Maybe I'm Wrong About My Hair... Haven't Been Retaining Length :-(

[Poohbear]

I'm beginning to think that flat-ironing is the cause of the many split ends throughout my hair. I flat-iron my hair about 6 or more times a year. I'm thinking this is too much and is wreaking havoc on my hair. I was thinking airdrying and wet styling my hair was the reason, but maybe not. These split ends cause breakage. The breakage has been hindering my length retention.

Before straightening my hair this last time, I did a search and destroy trim on my hair. I took sections of hair and cut off strands that were damaged and split. After doing this, I wore my hair in wet buns and a few wash n gos and got tired of these styles that I hate. So I decided to straighten it again. Even though I like the look of straightened hair, I started looking at my ends very closely again and BAM! ...Split ends that were not there after I did my trim awhile ago.

I am getting really frustrated because I have been armpit length since 2009. I can stretch a section of hair in the back to my brastrap, but I want my hair to fall at that length. So maybe I need to lay off flat-ironing and straightening for a long time.

I thought about doing a blowdrying routine with no flat-ironing, but I'm unsure about that now. When I blowdry, I use high heat because I do not have the patience with cool air.

Yesterday, I was listening to Torridiana777 on youtube, and she made some very good points about leaving your hair alone for it to retain length. She wears her natural hair in twists most of the time, and her hair is waist length when stretched.

So I've been thinking about keeping my hair in two strand twists for a long time until I reach my goals. However, her hair texture is looser than mine and she has less shrinkage, therefore, making it easier for her to keep up with a twist routine. But it's still no excuse. I know Ms Lala, whose hair texture is similar to mine, decided to lay off the heat and her hair flourished with wearing two strand twists consistently. I should've taken her advice after asking her about her regimen the first time.

So the next time I wash my hair, that's what I'm going to do... two strand twists. I just wish I had a nice uniform shape for twists. When I wear twists, they have all different types of lengths which I do not like. My hair shape looks pretty nice with blowouts and variations of twistouts, but not with twists when I wear them down. So I'll probably experiment with different twist styles and updos for my twists. Hopefully I can twist my hair in a way that will frame my face nicely.

Excuse my rambling... I'm just fed up and discouraged with my hair length. Each year, I feel like I'm starting at the beginning of my natural journey when it comes to length. Now I know that the splits and breakage have to be coming from flat-ironing my hair.

Wish me the best! My goals are BSL by December 2011 and WL by December 2013.

 

[Janet']

Poohbear...I understand your frustration. At least you know what the problem is and you are now ready to right the wrong. BSL in December is definitely do-able!!! I love your hair btw!

 

[LushLox]

Indeed if you see something is not working then you have to change it if it's hampering your progress. Unfortunately not everyone can use heat frequently - many of us suffer for it in the longer term, well it's that or you just need to trim more regularly.

I think the low manipulation idea is a good one, lord knows I really need to start doing that myself because my hand is always up in my hair.

Good luck!

 

[PPGbubbles]

I have come to the conclusion that my hair HATES direct heat. which sucks because I like heat styles

this is why I plan to lay off of heat and try more PS's with my own hair. I know my hair grows best when I leave it alone.

 

[mzteaze]

Poohbear

I understand the frustration. I am at my longest point and have learned from the ladies here that leaving my hair alone might be the best move to get past this point. The same with you - low manipulation and low-to-no heat might be the next best place to go.

I have decided that shrinkage is my best friend for now. Its always amazing that people don't realize how long your hair is until you let it down to play...lol. Shrinkage isn't a bad thing for now.

 

[curlicarib]

Blowdrying and flatironing are the debil to my hair. When I frist started my HHJ, back in August 2009, I did my last blowdry & flat Iron and went to the barbar and asked her to cut off ALL of the split ends. She took a rattail comb and showed me (on the tail end) how much she would have to cut to get all the split ends. I went from just past APL to SL. My siggy photo is about a month later. The day I cut my hair, I gave up the blowdryer and the flatiron. I've had almost no split ends since them. I keep my hair in either flat twists, regular twists or buns. Yes, it can get tedious, but for me, it's worth it for healthy, long hair.

