I'm at "THAT POINT"...Now what?

[LadyBlu]

I'm sure I am not the only woman that reaches this crossroads..I am at about 12 weeks post, and due to the constant battle with maintaining healthy hair, I am seriously considering remaining natural and getting sisterlocks (a decision that has its own set of issues) or going back to my pre LHCF habits. I can't take it anymore!

Here are my issues:

1) Stretching is vital to maintaining healthy hair, but it gets so hard to maintain once you get past the 8 week mark.

2) I HATE doing my own hair. It takes too long, and it always ends up looking a hot mess, but anyone I pay to do it always ends up doing something to mess it up (chopping it off, overprocessing, etc).

3) I am not a big fan of weaves (ummm...that's why I want my OWN hair to grow out) and that's what's responsible for pulling out my hairline as it is, but at least I don't go around looking like I shot the sheriff. My hair is long, but it looks bad!

4) I have no choice but to wear wigs right now because I don't have the time or energy to do my own hair, but I just feel wierd in wigs. I feel like everyone KNOWS it's not my hair and they think I'm one of "those girls" who can't grow hair and I'm forced to wear a wig because I don't have much hair of my own. Actually, I have thick SL hair, it's just so unmanageable.

5) Any growth aids RUIN my skin! Bitotin breaks me out, BT breaks me out, MTG broke me out... I'm going to try MT to see how that works, but I hardly maintain the regimen. Did I mention, I HATE doing my own hair?

6) I travel about 70% with my job so lugging around hair care products and tools is out of the question (I carry on to keep from paying to check bags and it's much faster not to have to wait for a checked bag that may not get to your destination), and a lot of times, I just don't want to start "the hair battle", so it's the old phony pony or bun or a wig. The phony pony starts looking crazy late in a stretch due to the texture difference and the wig looks like Barbie doll hair!

7) Nothing is more frustrating than taking the 3 - 4 hours to get my texlaxed hair relatively straight (I still struggle with roller sets and I try to keep flat ironing to a minimum) only to be exposed to the slightest bit of moisture (sweat, humidity, rain) and look a HAM in 5 minutes! I end up looking like a CHIA PET!

I know I'm venting, but I don't know what to do! I feel like I am more victimized by my hair now that I'm trying to get it to grow than when I was getting it fried bone straight every 6 weeks. I have to admit...my hair looked great then, but it never grew.

Part of me wants to give up and go back to my old habits (relaxing every 6 weeks, spending upwards of 5 hours in the salon every Friday for a roller set, etc.), but my hair is longer and thicker than it's ever been, so I know the LHCF stuff works.

I thought about trying the Dominicans bi-weekly, but I know that heat can be damaging, and I really am practically completely bald around my edges. That can't be good. Besides, I get tired of them pressuring me to get a relaxer every time I come in...my stylist had dreads at one time, so it's not like they aren't used to textured hair!!!

I don't know. Maybe I just need a hug. Has anyone else felt like this or do I just need some chocolate and some Midol?

 

[glamazon386]

Sweetheart calm down... Woooo saaaaa.... It's really not that bad. First off, stop being so concerned about what other people think. It's not about them. You have to do what is best for you.

Secondly, why do you feel your hair is so unmanageable? You need to figure out what the problem is first and then go from there.

Also, If you cannot find a stylist you trust, then you should become a DIYer like many ladies here on the board. I suggest you develop a simple regimen and stick to it. All these extra steps and products and convoluted regimens are not necessary. I know all the stuff on this board can make you crazy but keeping it simple is key. Streamline your products. Get a good shampoo, conditioner/deep conditioner (sometimes you can use the same product for both), and a leave in (this can be used as a styling product as well. Many people use a leave in to roller set with for example). That's a good starting point. Then add styling products as needed per style.

If you do not feel comfortable wearing false hair, then don't. Find some low manipulation styles that are easy for you to do (or have a friend do on your hair) and wear your hair that way until it grows out. I would say at least try it for 6 months and see if you notice a difference. HTH...

