Those with Relaxers, do you have a stylist relax your hair?

[Latomian]

I've tried relaxing myself in the past and even with all the advice on here, I did more bad than good. I can't see the back of my head and I don't live around family nor do I have any friends sooo...yea. I underprocess and adding oil to my relaxer gave me a weird half-texturized thing that just led to tons of breakage.

I want to go back to see a stylist but the last 3 that I've had have been nightmares. What do I ask for?

I mean, I heard it was bad to flat iron on the day of the relaxer but what if I need it trimmed? Can you still get a good trim if you ask for a rollerset?

Is it okay if they blow-dry? (I relax about every 12-15 wks and only use indirect heat for rollersetting).

Can I ask them about overlapping the relaxer? Should I protect my ends myself before going in?

I just want to keep my hair in the best shape possible WHILE going to a stylist since history has shown that I jack my own hair up.

If you see a stylist, how do you keep your hair in its optimal state since it's not your own hands in your head?

I'm still very green about all this stuff. It's a lot to digest.

 

[Prose Princess]

I'm nearing the end of my first relaxer stretch and yes, I do plan on continuing to see my stylist. I'm not letting her trim it though because if I do that I'll walk out of there back at neck length again. Unless your ends are to' up from the flo' up and you don't think you can cut whatever splits you have yourself, I wouldn't suggest asking for a trim, especially if it's a new stylist because I know you don't want any setbacks.

I think protecting the relaxed parts of your hair yourself by putting conditioner or oil on them before you go in is a great idea, especially if you're not sure if your stylist is going to know what she's doing or not. In my case, I know my stylist does the best she can not to overlap (it was nearly impossible before though because I was going in every 6 weeks), but if you're going to a stylist you're not familiar with you should definitely throw it out there that you don't want them to overlap your hair, just do it in the most polite way possible since you don't want to piss them off or anything.

In terms of blowdrying, I'm not really sure about that but I would think it would be bad since your hair is usually pretty vulnerable right after a relaxer and that is considered direct heat. I don't know though, maybe someone else will be able to offer some better advice on that. HTH!

 

[amwcah]

I relax my own hair or have a friend/relative that I can trust do it for me.

You should research several stylist. Narrow your search to no more than five and ask for a free consultation. Discuss your concerns, questions, fears, etc. with them. Based on their responses and how they make you feel, you should be able to pick one or begin your search again. Think of finding a stylist like you would find a pediatrician for you cute little baby, dentist, ob-gyn, accountant, church, etc.

 

[locabouthair]

Did you try the half and half method? My relaxer didnt come out decent until I did that method.

I'm never letting a stylist relax my hair again. I've gotten horrible bald patches from them not washing out the relaxer properly.

 

[Poodlepizzared]

My sister is a stylist, so she does my hair every week. I usually get a relaxer every 12-16 weeks. I get it trimmed every time I get a relaxer and I only get rollersets. Use a protein conditioner mixed with some type of oil the week before a relaxer. Never get your hair flat ironed after a relaxer because it will break your hair off.

 

[TexturedTresses]

my stylist relaxes my hair. she listens to my instructions. my last relaxer, she did the mid protein step and i think trimmed very little.

 

[ajacks]

I want to go back to see a stylist but the last 3 that I've had have been nightmares. What do I ask for? Maybe you should have consultation appts. with a few stylists in your area and see if you can find one that you like.

I mean, I heard it was bad to flat iron on the day of the relaxer but what if I need it trimmed? Can you still get a good trim if you ask for a rollerset? The trim should come after the hair has been relaxed and since you want a rollerset the trim will probably be done on wet hair.

Is it okay if they blow-dry? (I relax about every 12-15 wks and only use indirect heat for rollersetting). I would not let the stylist use any direct heat.

Can I ask them about overlapping the relaxer? Definitely! It is your money and your head so ask them whatever you want.
Should I protect my ends myself before going in? Definitely!

I just want to keep my hair in the best shape possible WHILE going to a stylist since history has shown that I jack my own hair up.

