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Setback Thread

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LexiDior

LexiDior

Well-Known Member
Official Setback Thread

I know im not the only one here who feels like giving up at times but i keep pushing. This is a support group for everyone, relaxed, natural, texlax, no matter what you are.

*Post your setbacks and comebacks and ladies who are on the right track, give us inspiration.* :grin:
 
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i had a setback last year due to some bad box color. it caused an allergic reaction and left me with a lot of shedding and a bald spot. that was last year in the spring. it has filled in since. i used Megatek to in that spot mixed with some castor oil.

i had a setback due to protein overload. my hair was like straw and so tangled, i thought i was going to have to cut all of my hair off. i had to cut off a few inches though. but i was able to get through it. now i stay away from strong protein products.
 
I am currently experiencing a set-back. I cut about 2". I wouldn't mind the 2" but now I can't pull my hair up or back easily with a million pins.

I am staying away from all protein and protein-like products for quite a long time. I am hoping weeks and weeks of DCing and cowashing will turn my hair around. My hair is still pretty dry and brittle. And my ends dry out quickly and just snap off.
 
faithVA said:
I am currently experiencing a set-back. I cut about 2". I wouldn't mind the 2" but now I can't pull my hair up or back easily with a million pins.

I am staying away from all protein and protein-like products for quite a long time. I am hoping weeks and weeks of DCing and cowashing will turn my hair around. My hair is still pretty dry and brittle. And my ends dry out quickly and just snap off.
Click to expand...

so the protein did this??
 
LexiDior said:
so the protein did this??
Click to expand...

It is the only thing that I can think of. I don't have anything else in my regimen I can exclude.

I DC every week.
I moisturize and seal.
I don't do heat.
My hair is in protective styles 95% of the time.
I wear a satin bonnet every night.
I don't use any cones.
I use mostly natural products.

I think I started my healthy hair journey off wrong trying to balance moisture protein, doing moisture one week and protein the next. I don't think my hair has every recovered.

My hair is never that mushy feeling people have described. So the only thing I can think of is letting go of all protein. Let's see if my hair ever feels mushy. I don't think I can save the hair that is already damaged though.
 
I've had 1 (or more) Set-Back Per Year since I became a DIY'er.

Here are some of my Disasters (in no particular order)

1) Playing around with a FHI Runway Flat-Iron (didn't know how to properly use it)

2) Self-Relaxing *too nervous about doing additional damage and I know I overlapped etc.....* May give it another 'try' sometime in the near future

3) Not properly detangling and ended up having Mats/Tangles/Loc'ing/SSKs

4) Tying my Durag too tight and caused breakage around that area where I was tying it.
 
IDareT'sHair said:
I've had 1 (or more) Set-Back Per Year since I became a DIY'er.

Here are some of my Disasters (in no particular order)

1) Playing around with a FHI Runway Flat-Iron (didn't know how to properly use it)

2) Self-Relaxing *too nervous about doing additional damage and I know I overlapped etc.....* May give it another 'try' sometime in the near future

3) Not properly detangling and ended up having Mats/Tangles/Loc'ing/SSKs

4) Tying my Durag too tight and caused breakage around that area where I was tying it.
Click to expand...

Girl, me and u have the same problems, #3 and 4 :spinning: It just occured to me a few weeks ago that tying my durag in the same spot for years (and tying too tight to keep it from coming off) is no doubt the reason why my nape will not grow. I am APL everywhere but there. Once I started switching it up, I have slowly but surely starting seeing some improvement. I also have been covering my durag with a satin bonnet ($1 at the dollar store!) on top in case it starts to slip since I tie it alot looser than I used to. :yep:
 
crazytrish75 said:
Girl, me and u have the same problems, #3 and 4 :spinning: It just occured to me a few weeks ago that tying my durag in the same spot for years (and tying too tight to keep it from coming off) is no doubt the reason why my nape will not grow. I am APL everywhere but there. Once I started switching it up, I have slowly but surely starting seeing some improvement. I also have been covering my durag with a satin bonnet ($1 at the dollar store!) on top in case it starts to slip since I tie it alot looser than I used to. :yep:
Click to expand...

@crazytrish75

Me too Girlie!:nono: It didn't 'dawn' on me until the damage was done.:blush:

I had been using the Du-rag for a Wig Cap under my wig and it didn't occur to me that I was double-tying the strings too tightly.

