I hate my 4b hair!

[L.Brown1114]

i don't hate the fact that it's 4b (although sometimes it gets so dry i wanna punch it in its face)

its where it is. on the sides by my temples and in the middle of it is 3c hair?? wtf im scared to see how my hair is going to grow out. do I do two strand twists for the rest of my life?? will it look weird once it grows out??

ugh im so frustrated
im hoping the 3c will grow over the 4b and no one will notice since my 3c will look way longer than the 4b will but idk its just a theory.....

 

[13StepsAhead]

So why do you hate the location? would it make a difference if it were someplace else? is it causing problems?

 

[L.Brown1114]

So why do you hate the location? would it make a difference if it were someplace else? is it causing problems?

i feel if it wa in the back or somwhere in the crown it wouldnt matter, or even if the hair in between it was 4a it wouldnt look so drastic. im just worried about how its gonna look when it grows out

 

[PPGbubbles]

Its okay OP I think all of us 4's have a love/hate relationship with our hair at some point in our journey.

I have realize that twist/braidouts will pretty much be my reality. I don't have wash and wear hair, and I got 3 textures going on as well. I just waiting till it grows longer because long hair seem to look nice whether your 2C or 4Z lol

 

[Melody.Monroe]

You have WACK PATCHES!! LOL! But um...yeah at the CROWN is worse...beleive me because thats where my 4 hair is. And its bad. I guess worse in person. But most people say it gets better as it gets longer. I am experimenting with Wash'N'Gos right now and I am learning to deal with my Wack Patch...I feel your pain and we all will get through it with the helf of LHCF....

 

[L.Brown1114]

^^what is a wack patch?? is that like scab hair??
sorry im not on here often, im a BHM junkie im not up on the lingo

 

[diadall]

You have WACK PATCHES!! LOL! But um...yeah at the CROWN is worse...beleive me because thats where my 4 hair is. And its bad. I guess worse in person. But most people say it gets better as it gets longer. I am experimenting with Wash'N'Gos right now and I am learning to deal with my Wack Patch...I feel your pain and we all will get through it with the helf of LHCF....

Really? It gets better as it gets longer? That gives me hope. My most difficult section is the crown. Mine is about 9 inches right now. It is difficult because it dries quickly and requires more product.

 

[13StepsAhead]

i feel if it wa in the back or somwhere in the crown it wouldnt matter, or even if the hair in between it was 4a it wouldnt look so drastic. im just worried about how its gonna look when it grows out

I definitely think it will begin to look better as it grows out because it will start to hang differently. I too have those stubborn "wack patches" so styles that I'm loving right now are twists and twist-outs. These styles keep me from getting frustrated with my hair. Everything will be ok as time goes on.

 

[cluelezz]

I have 3c-ish hair in the front and the rest is 4a-ish. I figured out how to work with mine, but I do still have times when I hate it. If I wear a wng, I put heavier product on the 4 hair, lighter product on the 3 hair so they blend better. As time goes on, I think you'll figure out your own way of dealing with yours.

 

[RocStar]

at the title of this thread.

 

[whiteoleander91]

The curls in the front are tighter than the rest of my hair so it looks kinda mullet-ish without a headband haha it's better now than it was a few months ago...I figure I will be able to ditch the headbands soon :3 but the nape! daaaang son! I thought it was heat damage, very small waves that look like they should coil when dry but they don't so it looks very heat damaged and limp. I've never seen this before. It hangs like a tail...thing lol It looks weird! Plus the hair in the back has always grown faster than anywhere else. Headbands are my bff right now :/

 

[NappyNelle]

Don't be scared of how your hair will look. It will be easier to blend and style all of the textures as your hair continues to grow. Just nurture your hair to the best of your ability and you will love the result. You'll be able to do more than just twists when you are comfortable.

I agree with RocStar regarding the title of the thread; I can't tell if you're actually upset with the texture or not. However, acceptance of your hair texture(s) will hopefully come with time. How long is your hair now?

Paging Nonie, Iluvsmuhgrass, Msmchy, Amoreofcurls, westNDNbeauty, bride91501 to encourage you. These are just a few posters that style their hair and are committed to keeping it health. Some have mixed textures, others have a single one. I hope the beauty of their hair will help you see the beauty of yours.

 

[greenandchic]

I have 3c-ish hair in the front and the rest is 4a-ish. I figured out how to work with mine, but I do still have times when I hate it. If I wear a wng, I put heavier product on the 4 hair, lighter product on the 3 hair so they blend better. As time goes on, I think you'll figure out your own way of dealing with yours.