Give them up, Girl! You will not regret it - if healthy hair is your goal.

 

[EllePixie]

I was thinking about this - I just flat ironed my hair a couple of days ago and got scared/annoyed with rain so I washed it today...usually, when my hair is curly and/or in twists, I'm moisturizing my hair everyday. However, when it's straight I can't do that - I can only use oil based products or my hair will revert. Do you think that might have something to do with it? Not exactly the ironing per se, but the lack of moisture when your hair is straight? How long do you leave it straight?

I could be wrong, but I don't think flat ironing six times a year is excessive in itself - it might also be that you're blowdrying + flat ironing...when I first ironed my hair I blowdried it and my hair felt terrible - it really hates being blowdried, even for a blow out. Now, when I iron I do twists or braids to let my hair air dry, then iron it like that, and it comes out soo much better.

Sorry I'm rambling but I'm just thinking while I type...

 

[EMJazzy]

Have you considered wearing a wig to help you achieve your hair goals?

Sent from my DROIDX using Long Hair Care Forum App

 

[PPGbubbles]

WOW OP I never saw this YTber before!

Torridiana777 she is awesome!

 

[Nonie]

@Poohbear, I have always believed that type 4 hair (particularly 4B) was never meant to be manipulated so much. When I look at the history of our hair, I see a people who used to have long hair. Maybe not booty-long, but long compared to what seems to be the norm these days. The one thing I see common in all is low manipulation. Not DCing, not oil-rinsing, not ayurveda...but leaving the hair alone. And I'm not referring to locs. I'm talking about wearing it in a style that can last a while so your hair isn't being bothered on a regular basis. Remember styling causes friction albeit minimal if you're gentle...but when you're dealing with one of the weakest types of hair, then that friction can be detrimental to retention.

I've often wondered if the obsession to change our style frequently mightn't have come from the West. Seems their hair can stand to be fussed with day-in, day-out, but not ours. I applaud you "listening to your hair" and hopefully your having found what might have been missing. But Hun, APL is such an awesome length that there are many who'd not ask for more...so enjoy it while it lasts.

A people whose low-mani hair regimen inspires me and confirms that our hair is happiest when left alone are the Himba people:

Even the kids have pretty long hair:

 

[Poohbear]

I was thinking about this - I just flat ironed my hair a couple of days ago and got scared/annoyed with rain so I washed it today...usually, when my hair is curly and/or in twists, I'm moisturizing my hair everyday. However, when it's straight I can't do that - I can only use oil based products or my hair will revert. Do you think that might have something to do with it? Not exactly the ironing per se, but the lack of moisture when your hair is straight? How long do you leave it straight?

I could be wrong, but I don't think flat ironing six times a year is excessive in itself - it might also be that you're blowdrying + flat ironing...when I first ironed my hair I blowdried it and my hair felt terrible - it really hates being blowdried, even for a blow out. Now, when I iron I do twists or braids to let my hair air dry, then iron it like that, and it comes out soo much better.

Sorry I'm rambling but I'm just thinking while I type...

EllePixie - I also use just oil on my straightened hair to keep it from reverting. No, I do not think it's lack of moisture. I have a different view on moisture than most people here. I feel like oils do moisturize keeping my hair soft and supple. Water dries out my hair type making it brittle. I think it's definitely flat-ironing.

If I can recall, before ever flat-ironing my natural hair, I never had split ends. Even when I had relaxed hair, I never had split ends. I also never used a flat iron when I was relaxed. I have blowdried with no problems at all. So I definitely think it's flat-ironing. And I flat-iron with grease. Even though it gives me a smooth sleek look for several weeks, I think it is scorching my ends.

If I do not get too bored with the straight look, I keep it straightened for 4-6 weeks before washing it again. I do not re-use heat at all. I also do not comb my hair at all. I just put my hair in a loose bun a night and then finger fluff in the mornings. And my hair does not feel dry and it does not look dry during the whole 4-6 weeks. The only reason I wash it is when I get buildup on my scalp.

 

[Poohbear]

Have you considered wearing a wig to help you achieve your hair goals?