And when I realized it, the damage had been done.

And you already read my post about my major Detangling fail.:lol:

We'll get it together.:yep:
 
IDareT'sHair
Yes we will! I just ordered the denman comb from amazon, I will keep you updated when I get it. Even freshly relaxed bone straight (which I didn't intend to do) I am still tangling and getting ssk's..sigh...we'll get it figured out:yep:
 
IDareT'sHair

Still working on finding a good detangler. Its the one part of my regimen I still haven't nailed. Mane and tail did great at first, but now that my hair is thickening back up and gaining length, nothing seems to be doing it real well anymore. What do u use? I tried in the shower with condish, lost alot of hair that way:nono: So far detangling when it is damp, then spraying a detangler seems to be better but need something a little more slippery for best results.
 
crazytrish75

I like QB Coco Tree Detangling Ghee (it's a Creme). Marie Dean also have several Creme Detanglers that I love. (Ususally use these Fall/Winter)

Focus on using a Spritz/Spray for Spring/Summer

In the Spritz, I like (in no particular order):

MOP - Modern Organic Products *Pear Detangler*
Afroveda - Moringa & Ginseng Detangler
Claudie - Leave-In Spritz *been discontinued*
It's Perfectly Natural - Turn Me Loose Detangler
 
I recently had a setback. My hair was full of splits and was just crispy looking. No matter what I did it was still breaking. I wanted to hold onto my "length" my hair was grazing APL. I just decided to cut it to NL and get rid of most of the splits. Sure, I have nearly no hair now buts it thicker and healthier looking. Right now I am constantly wet bunning to retain length and so far it is working for me.
 
So far protein has been really good to my hair but if i had to cut my hair to NL from APL i would be so hurt.
 
I had major set-back in October of 2009 - I left my relaxer on too long and my hair broke off. What I did was cut it all off and installed box braids. I've been wearing braids without breaks since December of 2009 and am about to remove them in 2 weeks, that's the first week of July you all. I am really excited because I have not seen my hair in almost 2 years and 7 months. I would rebraid every 9 weeks and that was it. In July I will be texlaxing, no more bone straight, and I will be incorporating the techniques of Ulovemeg2 and Healthyafrohair to keep my hair healthy.
 
Misseyl said:
I had major set-back in October of 2009 - I left my relaxer on too long and my hair broke off. What I did was cut it all off and installed box braids. I've been wearing braids without breaks since December of 2009 and am about to remove them in 2 weeks, that's the first week of July you all. I am really excited because I have not seen my hair in almost 2 years and 7 months. I would rebraid every 9 weeks and that was it. In July I will be texlaxing, no more bone straight, and I will be incorporating the techniques of Ulovemeg2 and Healthyafrohair to keep my hair healthy.
Click to expand...

Post a pic when you do it. I want to see your hair!!
 
I had one the end of last year. I hadn't relaxed in some time and tried a new shampoo and conditioner system (try not to do this ladies. Experiment on freshly touched up hair if necessary) and it was not moisturizing enough for my hair and I had breakage galore. I straightened my hair and my ponytail was see through. Just straight see through. I was so angry. :/
 
I had a HUGE set back a few years ago which caused me to chop my MBL hair down to 4".

This was due to shedding caused by birth control and because of this I had become very frustrated and did not gain as much length as I had previously. I had a ton of breakage.

Over the past year or so, I have focused on growing my hair back out and am now currently at BSL. I should be back to where I was before the setback by the end of the year. :yep:
 
faithVA said:
It is the only thing that I can think of. I don't have anything else in my regimen I can exclude.

I DC every week.
I moisturize and seal.
I don't do heat.
My hair is in protective styles 95% of the time.
I wear a satin bonnet every night.
I don't use any cones.
I use mostly natural products.

I think I started my healthy hair journey off wrong trying to balance moisture protein, doing moisture one week and protein the next. I don't think my hair has every recovered.

My hair is never that mushy feeling people have described. So the only thing I can think of is letting go of all protein. Let's see if my hair ever feels mushy. I don't think I can save the hair that is already damaged though.
Click to expand...

