Hi Bobbiedoll,
I'm not an expert by far, but this is what I do:
1. Always pray before you start and ask God to guide you to the message he has for you. I can't tell you how many times I've done just that and (seemingly randomly) just opened the bible to scriptures that fit my exact situation.
2. Sometimes I just read through the Psalms or Proverbs. Psalms shows me so many examples of how David constantly communicated with God, even when he was afraid, frustrated, sad, and angry. Personally, I think Proverbs hold a lot of wisdom.
3. I have the Aspire Women of Color study bible and it actually makes it a little bit easier. It makes the people in the bible come to life and it also has guided reading sections that directs you to scriptures for modern day situations. (example stress management: learning to say no) So I guess the first thing should be make sure you have a study bible, instead of just a regular bible.
This may be a little long, but I want to give you an example of how it makes the characters come to life. (The following was typed directly from my bible- verbatim. These are not the scriptures, but an example of the women of the bible notes)
Leah
Courage, Resistance, and Struggle
Leah's story is one that many women can relate to. It is the story of a woman longing to be loved, looking for validation, yearning to be affirmed. Women who recognize they're on a dead-end road and therefore desire to know what to do next and how to find a new way can learn from Leah's experiences.
"Leah girl" came to my church last Sunday with her six children. She was tall and lanky and had pretty eyes, but no other feature distinguished her from most "sistas." A member invited "Leah girl", because "Leah girl" had been drawn by her testimony. While on her post as a security guard, "Leah girl" overheard the lament of another young woman. This young woman had been dissed by her man again. Their relationship was a series of broken promises. "Leah girl" walked up and said," Excuse me, it sounds like you're where I just left.
"Leah girl" had just found the courage to break free from the married man with whom she'd been involved. I bet the first five of her children are named, "This time he'll love me." I get the feeling, however, that the youngest is named, "Now I will praise the Lord."
"Leah girl" came to my church last Sunday. She was hungry, thirsty and looking for a relationship with the Lord. She had come to terms with the fact that validation, affirmation, and confirmation are gifts from the Lord and not empty promises from immoral brothers. "Leah girl" lifted her face to praise God.
"Leah girl" represents thousands of women looking for love in all the wrong places. The Biblical Leah spent many years competing for Jacob's love, but one day she decided to look to the Lord instead. For many years Leah struggled to feel fulfilled through her relationship with her husband. During some of vthose years, she found the strength to rely on the Lord; at other times, she fell victim to the trap of looking for validation through another. If your name is "Leah girl," take the first step today to develop a relationship with Christ. Let the Lord create in you that which will bring eternal satisfaction.
-E. Walters
***( Then there is a reflections section with questions you can answer in your journal)
Reflection:
Have you had the courage to leave unhealthy patterns in the past?
What got you through?
Use your past success to help break other unhealthy patterns or share your testimony with someone who needs to hear it.
Bobbiedoll, I'm sure you get the picture. It really helps me to see how I can possibly relate to someone that lived so many years ago. HTH