Sent from my DROIDX using Long Hair Care Forum App

Good suggestion but I hate wigs! I thought about it, but I do not like the feel of wigs around my head. I also do not like how fake they look. That's just me. I just feel like I shouldn't have to hide my hair just to retain length either.

 

[Poohbear]

@Poohbear, I have always believed that type 4 hair (particularly 4B) was never meant to be manipulated so much. When I look at the history of our hair, I see a people who used to have long hair. Maybe not booty-long, but long compared to what seems to be the norm these days. The one thing I see common in all is low manipulation. Not DCing, not oil-rinsing, not ayurveda...but leaving the hair alone. And I'm not referring to locs. I'm talking about wearing it in a style that can last a while so your hair isn't being bothered on a regular basis. Remember styling causes friction albeit minimal if you're gentle...but when you're dealing with one of the weakest types of hair, then that friction can be detrimental to retention.

I've often wondered if the obsession to change our style frequently mightn't have come from the West. Seems their hair can stand to be fussed with day-in, day-out, but not ours. I applaud you "listening to your hair" and hopefully your having found what might have been missing. But Hun, APL is such an awesome length that there are many who'd not ask for more...so enjoy it while it lasts.

I agree with you Nonie. I have felt the same way about our hair type which is 4A/B, but have been going against the odds. I get bored with styles quickly and have manipulated my hair so much throughout the almost 6 years of being natural. I think my obsession to change my hair styles frequently comes from looking at pictures and videos of other people's hair.

 

[Prudent1]

You may be right about the flat iron+ heated grease. Put your theory to the test and do a length check in a couple of months. Maybe you can continue to search to find some PS that are different and new for and flattering on you. Don't get discouraged. You can make BSL by Dec.

 

[ms.blue]

I totally understand how you are feeling Poohbear. Maybe you could flatiron your hair 1-3 times a year instead of six. It is all about making goals and working to achieve them that matters so I hope you will make your goals of bsl and wsl.

 

[janeemat]

Yesterday, I was listening to Torridiana777 on youtube, and she made some very good points about leaving your hair alone for it to retain length. She wears her natural hair in twists most of the time, and her hair is waist length when stretched.

Dlewis is proof of this. She stated that she just leave miss hair alone. We all know that she has one of the most beautiful heads on hair on this board. Since you know what the culprit is, good luck! Your hair has always been nice.

 

[Golden75]

Not natural yet, but the only time my hair really flourished is when left alone, weaves or braids. So going back to no-mani styles too. Good luck Pooh! Glad you may have found your solution

 

[200AndOne]

Poohbear, do you do your two strand twists on wet or dry hair? I do not look the look of my 2 strand twists much either, but one thing that i've adopted recently that helps is to do them on dry hair. After letting my hair air dry in big twists or braids, I retwist by dampening my hair just a bit with water from a spray bottle. My doing them on just slightly damp hair, my twists are much fuller, have less shrinkage, and take on a shape that i like much more than doing them on wet hair. Not much, but HTH

 

[Mystic]

Maybe you should try to minimise the time spent looking at hairstyles if it causes you to manipulate your hair too much. I have looked through your album and seen sooooo many non-heat styles that are creative and beautiful. Maybe you should take a step back and embrace how luscious and beautiful your hair is; enjoy it where its at and try to minimise looking at other styles if that is causing you to manipulate your hair too much. I totally get what you are saying because I used to do the same thing but the minute I stopped being frustrated about my length, stopped obsessing about other people's hair texture, length, fast growth and hair beauty and started leaving my hair alone (primarily because I became so busy), that's the time I began to see length. I kid you not. I went from APL to BSL in 3 months and I was in absolute shock. That was the period I started my new job and was working my *** off - I had no time to look at other hairstyles or even worry too much about mine. Like Nonie said, it wasn't the D/C, washing, and frequent manipulation etc., all I did was leave it alone and it did its thing. I hope you will get to your ideal length real soon but in the meantime, please do not be frustrated. Your hair is too beautiful, and the length is great for you to be frustrated.

I agree with you @Nonie. I have felt the same way about our hair type which is 4A/B, but have been going against the odds. I get bored with styles quickly and have manipulated my hair so much throughout the almost 6 years of being natural. I think my obsession to change my hair styles frequently comes from looking at pictures and videos of other people's hair.

