• ⏰ Welcome, Guest! You are viewing only 2 out of 27 total forums. Register today to view more, then Subscribe to view all forums, submit posts, reply to posts, create new threads, view photos, access private messages, change your avatar, create a photo album, customize your profile, and possibly be selected as our next Feature of the Month.

Need help bad!

⏳ Limited Access:

Register today to view all forum posts.

Register Log in
S

SharonMM

New Member
Hello all. I'm a newbie in serious need of some advice and I hope you all can help. I have only trimmed my hair 2-3 times this year and its shorter now than it was a year ago! This must be due to breakage, because my hair trims take off no more than q 1/2 inch. Also, in addition to breakage, it seems like my hair is thinning as well. This could be from clip in extensions that I wear on most days. I've been told they are the most gentle option, but they feel heavy after a while and tend to start pulling, and the clips get tangled in my hair so I always pull some off or break some off when I take them out.
Also, I am caucasian. I don't think my Caucasian hairdresser really knows how to deal with my problems. My hair is extremely dry, brittle and breaks off like crazy. I blow dry and round brush everyday plus a curling iron, but I try to keep the heat low. I don't wash my hair everyday, but I usually wet it and use a deep conditioner. I don't even bother with regular conditioner, its too light. Then I use a rich leave in condrioner and morroccan oil, then I blowdry with a round brush. Then I have to follow up with the curling iron to make it smooth. But it always still looks so dry! And it is. Dry brittle inflexible hair. I seriously do not know what to do. Also I use a reconstruction mask and rotate with a moisturizing one.
I'd love to hear some suggestions on my routine and for products because mine are not effective. I tried to read thru some of the threads so as to not be redundant, but you all use a lot of abbreviations! And IDK what they mean! Plus, I haven't even heard of a lot of the different methods you are using. So I apologize in advance for my ignorance on this topic.
 
Blow drying with flat ironng everyday is a no go. How about washing every other day or every three days? (If your hair is brittle, I'm assuming it isn't oily.)

Put it in a ponytail and call it a day or awhile.
 
Yes, I highlight, but not all over color. My hair is curly around my face and the nape of the neck section, but the crown section and back of my head is only wavy. Which I why I have to heat style so much...I look CRAZY if I just air dry bcz the curly underhair proofs up and the top hair just kinda lays there.
 
Ever thought about a relaxer to straighten your hair? I work with a caucasion lady that relaxes her hair. Then you wouldn't have to blow dry or flat iron so much. Also try Aphogee products for damaged hair.
 
SharonMM said:
Ok, so this is what I am talking about this is what happens when I air dry. So.ory for looking like I'm getting ready to rob a bank. I would never go out in public with my hair like this!





https://picasaweb.google.com/108857858669373976769/NastyHair
Click to expand...


SharonMM - sorry to hear you're having trouble. But you've come to the right place. Hair is hair - whether its caucasian or not. So you're probably going to get a lot of advice and suggestions. It will be mostly your job to sift through and do what's best for you and your hair.

Don't jump on every bandwagon. And start off keeping it simple, and watch how your hair responds.

The fist thing I would do, is stop using the clipins. You've clearly stated you're getting breakage when taking some of them out. They need to go.

Second, you need to address the dryness. Deep moisture conditioning under a hooded dryer for me. Also, using light oils to seal in the moisture might help too. You should consider that daily blowdrying and curling is definitely doing damage to your hair.

When my hair was distressed, I came here too, and with all the wonderful advice from the ladies here, I was able to resuscitate the dying. But I had to immediately go into "protective" mode with my hair, and baby it for a while to nurse it back to health. For me that meant keeping the hair and ends hidden. And not exposing them to harsh outer elements. Protective styling is golden here. I bun daily. I moisturize and seal daily. I keep my ends tucked away often.

Perhaps you need to just baby your hair for awhile. You should be treating you hair like its the finest silk that you would never want to damage.

This is just a little bit, but I know others will chime in with great advice too.
 
OP, you should really be asking people with simimilar hair to yours. Because I've never experienced having hair like yours, I wouldn't truly be able to help you.
 
welcome @SharonMM

does your shampoo contain sulfates? if it does i would nix it. i like giovanni 50/50 and the smooth as silk.

for rinse out and deep condtioning i love aubrey's conditioners and they are very thick gbp, j.a.y and honeysuckle rose are my faves from this line.

a good hardcore protein treatment is komaza protein strengthner and you could follow it with the aubrey's condtioner.

you also look to have very fine strands to me, the clip-ins are added weight that lead to more breakage.

i would stop coloring for a while.

get some ppl like tabletop dryers.....mine is a bonnet style one.

roller sets could be a stylling option for you and you could pincurl your hair at night so it lasts a few days before having to wash again.

you need to nix the blowdryer and flatiron for a while, as I think of other info I'll add it here.

giovanni and aubrey's can be purchased from whole foods, amazon,vitamin shoppe, and vitacost.com

heré is komaza's site:
http://www.komazahaircare.com/

^^i would even suggest you get a haircare analysis as she is studying to be a trichologist^.
 