 

[Amerie123]

Girl, u are so silly, let it out. but its okay, u are keeping it real. I mean, in your case, i would just go to salons (only once a month), to prevent you from DIY all the time, since u cant stand it. but, just be strict with them, and let them know exactly what you want. Find a good salon, preferably the Dominicans, cuz they are good at helping you reach your goals.
But anyways, this will prevent u from looking like a HAM as u would say, and it will help you with your stretches (they will deal with all the NG). But if you can, try to avoid going back to the old practices.
And don't wear wigs if u really feel uncomfortable with them. try to sport different styles that will accommodate your situation. Like if you have a lot of NG, wear braid outs. or rod it up. and for your situation, i would just keep everything very, very simple. so that when u are traveling, u would just need your basics.
you just gotta find more styles, and simpler methods, etc. Oh, and as far as the growth aides, if after u try the MT, and u are still not content with it, then just leave the growth aides alone all together. HTH. (((HUGS)))

 

[Neith]

Just my 2 cents...

Whatever you choose to do with your hair should fit your LIFESTYLE and make you HAPPY.

It just seems that you are having too much trouble with your hair.

I suggest that you really rethink all your options.

The sisterlocks is a cool idea. Maybe you could try different styling options. Stretch your wash days? Find different products/techniques that make your regimen easier to take on the road? Go back to your pre lhcf habits (but integrate what you have learned here to make it better)...

I don't think you're being silly. Sometimes change helps!

 

[*fabulosity*]

I feel you. I've not been on LHCF that long.. but I'm amazed at some of the "don'ts" I was doing regularly when I had waist length hair. So I sift through ALL of the warnings; but try to keep to task at hand in focus. What works for me.

With that said, you have seen some progress. I can DIY; but I don't DIY bc I have hair all over my bathroom and it seems like it gets everywhere. Super annoying for me. What I have found that works is going to the salon weekly. BUT my stylist and I have discussed what my hair goals are, where I've been and where I'm going with this hair on my head..and she is very encouraging to what I want to do. You might have to go through a few stylists to find someone who can cater to your goals. I don't use heat at home (unless its the hood dryer for a DC) and that keeps me out of my head with damaging things like (blow dryers, flat irons, etc).. But my hair is not terrified of heat..that's what works for me.

But definitely do you! You have to make sure your reggie works for your lifestyle. I don't know what sisterlocks are..but if they work at accomplishing your goal (growing healthy low maintenance hair) GO FOR IT!

Happy growing girl!

 

[LadyBlu]

Just my 2 cents...

Whatever you choose to do with your hair should fit your LIFESTYLE and make you HAPPY.

It just seems that you are having too much trouble with your hair.

I suggest that you really rethink all your options.

The sisterlocks is a cool idea. Maybe you could try different styling options. Stretch your wash days? Find different products/techniques that make your regimen easier to take on the road? Go back to your pre lhcf habits (but integrate what you have learned here to make it better)...

I don't think you're being silly. Sometimes change helps!

Well, maybe I'm tripping just a little! I really think that sisterlocks may be the ultimate option for me (but I'm scurred!!!!) I've been doing some research, but the info is all over the place and the only place where there is an actual "Forum" on sisterlocks (Yahoo) is a little cumbersome. Maybe I should suggest starting one here... Hmmm...

 

[nomoweavesfome]

Just my 2 cents...

Whatever you choose to do with your hair should fit your LIFESTYLE and make you HAPPY.

It just seems that you are having too much trouble with your hair.

I suggest that you really rethink all your options.

The sisterlocks is a cool idea. Maybe you could try different styling options. Stretch your wash days? Find different products/techniques that make your regimen easier to take on the road? Go back to your pre lhcf habits (but integrate what you have learned here to make it better)...

I don't think you're being silly. Sometimes change helps!

cannot emphasize this enough!! - but anyhoo. Yes baby, I am there. Right at the crossroads with you, and because my brain cannot catch up with what my hair wants or needs right now. I'm just staying calm before I make a ecision I will regret. I know within the next few days what will make most sense for me at THIS TIME. hang in there LADY BLU

 

[DreadlockedLady0171]

Well, maybe I'm tripping just a little! I really think that sisterlocks may be the ultimate option for me (but I'm scurred!!!!) I've been doing some research, but the info is all over the place and the only place where there is an actual "Forum" on sisterlocks (Yahoo) is a little cumbersome. Maybe I should suggest starting one here... Hmmm...

Check out
http://locksblogsphotos.blogspot.com/
You will find some blogs of sistas with sisterlocs and you can at least see their journeys there. There will be some with braidlocs and traditional locs but the focus is sistalocs.

 

[LadyBlu]

Thanks nomoweaves. OT your hair is PURTY!