 

[Leeda.the.Paladin]

I'm beginning to think that flat-ironing is the cause of the many split ends throughout my hair. I flat-iron my hair about 6 or more times a year. I'm thinking this is too much and is wreaking havoc on my hair. I was thinking airdrying and wet styling my hair was the reason, but maybe not. These split ends cause breakage. The breakage has been hindering my length retention.

Before straightening my hair this last time, I did a search and destroy trim on my hair. I took sections of hair and cut off strands that were damaged and split. After doing this, I wore my hair in wet buns and a few wash n gos and got tired of these styles that I hate. So I decided to straighten it again. Even though I like the look of straightened hair, I started looking at my ends very closely again and BAM! ...Split ends that were not there after I did my trim awhile ago.

I am getting really frustrated because I have been armpit length since 2009. I can stretch a section of hair in the back to my brastrap, but I want my hair to fall at that length. So maybe I need to lay off flat-ironing and straightening for a long time.

I thought about doing a blowdrying routine with no flat-ironing, but I'm unsure about that now. When I blowdry, I use high heat because I do not have the patience with cool air.

Yesterday, I was listening to Torridiana777 on youtube, and she made some very good points about leaving your hair alone for it to retain length. She wears her natural hair in twists most of the time, and her hair is waist length when stretched.

So I've been thinking about keeping my hair in two strand twists for a long time until I reach my goals. However, her hair texture is looser than mine and she has less shrinkage, therefore, making it easier for her to keep up with a twist routine. But it's still no excuse. I know Ms Lala, whose hair texture is similar to mine, decided to lay off the heat and her hair flourished with wearing two strand twists consistently. I should've taken her advice after asking her about her regimen the first time.

So the next time I wash my hair, that's what I'm going to do... two strand twists. I just wish I had a nice uniform shape for twists. When I wear twists, they have all different types of lengths which I do not like. My hair shape looks pretty nice with blowouts and variations of twistouts, but not with twists when I wear them down. So I'll probably experiment with different twist styles and updos for my twists. Hopefully I can twist my hair in a way that will frame my face nicely.

Excuse my rambling... I'm just fed up and discouraged with my hair length. Each year, I feel like I'm starting at the beginning of my natural journey when it comes to length. Now I know that the splits and breakage have to be coming from flat-ironing my hair.

Wish me the best! My goals are BSL by December 2011 and WL by December 2013.

I think having coarser/kinkier hair makes twisting even easier because they seem to stay in longer. That's pretty much been my routine for the last 2 years or so. I do have coarse hair with a lot of shrinkage, so once I put in twists, I keep them in for 2-3 weeks at a time (depending).

Good luck on the new leg of your journey! I think taking a break from the heat will work wonders for you.

 

[Poohbear]

Poohbear, do you do your two strand twists on wet or dry hair? I do not look the look of my 2 strand twists much either, but one thing that i've adopted recently that helps is to do them on dry hair. After letting my hair air dry in big twists or braids, I retwist by dampening my hair just a bit with water from a spray bottle. My doing them on just slightly damp hair, my twists are much fuller, have less shrinkage, and take on a shape that i like much more than doing them on wet hair. Not much, but HTH

200AndOne - I like two strand twists done on dry hair, as in, blowdried hair. Not sure what your hair texture is, but when I airdry in big twists or braids, my hair is still not stretched out good enough. My hair is still shrunken. When my hair airdries in twists in braids, some of the strands matt together dry. I hate pulling apart these strands just to re-twist it. Even though I do not feel blowdrying my hair is bad, I am going to blowdry on COOL air next time I wash my hair to style in twists.

Also, I have a day job Monday through Friday 8 - 4:30. If I wash my hair during a week day after work one evening, I do not have time to airdry and then twist. My hair will still be wet in the morning. And some weekends, I may be out and about and may not have time to do my hair. But I will figure something out soon.

 

[Poohbear]

I think having coarser/kinkier hair makes twisting even easier because they seem to stay in longer. That's pretty much been my routine for the last 2 years or so. I do have coarse hair with a lot of shrinkage, so once I put in twists, I keep them in for 2-3 weeks at a time (depending).