Last edited:
Deep conditioning should be your first stop. I credit letting quality conditioners sit on my hair with my hair's health. I use Greek yogurt from trader joes as it is a cheap and effective way for my hair to absorb nutrients.

Do you live in a cold place? If so get your moisture levels up because the cold air and dry heat from your heater is sucking it away and intensifing your breakage
 
Hi :) You're getting some very good advice in this thread. Deep conditioning for moisture, protein to combat the stress from heat styling and I would add that you may have to incorporate some updos and/or buns in to your regimen to give your hair a break from daily styling.

There are some other great forums too that you might want to check out for additional resources.

http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/
http://www.naturallycurly.com/curltalk/

Good luck getting your hair back in its best condition :)

PS We do use a crazy amount of abbreviations, so here is a post to help you get started http://www.longhaircareforum.com/showthread.php?t=20774
 
The lightening + daily blow drying and clip-ins are going to leave you with very little hair. You're going to need to find a way to enjoy your hair in it's natural state most of the time to get things back on track. And not all deep conditioners are going to help you if they're trying to correct problems you do not have.

For instance, if you're using a protein deep conditioner every time you condition and you never, ever use a moisturizing deep conditioner your hair will start snapping off when you blow dry. SharonMM grab some snacks, pull up a chair and get REAL comfortable with the search feature here. I think you need to start from scratch... and consider leaving the highlights alone for a while. You should list the products you're using right now too, that'll give us a better idea of what going on with you.
 
welcome! sounds like you need some good moisturizing deep conditioning sessions under the dryer for 15-30 mins. you also need a good leave-in.

for starters, try using Suave Almond and Shea Butter shampoo and conditioner! it is very moisturizing.

you can also try Aussie Moist conditioner for daily use and Aussie Moist 3 min Miracle for deep conditioning.

layoff of the heat for awhile. your hair needs a break. dry airdrying your hair and try some protective styles like a bun, ponytail, a french braid in the back,

for leave-in conditioners and moisturizers, try Neutrogena Triple Silk leave-in and Daily Moisturizer.

hope this helps!
 
SharonMM said:
Hello all. I'm a newbie in serious need of some advice and I hope you all can help. I have only trimmed my hair 2-3 times this year and its shorter now than it was a year ago! This must be due to breakage, because my hair trims take off no more than q 1/2 inch. Also, in addition to breakage, it seems like my hair is thinning as well. This could be from clip in extensions that I wear on most days. I've been told they are the most gentle option, but they feel heavy after a while and tend to start pulling, and the clips get tangled in my hair so I always pull some off or break some off when I take them out.
Also, I am caucasian. I don't think my Caucasian hairdresser really knows how to deal with my problems. My hair is extremely dry, brittle and breaks off like crazy. I blow dry and round brush everyday plus a curling iron, but I try to keep the heat low. I don't wash my hair everyday, but I usually wet it and use a deep conditioner. I don't even bother with regular conditioner, its too light. Then I use a rich leave in condrioner and morroccan oil, then I blowdry with a round brush. Then I have to follow up with the curling iron to make it smooth. But it always still looks so dry! And it is. Dry brittle inflexible hair. I seriously do not know what to do. Also I use a reconstruction mask and rotate with a moisturizing one.
I'd love to hear some suggestions on my routine and for products because mine are not effective. I tried to read thru some of the threads so as to not be redundant, but you all use a lot of abbreviations! And IDK what they mean! Plus, I haven't even heard of a lot of the different methods you are using. So I apologize in advance for my ignorance on this topic.
Click to expand...

Pics would help a lot of your hair now and pics from last years hair too. Its always nice to have another (or 3455543) pair of eyes:)
 
You can deep condition your hair with the best conditioners, but if you are blow drying and curling your hair EVERYDAY it's not going to do much to help your hair. Stop blow drying and let your hair air dry, and if you need to smooth it afterwards use a low heat setting on the curling/flat iron.... 250 degrees is low. Try using a protein treatment also.
 
