Transitioning and frustrated! Talk me off the relaxer cliff!

[Anonymous1]

Ahh! I'm getting fed up now. I just took down my sew in and want to give my hair a break from the weaves so I will be able to moisturize better and deep condition more. I just don't feel I can really moisturize and dc like I want to with a full sew in. I tried to flat iron my hair today and it's a mess. I have never done a successful braid out, twist out, or any other out. I hate to keep relying on people to cornrow my hair for me. Can someone give me some product recs and tips for braidouts. I think i've watched every youtube video. What am I doing wrong?

My hair is sooo dry. Maybe i need to switch moisturizers? Any recommedations? I think I am 4a

 

[MsLauren]

Back away from the creamy crack!!!

But seriously, everything you described was EXACTLY what I went through when I was transitioning. I could never do any successful styles (braidouts, twist outs, etc), my hair was ridiculously dry, and breaking off everywhere. Here were my solutions:

For braidouts and twist outs I watched Ulovemegz on youtube and I switched over to more all natural products. My hair didn't like any products with mineral oil, sulfates, parabans, silicones, heavy waxes, and ingredients like that. My favorite gel to do braid outs with was EcoStyler the olive oil version.

For the dryness I bought a steamer and that solved all my dryness problems. I would use it twice a week and saw results after just 3 uses. I used DevaCurl products and Giovanni products under my steamer. And for protein I used Redken Extreme but I don't use that product anymore because of the silicones.

And then I just got sick of transitioning and BC'd after 6 months. If that's not an option for you I hope some long term transitioners can chime in and help you.

If you have any more questions feel free to PM me and I can give you more details!

HTH. Good luck!

 

[MzSwift]

Step away from the hair!!
Put it away and come back to it later.
Start looking at natural hair inspiration photos and videos.

That's what's worked for me to stay away from the clippers/scissors.

Also, when you do your "out" styles, do you curl your permed ends?

 

[chrisanddonniesmommy]

Okay, step away from the cliff!

You have many options. As said previously, travel to Youtube and take some hints from other transitioners and naturals.

Can you bun? This hairstyle will keep your hands out of your hair while protecting it a bit. Also, if you can't yourself, maybe a friend or relative can braid or cornrow your hair during the Summer and/or you can wig it for a while so you can create a moisturizing/deep conditioning regimen to move you along. In addition, go to oyinhandmade.com and order their Hair Dew. It's the bomb for sure. It keeps my transitioning hair moisturized for at least two days with a good oil (e.g. olive, coconut). In fact, use it lightly with a olive and coconut oil mixture.

I'm here to help. Feel free to pm me.

 

[whiteoleander91]

I had a hard time doing braid-outs/twist-outs as well. It was to the point that I didn't think I would be able to transition. Came across a woman who wore a bun throughout her entire transition and was like PERRRRFIK, that's what Imma do lol. So like another poster said, why not try bunning? A lot less drama if you ask me lol. Just make sure to keep up with DC'ing and protein treatments.

For dryness, I started cowashing more frequently, made sure to DC every single week (I should get back to this lol). Ummm...activator gels are pretty awesome, keeps my hair super soft and moisturized. I looove Worlds of Curls curl activator gel. S-Curl is pretty good, I also use Palmer's Olive Spray Oil (somethin' like dat lol) You can get it at Walmart for sure...and maybe Target? Smells really nice and makes my hair so soft. It does have cones though as does the S-Curl. If you don't mind cones, I would suggest trying Infusium 23 Moisture Replenisher conditioner (it has blue on the front), Aussie Moist 3 Minute Miracle Deeeeep Conditioner, and for an oil, maybe try an oil that is high in ceramides? I love safflower oil, it makes my hair smooth and feels more moisturized. For a light/medium-ish protein treatment, maybe try Giovanni Nutrafix Reconstructor, it's cone-free and awesome lol. Oh and stay away from the relaxer!!!!! You can do this!

 

[Shay72]

Also are you moisturizing on wet and dry hair? I moisturize on completely soaking wet hair and again later when it is completely dry. Try it.

 

[lamaria211]

Also are you moisturizing on wet and dry hair? I moisturize on completely soaking wet hair and again later when it is completely dry. Try it.

That sounds like an excellent idea. Im gonna try it myself

 

[Anonymous1]

Thanks for all of the responses ladies. I think part of my problem is I haven't been dc'ing every week because I've been in sew-ins. I bun sometimes but I don't want to ruin my hairline that is just starting to fill in. (had the follicle transplant surgery). I think i will start wearing my afro puff that i bought. And thanks for the idea of moisturizing on wet then dry hair.

Thanks ladies for all of the responses and I will take you up on the pm offer.