Good luck on the new leg of your journey! I think taking a break from the heat will work wonders for you.

KCcurly,
I'm not talking about staying in longer when I mentioned she had it easier with twisting. I'm saying she has it easier as in separating, parting, and styling her hair because it's not tightly coiled like mine. Same with your hair. I've seen your pictures of beautiful two strand twists, but I'm sure it's easier for you because your hair texture is looser than mine. You and Torridiana do not have to worry about shrinkage and matting as much as I do. I have tiny pen spring size coils and kinks.

 

[Poohbear]

Maybe you should try to minimise the time spent looking at hairstyles if it causes you to manipulate your hair too much. I have looked through your album and seen sooooo many non-heat styles that are creative and beautiful. Maybe you should take a step back and embrace how luscious and beautiful your hair is; enjoy it where its at and try to minimise looking at other styles if that is causing you to manipulate your hair too much. I totally get what you are saying because I used to do the same thing but the minute I stopped being frustrated about my length, stopped obsessing about other people's hair texture, length, fast growth and hair beauty and started leaving my hair alone (primarily because I became so busy), that's the time I began to see length. I kid you not. I went from APL to BSL in 3 months and I was in absolute shock. That was the period I started my new job and was working my *** off - I had no time to look at other hairstyles or even worry too much about mine. Like Nonie said, it wasn't the D/C, washing, and frequent manipulation etc., all I did was leave it alone and it did its thing. I hope you will get to your ideal length real soon but in the meantime, please do not be frustrated. Your hair is too beautiful, and the length is great for you to be frustrated.

Mystic - You are right on! I do need to stop looking at others' hair and just focus on mine and just leave it be. Maybe I'm more obsessed with hair than I thought.

And wow @ reaching BSL from APL in 3 months! I hope I can do that! Did you leave your hair in twists too?

 

[Nonie]

I agree with you @Nonie. I have felt the same way about our hair type which is 4A/B, but have been going against the odds. I get bored with styles quickly and have manipulated my hair so much throughout the almost 6 years of being natural. I think my obsession to change my hair styles frequently comes from looking at pictures and videos of other people's hair.

Awww...I get bored too, @Poohbear which is why as much as I admire sisterlocks and locs, I could never commit to them for life because down the road I do want to see my hair loose w/o losing length I thought I had. But if that were not a problem, they'd be great because they are not boring. You can style them in so many ways for a fresh change whenever you feel like it.

Low mani doesn't have to be boring. Hair accessories including flowers, phony puffs, hats, wraps, wigs...can all help add fun to the styling.

Like if you decide to get twists, what could stop you from pulling off every style a relaxed person can do? You could set the hair, do braidouts, put the hair up in a variety of ways. In between redos, wear a twistout which you could style like you did the twists. The sky's the limit if you set your imagination free to become creative.

 

[Poohbear]

Awww...I get bored too, Poohbear which is why as much as I admire sisterlocks and locs, I could never commit to them for life because down the road I do want to see my hair loose w/o losing length I thought I had. But if that were not a problem, they'd be great because you can style them for a change.

Low mani doesn't have to be boring. Hair accessories, phony puffs, hats, wraps, wigs...can all help add fun to the styling.

Like if you decide to get twists, what could stop you from pulling off every style a relaxed person can do? You could set the hair, do braidouts, put the hair up in a variety of ways. In between redos, wear a twistout which you could style like you did the twists. The sky's the limit if you set your imagination free to become creative.

Nonie - it's the natural hair styles that I'm fascinated by... not relaxed styles. When I wear my hair straightened, it's just basically left down and not styled in any type of way. After 4 weeks, I may put it in a ponytail and that's it.

But yeah, I can see myself doing different styles with two strand twists.

I've also thought about locs a few years ago. I even tried to start locs and then took them out due to impatience and thinking about wanting to wear my hair in out styles.

