Care line. They use Elucence religiously. I saw Redken, CHI, Affirm, KeraCare (which they sell), and many other things. Please give this salon a try if you're in the Chicagoland area.

 

[plastic]

im glad u had a good experience , recently there have been some horror stylist stories out there

 

[Blessed_Angel]

I would tell her that in the past 6 months, you've been trying some new things with your hair that have been working and because of that, you've set some hair goals for yourself and you'd like to do things a bit differently to help meet your goals. Maybe ask her if she can help you meet your goals...this way she can be part of the process and not feel that you've stepped on her toes.
BTW, if the stylist isn't Susan, can you let me know her name if you're pleased with your results b/c I'm looking for a salon closer to my 'hood.

Good advice Civic

 

[Platinum]

I'm glad your salon experience turned out so well. Hmm, if I ever decide to relax again, I hope I can have a good stylist like yours.

 

[morehairplease]

Also, I have to add that they have soooooo many LHCF approved products. It's crazy. They have the new Mizani Scalp Care line. They use Elucence religiously. I saw Redken, CHI, Affirm, KeraCare (which they sell), and many other things. Please give this salon a try if you're in the Chicagoland area.

They got it going on . She did a great job your hair looks awesome.

 

[caribgirl]

Your hair looks very nice and I so loved reading your update!! Congrats on your great salon exp!!!!!

 

[Miss*Tress]

It's so refreshing and rare to hear about a positive salon experience. I'm glad things went well for you.

 

[filthyfresh]

Thanks ladies! I really did have a great salon experience, for once. I am in love with that Mizani Butter Blends relaxer. I swear I am. I'm probably going to by some when I become a big bad DIYer.

 

[Energist]

Well be very careful. I had gone to a stylist after a 4 month stretch once and it was HELL! They don't know how to handle hair delicately at that point sometimes They just want to get the comb through

 

[filthyfresh]

Well be very careful. I had gone to a stylist after a 4 month stretch once and it was HELL! They don't know how to handle hair delicately at that point sometimes They just want to get the comb through

I totally understand. But this stylist, she would apply the relaxer with her hands, comb the NG once to distribute it like not even really comb just push the relaxer thru the section she parted, then smooth with her hands. She was actually pretty gentle with my hair. But I know what you mean. They used to have this one lady that was super rough with people's heads while relaxing and while rinsing/neutralizing. And she would let you burn, wouldn't pay attention. SMH. Ridiculous. And if you were burning she'd still scratch the mess out of your scalp with her fingernails. It was completely insane.

 

[TrendySocialite]

I'm glad you had a pleasant experience. Not all stylists are the same and not all are hard headed and won't listen to you and your needs.

I get frustrated with people who diss stylists so hard. If stylist after stylist is so horrible, what is the common denominator...YOU!!!!!!

Off my soapbox now...LOL