Welcome. From my observation with friends with Caucasian hair with a wave/curl pattern it helps to get a good cut that will bring out your curl so you don't have to fight so hard to style. Not every stylist can cut curly hair well so get a recommendation if you choose that option.
 
Just because we don't have the same hair texture I am sure we can help. (I don;t think anyone truly has the same hair textiure)
I would suggest stop using heat like NOW.
Clarify with a clarifying shampoo
Protein treatment & moisture deep treatment weekly for one month. Co wash 1-2x a week.
Use a leave in
Try using natural products as the silicone builds up and prevents moisture to penetrate the strand.
Can you wear buns while getting your hair back in shape? Check youtube for really cute bun styles.
Ensure you're drinking lots of water
Hope this helps & WELCOME!!! :-)
 
Welcome! In addition to the great advice above:

- Try wearing your hair natural and airdried sometimes! I think your hair looks pretty good- not at all a disaster! Once you get the hang of styling and figure out what products work for you, you'll be amazed. As it gets healthier, it will look better and better airdried.

- Stop blowdrying & flatironing or limit these to a few times a year or as little as possible (even just doing it 1/2 or 1/4 as much would help). You can straighten your hair easily by wrapping it when it is wet (search youtube for how-to videos) and then using a hooded dryer. Indirect heat is much less damaging.

- Protective style frequently (wearing your hair up) until you are past shoulder length- the hair rubs on your shoulders breaking it.

- It looks like you have fine hair. Incorporate protein conditioners into your regimine.

- Learn to love your hair! It looks like you have naturally wavy hair. Start keeping your eye out for inspirational pictures of ladies with similar hair to yourself. Try to work with your hair, rather than thinking you need to tame it into something it's not. Let it blossom into your crowning glory :)

And, while this is a great board with lots of info, you might also wanna check out http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/forum.php . There are many ladies there with similar hair type to yourself who can give more specific info on products/regimines/etc.

Good luck!
 
It looks like you need some oil!
Oil is your friend when you have puffy hair, maybe grapeseed oil?

OR have a look around for oils by like loreal etc. Put a little bit on your hair when its like this and it should help. Heat styling everyday is such a bad idea though!
 
Hey @SharonMM. Welcome.

Google "The Curly Girl Method: The Basics The Curly Girl Method" by Lorraine Massey. This is a fantastic book and method created by Lorraine Massey (she's also caucasian). Most of the methods that we use here grew out of her basic regimen. Basically, stay away from sulfate containing shampoo, co-wash when possible and use a good moisturizing leave-in conditioner.

Good Luck.

ETA:
Basic reggie - Weekly:
(*) clarifing shampoo - to start off with a "clean" palate. Only clarify about once a month.
(1) co-wash (cw)
(2) light protien rinse, like aphogee 2 min. (start off with once every 2-weeks to see how your hair responds, increase/decrease as needed).
(3) good moisturizing deep conditioner (dc)
<wash out DC>
(4) good moisturizing leave-in conditioner
(5) sealing oil - something very light for you, like jojoba or grapeseed oil
(6) style - I recommend bunning for awhile to give your hair a break. STAY AWAY from heat (that means blow dryers and flatirons).

Daily or As Needed:
(1) CW
(2) Seal
(3) Style

rinse/repeat

You should see a difference in a few weeks.
 
Last edited:
Wow, thank you all for the thoughtful replies! I am really appreciative the education, because the products and methods I have been using seriously aren't working for me, which even my hairdresser was at a loss for advice because I'm already doing everything "right". According to her, hair dryers and curling irons don't get hot enough to cause damage, only flat irons do. So since I don't flat iron, I figured I was good to go. She tells me that the bleach isn't bad because she never applies it through my lenghths, just onto the out growth. She tells me I need more moisture, which we can all agree on...lev But I am using Aveda dry remedy shampoo and mask, and bumble & bumble leave in, plusoil moroccan oil on top of that. She talked me into getting a deep conditioning treatment which was and all she did was spray this stuff on and then rinsed it out. I couldn't tell a difference either. So, Idk what more I can do to get more moisture. I asked about trying a richer conditioner, but she said it would be too much for me because my hair is too fine. And she's right, it is pretty fine. But I'm using a mask heavy leave in and oil,on unwashed hair and it still looks dry, not greasy. Actually, my hair never gets oily, but I still wash 2-3 days a week to get the hairspray out, and I smoke cigarettes too, so my hair smells all smoky. But if it weren't for that I could probably go a whole week with no wash and it wouldn't be greasy . So for the moment, here's what I do/use. Shampoo aveda dry remedy 2-3 x a week. DC 4-5 x's a week with dry remedy , tigi dumb blonde or h20 plus seaweefd reconstructing mask. I rotate between these. I almost never stick with one product, I keep thinking there's got to be a miracle product out there so I try them all. Anyways, Then if my hair is wet I put B&B leave in and Moroccan oil. If its dry, I use dry shampoo and moroccon oil. Then I blow dry on low with a round brush. Then I follow up with a ceramic curling iron on medium heat. Then I put my clip ins in. I have to do a lot of backbrushing at my roots so that they stay in. Then I usually do a little more curling iron to get it al blended, then I hairspray and go. I actually love wearing extensions. It's going to be very difficult for me to get away from those. Does a sew-iun weave qualify as a protective style? Because seriously the only time I feel satisfied with my hair is when it isnt mine.
You know, It's very frustrating that Ive been growing my hair out for three years but somehow its shorter now than it was then. And to have spent so much money on products that don't really help. I just keep getting more and more expensive ones because maybe they work better? I don't flat iron or use home dye or harshshampoos. So, I'm good to my hair, or at least I thought I was, and still it keeps bra.
 