That's pretty much what I have to do. I'm finally able to wear wash-n-gos with the two+ curl patterns I have on my head (3c front | 4a back) with a little work.

 

[Iluvsmuhgrass]

I have two wack patches. The 4b is at the crown and the 3c at the nape. It doesn't look bad if you know how to finagle it. I have the prettiest coils around my ears and a few scattered everywhere else lol. The rest has a mind of it's own lol. I still love it though.

I can kind of understand where you're coming from because it can be frustrating and intimidating.... but you just have to have patience and experiment. For instance, I was a walking frizzball today. I decided to do some deep treatments first with Nexxus Emergencee (LOVE) and then Giovanni Deep whatever it is (not a fan. I love the direct leave in so much better.) After I rinsed it all out, I had the prettiest coils (albeit different sizes lol) that ranged from 1/14 of an inch up to 1/4 of an inch. I have some hair that won't coil at all..... it's a weird straight or wavy pattern.... and it grows that way from the scalp. (not heat damage)

Be encouraged! Work what you've got!! Don't worry about how many textures you have. Embrace it and learn how to work with it! There are sooooo many styling options on YT. Whatever style you choose, take it and make it yours!

 

[somewhereinbtwn]

Melody.Monroe I think you just coined a new lhcf term. Anyway my wack patch is in the middle of nape it's way looser than the rest of my hair, and looks like a tail. I don't really mind tho, it is what it is.

 

[MsLi@512]

my whole head is 4b, so I guess i have an entire whack head of hair !

 

[lesedi]

my whole head is 4b, so I guess i have an entire whack head of hair !

 

[Curlykale]

That's pretty much what I have to do. I'm finally able to wear wash-n-gos with the two+ curl patterns I have on my head (3c front | 4a back) with a little work.

The same thing happens to me, I use twice the amount of product on my 4a patches. This is more to make my hair "feel" evenly hydrated, since I wear braidouts all the time.

 

[miss cosmic]

i came in here thinking i'd found a kindred spirit. i don't hate hate my hair, i just hate it. 4c, no curl, no shine, dry as a really really dry thing....*sigh*

 

[reeko43]

I think it is just the mixture and where the mixture is that bothers people. I would actually prefer that my hair be one texture no matter where it lands on the number or alphabet scale. The more my hair grows out, the more I am starting to remember the problems I had styling my hair before I had a perm. My hair is very loose starting in the nape for about 2 - inches. I have a patch of hair that is probably 4b at least at the crown that is dense and has the most shrinkage. The hair on the sides and top are a texture somewhere in the middle. Dry, my hair looks like a big straw hat with the shrunken middle and hair fanning out on the sides. I am still transitioning so I can only imagine the problems I will have styling my hair. My braid/twistouts already look nightmarish once humidity hits cause the crown shrinks so bad and the rest just droops. Back in the day I wore my hair pressed so other than detangling, it wasn't a big deal.

 

[lilyofthenile]

That's the back and the sides for me. I find that as my hair grows longer it blends with my hair better, also I find that twists and stretching my hair conceals the difference well.. Chin up, it gets better.

 

[Melody.Monroe]

ITA with these statements. It doesnt matter if your hair is 1a or 4b...its the difference in the textures and having to care for more than one at the same time that makes it a WACK PATCH. It just won't cooperate with the majority of your hair...

I think it is just the mixture and where the mixture is that bothers people. I would actually prefer that my hair be one texture no matter where it lands on the number or alphabet scale. The more my hair grows out, the more I am starting to remember the problems I had styling my hair before I had a perm. My hair is very loose starting in the nape for about 2 - inches. I have a patch of hair that is probably 4b at least at the crown that is dense and has the most shrinkage. The hair on the sides and top are a texture somewhere in the middle. Dry, my hair looks like a big straw hat with the shrunken middle and hair fanning out on the sides. I am still transitioning so I can only imagine the problems I will have styling my hair. My braid/twistouts already look nightmarish once humidity hits cause the crown shrinks so bad and the rest just droops. Back in the day I wore my hair pressed so other than detangling, it wasn't a big deal.

 

[Iluvsmuhgrass]

my whole head is 4b, so I guess i have an entire whack head of hair !

No ma'am. Having a mix of everything under the sun on one scalp equates to patches that don't/can't/won't act right = wack patches.

EDTA: For me, it's the mix of textures and keeping them all happy.

