Should I go back to this stylist? (kind of long!)

[Moisture2608]

Last week I visited a new stylist that I have never been to before. The reason I chose her was because she's the only one in my area that carries some UBH products that I like. So, I figured I'd try her out on my hair since she actually uses the UBH products in her salon.

Now, let me give you a little background about my hair ~~ In August 2007, I cut my hair completely off; I mean all of it. Before I cut it, it was about at ear length and it had some damage. When I cut it, I was basically bald. I figured I'd start all over and told myself that this time when my hair starts growing, I'd be more wise with it; It's very dry so I knew I'd have to baby it.

During this time (Aug. 2007 to April 2008) I have been just deep conditioning my hair and moisturizing it. I haven't put in any chemicals in it at all.

Sorry that I don't have any pictures, yet!!

So, last month ~ 8 months after I completely chopped my hair off, my hair was of course in it's natural 4b state. So, I had an engagement that I had to attend, so I put a mild relaxer in it just to get my hair to "sit down" a little bit. I didn't leave it in long, and frankly, I probably didn't even apply it right. Anyway, I found that I my hair had grown ALOT. I went from being "bald" to neck length hair! That's a lot of growth for me.

Since the time that I've put the home relaxer in my hair, I've been searching for a place to get a "real" relaxer, but also a place that actually CARES about hair. So, when I found this salon in my area that sells UBH products, I decided to go to her for my hair. But, I decided that I wouldn't let her put a relaxer on my hair during my first visit.

So, last week, I went in and really was just there to check her out. I asked to just get a wrap... well, the best she can do with a wrap, considering that my hair is basically in its virgin state (since my home relaxer was not applied properly). So, during my visit at this salon, the stylist informed me that my ends are very dry (which I figured). Then she said that next time when I come to get my relaxer, she's either going to have to CUT my dry ends off or relax them out. She actually had mentioned cutting my ends a few times during my visit!!!! And, it's funny that she never mentioned that I had split ends (which I probably do); she just kept saying how dry my ends are.

I really don't want my hair cut, trimmed, etc.....yet! In June, when I get my relaxer, I just want a relaxer. Plus, since I don't know this lady very well, I don't want her cutting on my hair.

My appointment is in a couple of weeks, and I'm starting to have second thoughts. I really believe that this stylist is going to insist on cutting my dry ends off, and not follow my wishes.

What do you all think? Should I go back to this stylist?

 

[indefinite]

Did you like how she did your hair? If so, go back, but INSIST on not getting it cut.

Another option is to buy your own UBH products and take them to another stylist.

 

[Lady Esquire]

Were you happy with your first visit? Is it possible to visit her again before the relaxer?

If you like her, call her ahead of time, and make it clear to her .
Also if you return, apply some conditioner, oil, cholesterol, vaseline or something to coat the last inch or two (or more).

Also, if possible, about 3 days before the relaxer, do both an intense protein, followed by a moisture treatment, then straighten your hair, and keep the ends nice and smooth until the day of the relaxer.

 

[Moisture2608]

My first visit with her was fine. She managed to do a nice wrap, and I left happy with my hair. Frankly, I really didn't care about the style that she was going to do for my hair; I was just there to see what she could do, the type of person she was, and the type of salon and people that come there. But, she did good on my hair especially with my rather natural hair. She has nice attitude, etc.

I'm just worried about when I go to get my relaxer. I suppose I could call her and let her know before time that I do not, under any circumstances, want scissors on my head.

The only thing that bothers me about doing that is this (and it probably has to do with bad experiences with other hair dressers) ~ even if I let her know that I don't want my hair cut at all, once I get in her chair, I'm afraid that she just won't listen to me and just try to convince me that the cut needs to happen (I've seen many stylists do this). OR, and this also bothers me ~ she could "mock" my decision not to have my hair trimmed and have every customer in there laughing at/mocking me. I know it seems silly. But, I've seen upset stylists who can't get their way start talking loud and saying - "Girl, can you believe she don't want to get her ends trimmed?" Just stuff like that. It's annoying, cause my hair is personal to me, and I should be able to choose what I want done to my hair. I'm not afraid, but at the same time, I don't have time for all that drama; it's like ~ "grow up, please; it's my hair, and I said that I don't want my hair cut, so don't cut it; it's that simple". But, in real life salons, sometimes it's just not that cut and dry.

 

[Fine 4s]

My first visit with her was fine. She managed to do a nice wrap, and I left happy with my hair. Frankly, I really didn't care about the style that she was going to do for my hair; I was just there to see what she could do, the type of person she was, and the type of salon and people that come there. But, she did good on my hair especially with my rather natural hair. She has nice attitude, etc.

I'm just worried about when I go to get my relaxer. I suppose I could call her and let her know before time that I do not, under any circumstances, want scissors on my head.

The only thing that bothers me about doing that is this (and it probably has to do with bad experiences with other hair dressers) ~ even if I let her know that I don't want my hair cut at all, once I get in her chair, I'm afraid that she just won't listen to me and just try to convince me that the cut needs to happen (I've seen many stylists do this). OR, and this also bothers me ~ she could "mock" my decision not to have my hair trimmed and have every customer in there laughing at/mocking me. I know it seems silly. But, I've seen upset stylists who can't get their way start talking loud and saying - "Girl, can you believe she don't want to get her ends trimmed?" Just stuff like that. It's annoying, cause my hair is personal to me, and I should be able to choose what I want done to my hair. I'm not afraid, but at the same time, I don't have time for all that drama; it's like ~ "grow up, please; it's my hair, and I said that I don't want my hair cut, so don't cut it; it's that simple". But, in real life salons, sometimes it's just not that cut and dry.

It sounds like you just don't want to go and I say follow your instincts don't force it.

There are tons of good stylists out there that would accept you bringing your own products to the salon. Buy your UBH products and go somewhere else. Look at the stylist dead in her/his eyes and say "I take care of my own hair and I'm very satisfied with the outcome. If I do not want you to [in this case] trim my ends, it's not up for debate. I've heard great things about you so I trust that you will respect my wishes." Period. I learned that the behavior you mentioned above often comes as a result of how 'comfortable' the stylist is with you. Keep it 'businessy' and they will straighten up...a wee bit erplexed