If you see a stylist, how do you keep your hair in its optimal state since it's not your own hands in your head? Fortunately I have a stylist that I trust completely, and we have open communication with one another.

 

[Dposh167]

I mean, I heard it was bad to flat iron on the day of the relaxer but what if I need it trimmed? Can you still get a good trim if you ask for a rollerset? I NEVER heard this before. My stylist has been relaxing my hair for 10 years...and she always relaxes - rollersets - blow drys - trims -and flat irons...all in that order. she only trims on dry hair. I would murder her if she did it on wet hair anyway! (but i trim my own now anyhoo) I never got damage when direct heat was used on the same day as a relaxer. I was more damaging to my hair than that process

Is it okay if they blow-dry? (I relax about every 12-15 wks and only use indirect heat for rollersetting). again...my stylist uses direct heat on my hair during relaxing. i don't see any reason why you couldn't

Can I ask them about overlapping the relaxer? Should I protect my ends myself before going in? DEFINITELY!...talk to them prior to your relaxer about it. And definitely use something to protect your hair and ends before the relaxer. My stylists unfortunately overlaps my relaxers sometimes. thank gosh it hasn't caused any damage...but i've brought it up to her before.


If you see a stylist, how do you keep your hair in its optimal state since it's not your own hands in your head? well see...i only go to my stylist on relaxer day (every 17 weeks)....so after that day..i'm on my own. I refuse to go see a stylist often if i'm gonna continue to be on this board. it just doesn't make sense to me to be here if i'm gonna leave it all up to another person. that's just my opinion.

 

[SmartyPants]

I've tried relaxing myself in the past and even with all the advice on here, I did more bad than good. I can't see the back of my head and I don't live around family nor do I have any friends sooo...yea. I underprocess and adding oil to my relaxer gave me a weird half-texturized thing that just led to tons of breakage.

Same here... one burn too many and I gave up trying to self-relax. Plus, the no-lye relaxers were drying my hair out and I am not retarded enough to put a lye relaxer in my own hair.

I want to go back to see a stylist but the last 3 that I've had have been nightmares. What do I ask for?

You must be comfortable with your stylist. I recommend two things. First, go to the stylist sub-board on this site and ask for recs for stylists in your area. The women on these boards hold nothing back so they will give you the truth. Second, before letting a new stylist go anywhere near my head with a relaxer, I always go in twice for wash-and-sets and pick their brain about their hair care practices. You can learn a lot about a stylist before they ever touch your hair with a chemical process.

I mean, I heard it was bad to flat iron on the day of the relaxer but what if I need it trimmed? Can you still get a good trim if you ask for a rollerset?

Every stylist I have ever had trimmed after the relaxer while my hair was still wet, then rollerset. And yes, I think it is a bad idea to flat iron the day you get a relaxer--you want your hair as strong as possible before you put a chemical designed to break you hair down on it.

Is it okay if they blow-dry? (I relax about every 12-15 wks and only use indirect heat for rollersetting).

Many stylist do blow dry; but I have a strict NO DIRECT HEAT policy for my hair. If they try to pressure me into a blow-dry and curl or flat iron, I don't sit in their chair.

Can I ask them about overlapping the relaxer? Should I protect my ends myself before going in?

I usually base my own scalp before I go in for a relaxer because, frankly, I trust myself to do it best. I never protect my ends, but that's only because the person who does my relaxers is good about not overlapping relaxers.

I just want to keep my hair in the best shape possible WHILE going to a stylist since history has shown that I jack my own hair up.

If you see a stylist, how do you keep your hair in its optimal state since it's not your own hands in your head?

Since joining LHCF, the only time I see a stylist is for my relaxers and a trim every six or so months. The rest of the time I take care of my own hair. My mom and I were cracking up the other day because we both went in for a relaxer and our stylist was marveling about how much progress I have made with my hair--as if she had something to do with it!

I'm still very green about all this stuff. It's a lot to digest.

 

[Determined22]

I self-relax.