 

[delray712000]

I'm sure I am not the only woman that reaches this crossroads..I am at about 12 weeks post, and due to the constant battle with maintaining healthy hair, I am seriously considering remaining natural and getting sisterlocks (a decision that has its own set of issues) or going back to my pre LHCF habits. I can't take it anymore!

Here are my issues:

1) Stretching is vital to maintaining healthy hair, but it gets so hard to maintain once you get past the 8 week mark.

2) I HATE doing my own hair. It takes too long, and it always ends up looking a hot mess, but anyone I pay to do it always ends up doing something to mess it up (chopping it off, overprocessing, etc).

3) I am not a big fan of weaves (ummm...that's why I want my OWN hair to grow out) and that's what's responsible for pulling out my hairline as it is, but at least I don't go around looking like I shot the sheriff. My hair is long, but it looks bad!

4) I have no choice but to wear wigs right now because I don't have the time or energy to do my own hair, but I just feel wierd in wigs. I feel like everyone KNOWS it's not my hair and they think I'm one of "those girls" who can't grow hair and I'm forced to wear a wig because I don't have much hair of my own. Actually, I have thick SL hair, it's just so unmanageable.

5) Any growth aids RUIN my skin! Bitotin breaks me out, BT breaks me out, MTG broke me out... I'm going to try MT to see how that works, but I hardly maintain the regimen. Did I mention, I HATE doing my own hair?

6) I travel about 70% with my job so lugging around hair care products and tools is out of the question (I carry on to keep from paying to check bags and it's much faster not to have to wait for a checked bag that may not get to your destination), and a lot of times, I just don't want to start "the hair battle", so it's the old phony pony or bun or a wig. The phony pony starts looking crazy late in a stretch due to the texture difference and the wig looks like Barbie doll hair!

7) Nothing is more frustrating than taking the 3 - 4 hours to get my texlaxed hair relatively straight (I still struggle with roller sets and I try to keep flat ironing to a minimum) only to be exposed to the slightest bit of moisture (sweat, humidity, rain) and look a HAM in 5 minutes! I end up looking like a CHIA PET!

I know I'm venting, but I don't know what to do! I feel like I am more victimized by my hair now that I'm trying to get it to grow than when I was getting it fried bone straight every 6 weeks. I have to admit...my hair looked great then, but it never grew.

Part of me wants to give up and go back to my old habits (relaxing every 6 weeks, spending upwards of 5 hours in the salon every Friday for a roller set, etc.), but my hair is longer and thicker than it's ever been, so I know the LHCF stuff works.

I thought about trying the Dominicans bi-weekly, but I know that heat can be damaging, and I really am practically completely bald around my edges. That can't be good. Besides, I get tired of them pressuring me to get a relaxer every time I come in...my stylist had dreads at one time, so it's not like they aren't used to textured hair!!!

I don't know. Maybe I just need a hug. Has anyone else felt like this or do I just need some chocolate and some Midol?

I THINK YOU NEED A HUG. DON'T GIVE UP, IT WILL GET BETTER

 

[Foxglove]

I've been at that point for the last few months. When I get there I throw in some braids so I can leave the hair alone for a while. I took out my Senegalese twists last week and after just one day of the same ole bun I got new braids put in. I'll have to figure something out soon

 

[LadyBlu]

I wish I could do the Braids or Twists, but I have to worry about my corporate image. I don't think those styles will be accepted. I'm already a little afraid of getting Sisterlocks because of this...

Sometimes being the only one of color can be challenging. I come here to get grounded.

I can't WAIT to wear my Obama shirt on November 5th after he wins...yes at the corporate meeting!!! (Well, after hours...)

 

[Foxglove]

Micros or Senegalese twists work fine (to me) in a corporate environment bc you can always put them in a ponytail or a bun

 

[jndurieux]

My Mother has sisterlocks and she loves them, you can still do things with them like curl them or put them in different hairstyles and they are low maintnence. It does take a long time to put them in and it cost a lot but my mom says it is well worth it. You do have to get them touched up when they start to grow out. If you like them you should go for it.

 

[naptrl]

I of course, think sisterlocks is a wonderful idea. I started with long, thick hair and did not have any problems managing it, but I ALLLWAys wore micros or some type of braids anyway, so I thought, Why not just have my own hair like that? I work out sooo much that sisterlocks are a perfect hair solution for me! You can see them in my album!