 

[Leeda.the.Paladin]

KCcurly,
I'm not talking about staying in longer when I mentioned she had it easier with twisting. I'm saying she has it easier as in separating, parting, and styling her hair because it's not tightly coiled like mine. Same with your hair. I've seen your pictures of beautiful two strand twists, but I'm sure it's easier for you because your hair texture is looser than mine. You and Torridiana do not have to worry about shrinkage and matting as much as I do. I have tiny pen spring size coils and kinks.

Ah ok. Gotcha.

I do understand because the back of my hair is pretty much like that (Pen spring coils) I have gotten matting and a ton knots back there when I wear wash n gos ...which is why I stopped. And why I wash my hair in sections so it never really dries shrunken.

Anyway, I'm sure you will be at your length goals before you know it

 

[Vshanell]

Poohbear Heat definitely causes damage and splits but I wouldn't think 6 times a year would do much to hinder growth. Could it be your hair just naturally splits easily? I say this because I've always had that problem and I don't even use direct heat...haven't in a long time. My hair just splits for no reason....I'm sure of it because I've watched it closely for years. I can do a thorough S&D and get 90% of the splits but yet months later I have tons more. I've just accepted it now and I remove them as often as I can but try not to obsess about them because there isn't much else I can do.

My hair is fine and I feel fine hair is much more prone to splitting....is your hair fine?

I also changed all my combs to seamless so I could reduce any extra splitting from combs.

Oh and also frequent trimming, dusting and S&D'ing is so important for fine hair or hair that splits a lot. Before I found hair boards my ends were so damaged and split but I refused to trim and my hair never grew. I started doing micro-dustings lol, because I was scared to trim back then and even with such a small amount taken off every 3-4 months my hair started to retain! I learned the power of trimming at that point.

 

[Nonie]

@Nonie - it's the natural hair styles that I'm fascinated by... not relaxed styles. When I wear my hair straightened, it's just basically left down and not styled in any type of way. After 4 weeks, I may put it in a ponytail and that's it.

But yeah, I can see myself doing different styles with two strand twists.

I've also thought about locs a few years ago. I even tried to start locs and then took them out due to impatience and thinking about wanting to wear my hair in out styles.

Poohbear Then if you're looking for Natural Styles, look to Africa and see how natural hair is worn. Puffs and all other loose styles are also worn but more for special occasions. Most natural people cornrow, thread, single braids, twists, or shave their hair...etc So you don't have to imitate relaxed hair. I just threw that in there coz I see too often on the forum questions in search of "hangage", avoiding "shrinkage", etc...so I tend to think of how one can emulate those looks with natural hair--since after all, a lot people who were relaxed for years might feel more "at home" with those.

As far as puffs, phony puffs can do a good job of imitating life, so why not find some and ways to fake your dos while leaving your hair alone. Mook's Hair is a pro in low mani, fun and exciting dos. So stalk her. And if you really, really, really just want your scalp buried under big hair, get a full weave and go crazy with hair that isn't yours while your own is left in peace.

 

[Mystic]

I tried the weave thing and it worked. Braids, twist, whatever low manipulation styles can accomplish the same thing. Good luck!

@Mystic - You are right on! I do need to stop looking at others' hair and just focus on mine and just leave it be. Maybe I'm more obsessed with hair than I thought.

And wow @ reaching BSL from APL in 3 months! I hope I can do that! Did you leave your hair in twists too?

 

[g.lo]

Awww...I get bored too, @Poohbear which is why as much as I admire sisterlocks and locs, I could never commit to them for life because down the road I do want to see my hair loose w/o losing length I thought I had. But if that were not a problem, they'd be great because they are not boring. You can style them in so many ways for a fresh change whenever you feel like it.

Low mani doesn't have to be boring. Hair accessories including flowers, phony puffs, hats, wraps, wigs...can all help add fun to the styling.

Like if you decide to get twists, what could stop you from pulling off every style a relaxed person can do? You could set the hair, do braidouts, put the hair up in a variety of ways. In between redos, wear a twistout which you could style like you did the twists. The sky's the limit if you set your imagination free to become creative.

sorry to hijack your thread poobear, Nonie does wearing twistout 7 days a week a bad thing?

Pohbear i also agree with elle, i think lack of moisture must play a good part when the hair is flat iron!