I found that with my stretching, the stylist I was going to was not relaxing my hair enough and I was underprocessed, so I'd have to do my own correctives at home. I decided to save myself the $$$ and aggravation. Plus, I can also do my henna gloss and be as gentle with my hair as I like.

 

[DarkHair]

I do go to a stylist to get my hair relaxed. She does really well. I just have a problem with her 'wanting' to trim my ends and the charge of $15 in addition to what I'm already paying.

I stopped doing my own because I didn't want to have overlapping and underprocessing. Heck I was told when I was younger that the pain from burning was a 'no pain, no gain' type thing. Lawd hamercy.

 

[Simply_Kelz]

I self-relax, too. It gets easier everytime. The first time was pretty rough though. All in all, if I mess my hair up, I'll be devastated, but if I pay someone else to mess my hair up, I'll be devastated, pissed, regretful, etc.

 

[ajacks]

My stylist has been relaxing my hair for 10 years...and she always relaxes - rollersets - blow drys - trims -and flat irons...all in that order. she only trims on dry hair.

WOW, she uses indirect heat followed by two direct heat sources.
Trimming on dry hair is fine, but my hair would never hold up to that much heat. Well you hair looks nice so I guess it works for you.

 

[Musicachic]

WOW, she uses indirect heat followed by two direct heat sources.
Trimming on dry hair is fine, but my hair would never hold up to that much heat. Well you hair looks nice so I guess it works for you.

Yeah my lady pretty much does the same thing. She will put conditioner on my hair. I will set under the dryer a little while. She rinses it out. Then she will blow dry and then flat iron some and then use a curling iron to slightly curl the ends. She puts in various products along the way that are probably protectants I assume. I leave the envy of the shop... :locks: It works for me, but probably not everyone. I have never gotten a rollerset at a salon. Maybe that is why I suck at them myself... Haha...

 

[Dposh167]

WOW, she uses indirect heat followed by two direct heat sources.
Trimming on dry hair is fine, but my hair would never hold up to that much heat. Well you hair looks nice so I guess it works for you.

u know what..it seems like a lot when u read it....but the process really isnt that bad. She only blow dries the roots to get the dent fron the rollers out. And thats just a 4 min process since my roots are straight from the perm already. Then the flat iron she just needs to pass over once to get it silky. And thats it. Its really quick. I dont want people to think im literally going thru a dominican blow out process on relaxer day....but yea i guess it depends on how good ur stylist is and careful they are.

 

[Butterfly08]

I go to my stylist for a relaxer, ALWAYS. It took some trial and error to find a great one but I love, love, love her. I see you're in Florida - she's in Pensacola at the Dillard's (Cordova Mall). I actually drive 3 hours to see her. (It doesn't hurt that there's an outlet less than an hour away. ) So me and DD make a whole day of it, girl's day out.

I went from 7 relaxers and 4 color touch ups to 3 relaxers and 3 color touch ups, starting this year. So I maintain my hair in the meantime with rollersetting, wet buns, etc. Honestly, I'd rather let the professionals handle the chemicals. I have messed up my hair before trying to color it and it's just better for me to let someone do it who knows what they're doing.

It takes some trial and error to find a good one but that's what I'd recommend until you learn how to better handle the chemicals.

 

[vestaluv1]

I self-relaxed for the longest time, but have switched to having my realxer done by a stylist. If you can find a good stylist I think this is probably the best option. I used no lye at home for fear of damage with lye, but it dried and damaged my hair badly any how so now I get a lye relaxer at the salon... my hair feels much better now.

I mean, I heard it was bad to flat iron on the day of the relaxer but what if I need it trimmed? Can you still get a good trim if you ask for a rollerset?
My stylist relaxes my hair, then does a light protein treatment, followed by a blow dry, saran wrap, (trim, if I want one) and flat iron.
I figure, since I'm only getting a relaxer twice a year, this is fine. Besides, I don't like rollersets .
If you prefer a rollerset, she should trim your hair after it has been washed, while it is still wet.