SharonMM

you have fine strands so i'm wondering would sew-ins still be too much weight and lead to breakage? also hair is often left out to cover the "Track" (weft weave is sewn on) and for many the hair that's left out ends up getting damaged because so much is done so it will blend with the sewn-in hair.

are you deep conditioning with heat? cause if you aren't it sisn't working. if you don't have a bonnet dryer you can put on 2 plastic caps and clean-up around the house for an hour or so.

you use great products but your technique in caring for your hair is awful because you use way too much heat and your strands are fine. you need a low manipulation, low heat regimen. i see that you dc more than you wash, can you explain? are you deep conditioning on dry hair and rinsing the product without washing?

i know you won't like this but smoking robs the body of nutrients and oxygen and the hair and nails are last to get nutrients even in a healthy body so you already are in a deficit. that compunded with everything else could be a factor as well.

i'm bumping to see what the ladies think........................
 
Shoot sorry I left off mid sentence.. my phone was about to die! Anyways, southerncitygirl, I use deep conditioner in the shower without shampooing, but on wet hair. So I jump in the shower, rinse my hair, throw some conditioner in, then do all my other washing, then I rinse the conditioner out very last. So it sits on my hair for a good 10-15 minutes. I am going to get one of those bonnet dryers though bcz you're right, I'm probably not getting the max benefit without the heat. My husband is going to LHAO when he sees me with it on. I was wondering too, since my hair and scalp is so dry, should I be taking an extra step to treat my scalp? I never do anything for my scalp. Also, how can you go to sleep or workout without getting your hair all jacked up? Because for me, I basically need to start from scratch anytime I do either things. I don't know what goes on in my sleep but I wake up with my hair all stuck to my face one side, matted up and kinked and sticking out all over. I'll post a picture one day.. its crazy. Then if I workout, all the sweat pretty much destroys any type of style I had going. I wear a swear rag around my head but it still gets sweaty from my scalp. So, Idk. Guess its just something I will have to deal with.
 
Last edited:
SharonMM

hubby will laugh atcha but pay him no mind:lol: you should either sleep on a satin or silk pillowcase or use a satin/silk scarf or bonnet for bed. it will minimize breakage and help the hair retain moisture.:yep: you can use a oil on your but use a very light hand...grapeseed would be a good one.
 
I have a completely different hair texture than you @SharonMM, duh, lol, but I'm a smoker too and I have fine hair. When I first joined, it was bleh: lank, breaking, a mess. (@southerncitygirl can cosign) I grew it all out, but what helped me was Wen. It's super-moisturizing, so much so that after a few months, I wound up over-moisturized. So make sure you also use a protein, like Nexxus Emergencee. And no more heat! If you just haaave to straighten, try to extend the wash with Oscar Blandi Dry-Shampoo. It's very light, perfect for fine hair.

(@scg, I can finally give advice! :lol:)
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Similar threads

KinksnCurlz
I NEED HELP!!!
Replies
1
Views
745
KinksnCurlz
KinksnCurlz
Mook's hair
Airdry...Can this be bad sometimes?
Replies
9
Views
2K
Arcadian
Arcadian
Rezgirl
Conair Hot Air Styler
Replies
4
Views
1K
FindingMe
FindingMe
BronxDiva
Has anyone ever tried this....
Replies
3
Views
1K
Lindy
L
isawstars
frizzy ends
Replies
7
Views
2K
dimpalz
dimpalz
Back
Top