 

[Ms. Martina]

I have a combo of my dad and mom's two hair textures. My dad's hair has frizzy/cottony loose waves, and my mom has curls. I agree that having a "whack patch" in the crown is even worse! I have a "whack patch" in my crown like the other poster. That area isn't curly...it is wavy. The rest of my hair is curly. Braid outs and etc don't make the hair match either. The two textures are too different and even doing a braid out makes them still look different. I'm just looking forward to it getting long. Perhaps it might look more blended when the hair on the bottom is covered by the crown layer, IDK. Don't feel bad, ther are many of us out there with "wack patches." I think it is more common than not actually.

 

[Oasis]

i'm not aware of my hair type (dry, brittle, tangle-prone) but i hate it too. don't really care who's mad.*shrugs*

 

[greenandchic]

The same thing happens to me, I use twice the amount of product on my 4a patches. This is more to make my hair "feel" evenly hydrated, since I wear braidouts all the time.

I use more products on the back and the "whack patch" to keep from breaking off my hair when I detangle than the front for sure. It also takes more time to detangle the patch (which is almost curl free, but very wiry and tangled) than the rest of my hair.

 

[pookaloo83]

at the title of this thread.

What you be shaking your head and rolling eyes of she said I hate my 3c hair? It's just a title and it's how she feels. Geez.

 

[Nonie]

miss cosmic, do not make me reach for my big stick and use it on you That's all. (This is my adopted small sis, folks, so she knows why I'm on her case...and if she doesn't, I'll explain it as I whoop her in person.)

NappyNelle I have one texture all through so I have no experience with dealing with many textures. I'm also not too worried about what people think so if doing a cornrow mohawk is what would make it work, I'd do it even if I were the only person doing it: Cornrow the sides going up (those should hold well for days) and wear a WNG up top where the hair is looser. Folks seem to ooh and aah at styles as soon as some celeb wears them, yet it's something that someone on a mission to solve a problem could've come up with if they would just learn to take care of #1 and worry about the haters later.

But L.Brown1114, I have read so many threads you've started and you seem so unhappy with your hair, texlaxed or natural; it's always something. I don't think you'll ever be happy until you come to terms with the fact that your hair will never be like anyone else's and accept that it's made of a mixture of types and then focus on learning from others what to do when you're dealt those cards. TBH I don't think you're being entirely honest if you say that you don't really hate 4B hair but just hate where it is. In Feb last year, you clearly got so upset because you couldn't fathom having an "afro for life"--which is what you believed your hair was good for--per your mom's prediction.

my mother just told me that my hair looks JUST like my father's and how when it grew out it still stayed thick and afro like and you never get a chance to see the curls because of the thickness. im freakin out cuz i'm not lookin to have no afro for the rest of my life, this isnt the 70's. did anyone have a BC head like mine and can hopefully show me what it looks like now cuz i'm almost to the point of crying!

(Source)

I'm not sure what your reason for not relaxing straight is, as that may solve your problem of different textures. If you just don't care for straight hair, have you considered a curly perm? Nothing you do short of chemically altering your hair or surgically getting implants will make it look differently from how it grows out of your head. I guess you could also straighten it till it doesn't revert. The fact that you've yo-yo'd between being texlaxed and being natural clearly shows you're rushing into things w/o first finding out if they will work as you hoped. Texlaxing your hair will not necessarily change the size of the coils unless you get closer to fully straight...so you'll still have different "textures", small waves where coils were small, larger ones where they were large. You seemed thrilled with having relaxed edges and natural the rest in this thread so I feel you would be happy with relaxed hair. You probably should just do your homework and make sure you know what you're getting into so you can stop the apparent indecisiveness if you really want long hair. Otherwise, short cuts can look nice on people too and you can get to change up whenever you feel like it w/o sacrificing a journey to achieve long hair.

Bottom line: there's a feeling of freedom that comes when you do what YOU WANT to do and quit worrying about what other people think. I suspect you feel like you'll be a sell out if you relax fully. I've had the impression that the world of natural hair has always been scary to you because it's one you don't know, which is understandable. And learning anything takes time and commitment so just do what you can afford to make time for now...and then worry about venturing into the unknown when you have the time and patience for it. You'll have a lot of support whatever you decide.

 

[Lynnerie]

I don't understand why anyone would continue on a natural journey if they aren't happy with their hair type. It is what it is and it can't be changed unless you heat-train, texturize, or slap a relaxer on it.

Sure everyone has days when they aren't feeling their hair but if everyday is a struggle you need to consider some other options for your hair and mental health. OP I hope you come to a conclusion of what to do for yourself.

 

[SND411]

It hates you too