Is it okay if they blow-dry? (I relax about every 12-15 wks and only use indirect heat for rollersetting).
IMO, I should think it was ok as long as the stylist does the relaxer correctly and doesn't overprocess the hair or overlap. I would be a bit weary about doing this every 12 to 15 weeks though. Its only because I only want to relax every 24 weeks, I will allow the stylist to blow dry my hair after relaxing.

Can I ask them about overlapping the relaxer? Should I protect my ends myself before going in? When I went to my stylist for the first time, I asked her about how she was going to apply the relaxer, just to make sure she wasn't going to stretch it to the ends and/or overlap. It's your hair, and you're paying for the service so ask all the questions you want.
You can oil your ends or something to protect them before you go the your stylist if you want to... a good idea, especially if its a stylist you've never been to before.

If you see a stylist, how do you keep your hair in its optimal state since it's not your own hands in your head?
This is why I only go to the stylist twice a year for a relaxer. I don't like the fact that my hair is in someone elses hands.
I detangle my own hair before my stylist bases MY WHOLE SCALP. I'm not sure why some people still only base the hairline .
Just communicate with your stylist to let them know what you want... AND DON'T WANT!

Good luck!

 

[*fabulosity*]

I only allow a professional to touch my head with "poizon quimicals"... That being said, I have been lucky enough to not have any perm related incidents... (out of the incidents I have had). I try to go to quality stylists which is prolly why I'm paying upwards of 85 for a touch up. But it beats starting over from scratch. I really don't tell them anything, they usually note my texture .. and my hair is finer so it can't be in there all day. Good luck!

 

[WriterGirl]

I've never tried relax my own hair. I'm too scurred. My mom self-relaxed for years though. I don't think she was doing it right though. Now she's found a stylist and her hair is now APL.

Self-relaxers who do it right have great hair--those who do it wrong--not so much.

 

[hillytmj]

Yes, I still go to a stylist for a relaxer. If I lived closer to mr mom, I would let her do it. I have two cousins who are nearby stylists, but I don't trust them because they don't believe in the LHCF. Therefore, I'm not gonna have them prove LHCF advice wrong by using bad haircare practices on my hair.

 

[WriterGirl]

I have two cousins who are nearby stylists, but I don't trust them because they don't believe in the LHCF. Therefore, I'm not gonna have them prove LHCF advice wrong by using bad haircare practices on my hair.

Don't believe in LHCF? WTH?

 

[camilla]

WOW, she uses indirect heat followed by two direct heat sources.
Trimming on dry hair is fine, but my hair would never hold up to that much heat. Well you hair looks nice so I guess it works for you.

WHAT IS THE PURPOSE OF ROLLER SETTING IF SHE USES A FLAT IRON AFTER MY STYLIST WASH ROLLERSET AND BLOW OUT ROOTS ONLY WHEN I START TO GET ALOT OF NG I DONT LET HER PU HEAT ON MY ENDS

 

[ajacks]

WHAT IS THE PURPOSE OF ROLLER SETTING IF SHE USES A FLAT IRON AFTER MY STYLIST WASH ROLLERSET AND BLOW OUT ROOTS ONLY WHEN I START TO GET ALOT OF NG I DONT LET HER PU HEAT ON MY ENDS

I was thinking the same thing.

 

[Dposh167]

WHAT IS THE PURPOSE OF ROLLER SETTING IF SHE USES A FLAT IRON AFTER MY STYLIST WASH ROLLERSET AND BLOW OUT ROOTS ONLY WHEN I START TO GET ALOT OF NG I DONT LET HER PU HEAT ON MY ENDS

...well if it works for some then.....my stylist does it to create a silkier look when i leave the salon. The ends are left alone to keep the bump from the rollerset. its a process that only happens 3x a year. ive been doing it for years and Ive never had damage by it...

 

[jeabai]

I only go every 12 weeks but the stylist that I chose specializes in healthy hair care and was recommended by my sister. My av pic is the day that I relaxed.