Def sounds like protein overload. Before I knew better, I did protein a lot which constantly had my hair brittle and breaking to just a few inches. I then swore off protein and begin doing deep moisturizing conditioners weekly(Kenra) which grew my hair a lot. I'm starting to incorporate mild proteins back in but only right after my texlax (aphogee keratin 2 min)
 
I've been on my HHJ for 10 months now. My hair was always dry and brittle before my journey began. My hair us far softer and nicer now but I had to cut off about the 2 inches I managed to grow due to dry, breaking split ends. I think it my pre-HHJ hair that's so bad. I've always had thick hair but my hair up to Chin length is THICK and I'm relaxed. So I may be hanging around SL for a while until I ct off all my old hair
 
A setback is what brought me here as a subscriber in 2009. I got my hair heat styled and it broke off badly in the back and at the sides. I had not been properly moisturizing my hair and I could not remember the last time that I did a DC. After six months, I decided to BC because I could not get my hair to stop breaking and the condition of my hair was making me depressed.

After that BC, I used heat sparingly, regularly conditioned and DC'd my hair, and I thought that in June 2011 I could return to heat use. Well, I was wrong. I went to a young lady who proudly announced that if I came back to her a few more times my hair wouldn't be curly anymore...imagine my shock and fear. One month later my hair was still just as pretty as the day she flat ironed it. I finally got around to washing my hair and it just wasn't the same hair at all. My hair was perfectly straight in many places and while it wasn't breaking as badly as it was in 2009 during my setback, I just couldn't go around with half of my head curly and the other half straight.

I tried to "transition" out of the heat damage, but I was not patient enough. In December 2011, I got my hair heat styled again, and it was gorgeous, so I styled with heat again in January, at which point I realized transitioning using heat was actually "training" my newly growing hair to grow in straight, so I decided to do another BC.

So here I am. Today I have 3 1/4 inches all the way around. My hair is growing very well - since I've been heat free my edges have made a wonderful comeback! I hope that I am finished with setbacks, at least ones that require a full scale BC.
 
IDareT'sHair said:
prettybyrd

I really hope/pray I am finished with S/B's too Gurl.....:nono:

My latest self-induced one (the Durag) I could :buttkick: myself.:lol:
Click to expand...

IDareT'sHair, I know right?! :spinning: I like to think that with each setback we are getting smarter. While we may still make mistakes, it won't be the same mistakes. :)

No more durags tied around the nape for you, and no more heat tool wielding stylists for me! :grin:
 
One day my hair is doing great and the next its breaking off. today ill wash it because i think i bagged my head to long. My hair seems damaged now for some reason so im wondering if its the protein treatment.
 
LexiDior said:
One day my hair is doing great and the next its breaking off. today ill wash it because i think i bagged my head to long. My hair seems damaged now for some reason so im wondering if its the protein treatment.
Click to expand...

does it feel like straw, hard, tough to comb through
protein overload
need to get the moisture back in


or does it feel mushy, stringy?
moisture overload
need a protein treatment

yes i used the Aphogee 2 step. i accidently fell asleep with it in my hair. plus all of my products had a lot of protein in them. i had to do a lot of research on ingredients to figure out what not to use anymore.

i first used a tablespoon of salt mixed with my conditioner to get my hair back soft again. once i did that i had to find shampoos and conditioners that didn't have a lot of protein in them or ingredients that acted like protein.

getting a touchup at 6-7 weeks helped too. it helped to open the cuticle up.

using products that were liquid/moisture based helped too. i stopped using cream moisturizers.

anything that says treatment, strong and healthy, reconstruct, or rebuild, i stay away from. that lets me know that it has some sort of protein in it. i need moisture.
 
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shortdub78 said:
does it feel like straw, hard, tough to comb through
protein overload
need to get the moisture back in


or does it feel mushy, stringy?
moisture overload
need a protein treatment

yes i used the Aphogee 2 step. i accidently fell asleep with it in my hair. plus all of my products had a lot of protein in them. i had to do a lot of research on ingredients to figure out what not to use anymore.

i first used a tablespoon of salt mixed with my conditioner to get my hair back soft again. once i did that i had to find shampoos and conditioners that didn't have a lot of protein in them or ingredients that acted like protein.

getting a touchup at 6-7 weeks helped too. it helped to open the cuticle up.

using products that were liquid/moisture based helped too. i stopped using cream moisturizers.

anything that says treatment, strong and healthy, reconstruct, or rebuild, i stay away from. that lets me know that it has some sort of protein in it. i need moisture.
Click to expand...

it feels dry although i put oil on it while it dried. i wonder if a DC would bring it back to life??
 
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