bkprincesa
New Member
Okay. I am in serious need of some support and encouraging words because I have just about had it with people's negativity towards my hair today.
I'm a student, and I spend 80% of my life in NYC (where I am also permanently settled with my SO). I go out of state for the Holidays and such to visit my parents. Though they saw me 7 weeks ago (when I was 4 months post or more) and I told them I was "going natural," the moment I got off the plane this time there was all this fuss about my hair. Negative fuss. It wasn't wild and all over the place, wasn't uncombed...It was in a bun.
I took it down for a few minutes to play with my thick, curly and kinky new growth which I am just starting to feel comfortable with. I was in a lazy mood though so a few minutes turned into an hour...and all the while, everyone in my house was making comments about my hair. My mother said, "if you're going to just neglect your hair like that you might as well get dred locks." Don't get me wrong, I think dred locks are lovely on many women. I just don't think they would suit me, and there is nothing wrong with my natural texture that I shouldn't be able to wear it as a wash and go every day of my life if I want to. I felt like she was dissing me, saying that my hair looked SO bad that all I could do with it would be dred locks. It's very upsetting when, back on the East Coast my SO and my friends all like my curly look.
I got upset and told my mother her comment was ignorant. This was before my father basically implied that I better stay in New York if I plan on coming home with short hair next time. Like wtf?! It's just hair, and on top of that it's MY hair.
I'm at month 5 or 6 (of hopefully 15) in my transitioning process and I'm just now getting to the point where I'm confident about my new growth. I feel like I've made some accomplishments with learning how to deal with two textures, and it isn't an easy process. I know all of you ladies out there know that, whether you are transitioning long-term or you're just stretching before your next relaxer. I haven't had second thoughts about transitioning or had an urge to give in to relaxing since I was at month months 3 and 4 and it was feeling GREAT.
It HURTS to know that I can get more support from strangers on a hair forum than from my own family, but that's exactly what I need right now. Support.
I'm a student, and I spend 80% of my life in NYC (where I am also permanently settled with my SO). I go out of state for the Holidays and such to visit my parents. Though they saw me 7 weeks ago (when I was 4 months post or more) and I told them I was "going natural," the moment I got off the plane this time there was all this fuss about my hair. Negative fuss. It wasn't wild and all over the place, wasn't uncombed...It was in a bun.
I took it down for a few minutes to play with my thick, curly and kinky new growth which I am just starting to feel comfortable with. I was in a lazy mood though so a few minutes turned into an hour...and all the while, everyone in my house was making comments about my hair. My mother said, "if you're going to just neglect your hair like that you might as well get dred locks." Don't get me wrong, I think dred locks are lovely on many women. I just don't think they would suit me, and there is nothing wrong with my natural texture that I shouldn't be able to wear it as a wash and go every day of my life if I want to. I felt like she was dissing me, saying that my hair looked SO bad that all I could do with it would be dred locks. It's very upsetting when, back on the East Coast my SO and my friends all like my curly look.
I got upset and told my mother her comment was ignorant. This was before my father basically implied that I better stay in New York if I plan on coming home with short hair next time. Like wtf?! It's just hair, and on top of that it's MY hair.
I'm at month 5 or 6 (of hopefully 15) in my transitioning process and I'm just now getting to the point where I'm confident about my new growth. I feel like I've made some accomplishments with learning how to deal with two textures, and it isn't an easy process. I know all of you ladies out there know that, whether you are transitioning long-term or you're just stretching before your next relaxer. I haven't had second thoughts about transitioning or had an urge to give in to relaxing since I was at month months 3 and 4 and it was feeling GREAT.
It HURTS to know that I can get more support from strangers on a hair forum than from my own family, but that's exactly what I need right now. Support.
Don't let them get you down. I really feel sorry for Black Americans who don't believe natural hair is beautiful. 
Maybe you need to become more assertive? 
Are you just letting these comments fly? Even if they're family there's no need to make someone feel so uncomfortable about something that just isn't that serious! I suggest this: 
