Opinions needed about my disagreement...

[mscounselor]

with my mother. I had a stylist in South Florida for almost 10 years of my life. The only problem now is that she believes my transition to natural is a waste of time. She seemed supportive on the phone but was different the day I went to visit. My mom still goes to her because she is very good at relaxers and maintaining healthy relaxed hair.
Here is the disagreement. Ever so often I want to go to the stylist to get my hair cut and maybe a deep condition. I dont want to go back to her because of her view about my hair, but my mom says differently.
My mom feels that as long as I tell her what I want to do, she will do it.

If she isn't supportive of it, why would I do that?

Whats your opinion.

 

[Poohbear]

It's all about what you feel comfortable doing.

Your mom may feel comfortable going to the stylist if she was the one transitioning...

But since you are not comfortable with going to the stylist who is not supportive of your decision, then don't go to her.

But if she is a good stylist and will do what you ask her to do, then I do not see a problem with it, regardless of what she thinks of my decision to go natural or not...

:scratchch Hmmm, it's kinda confusing if you think about it... sorry if I confused you even more!

 

[BrwnSugaBabee]

IMO, if she can't be supportive of your hair goals you should not support her (financially). It is your choice what to do with your hair. What if you go to her and she starts downtalking your choice and continously offers to relax your hair. I think you should try to surround yourself with people who contribute positively to your hair journey.

 

[Caramela]

Who cares what she thinks? If that's what YOU want to do, go for it! Stylists are a "waste of time" in my opinion. Either do all of you natural hair maintenance yourself (best option!!) or find a supportive knowledgeable stylist. I promise you, that won't be hard to find.

 

[Poohbear]

Who cares what she thinks? If that's what YOU want to do, go for it! Stylists are a "waste of time" in my opinion. Either do all of you natural hair maintenance yourself (best option!!) or find a supportive knowledgeable stylist. I promise you, that won't be hard to find.

Yeah! What Caramela said!

 

[MizaniMami]

I feel what the other girls are saying but at the same time you known this lady for 10 years. Finding a stylist is like finding another man; you have to play stuff by ear, you never know how many people she hurt in the past, and you never know if they are just in it for the money.

I say stick it out with her. Talk to her. Maybe she then will be supportive. I agree with your mom. It's hard finding a stylist you trust.

 

[leleepop]

IMO, if she can't be supportive of your hair goals you should not support her (financially). It is your choice what to do with your hair. What if you go to her and she starts downtalking your choice and continously offers to relax your hair. I think you should try to surround yourself with people who contribute positively to your hair journey.

I agree with BSB because when your are going through a transition sometimes you loose sight of the big picture, and that is when someone who doesnt even understand can JACK UP all the months and years of hard earned progress. If you think she feels tryna go natural is a waist of time she probably will resent doing you hair. It doesnt sound like she is used to doing natural and that is going to be a problem. I would be honest with her and tell her EXACTLY how I feel to see if she is willing to take the necessary steps to accomidate you needs and if not than I would thank her for the years of service ,which should be appreciated,and I would try to find someone who can. hth O yeah about Moms well I love my Mom dearly but I learned that the decisions that she makes for herself are not always the right decisions for me.

 

[mscounselor]

Some of her decisions are just interesting. When I first went back to her for a hair cut after trying to get a texturizer, I asked her what type of rollers she would recommend for roller setting. She told me no, I should blow dry because of the two different textures in my hair. (and thats it!!) Whatever. I know how to detangle my hair and wont have to worry about excessive heat to manage it.
It seems that I need to call Natural Trend Setters and see what they are about.

 

[leleepop]

Some of her decisions are just interesting. When I first went back to her for a hair cut after trying to get a texturizer, I asked her what type of rollers she would recommend for roller setting. She told me no, I should blow dry because of the two different textures in my hair. (and thats it!!) Whatever. I know how to detangle my hair and wont have to worry about excessive heat to manage it.
It seems that I need to call Natural Trend Setters and see what they are about.

I agree because she is used of working with chemically relaxed hair and sounds like she is gonna try to work against what you are trying to accomplish which will probably lead to breakage. I would check NTS out and if they do something suspect then move on. I do think you should take control of whatever situation when it comes to your hair, so that way you will stay happy about the results. Believe me stylist will do whateva that want to do, if you dont speak up, and Im not doggin them but communication is key for the consumer to be happy.hth

 

[balisi]

You need a stylist who will support your hair goals without hesitation. Such a stylist must be knowledgeable, understanding and able to provide a number of styling options during and after your transition. She or he must also be sensitive and know when/if you're ready to BC. She/he must be patient, especially when it comes to detangling. This is even more important if you choose not to BC.

 

[mscounselor]

Balisi,
If I didn't live down here near the alligators, I would make an appointment once a month to come see you. You speak of exactly what Im looking for in a stylist.
My mom just doesnt' understand. The stylist would push products on me but not my mom. Its ok...my mom is now trying to rectify thining hair which she attributed to her age. NO- not always.
Im just venting...

 

[BrwnSugaBabee]

I'm sure everything will work out for you. I wish you much success with your transitioning!!

 

[Tee]

Some of her decisions are just interesting. When I first went back to her for a hair cut after trying to get a texturizer, I asked her what type of rollers she would recommend for roller setting. She told me no, I should blow dry because of the two different textures in my hair. (and thats it!!) Whatever. I know how to detangle my hair and wont have to worry about excessive heat to manage it.
It seems that I need to call Natural Trend Setters and see what they are about.

Looks like you have found your answer. Yahhhh!