All of the other suggestions upthread are excellent.
I want to add, “Be gentle with yourself and give yourself permission to feel however you feel without self-policing your thoughts and emotions.”
Dealing with an illness, or any challenge that messes with so many different dimensions of your life like an illness does, is challenging and stressful enough without adding to it with anxiety and guilt (you said “I know I sound vain,” and I disagree that you do).
Hair can be such a cornerstone for our femininity as women, our self-esteem in feeling beautiful. And even on a hair board like this one, sometimes, it can be trivialized. Sometimes I think phrases like, “It’s just hair,” are meant to be reassuring, like “hair isn’t the be all and end all to your womanhood or beauty.” But the reality is that we can know something in our heads and feel totally contrary in our hearts.
The fact that you’ve been on this board for so long, and that you’ve maintained healthy relaxed hair for as long as you have means that you already have the foundation to baby your hair through whatever challenges and changes it may go through as you recover your health.
And then for the practical suggestion: don’t discount a nice wig.
If you’re accustomed to straight hair and that’s what makes you feel most beautiful and confident and comfortable, definitely consider investing in a wig that matches your real hair.
You would then have a readily available option should you not be up to a salon visit or self-styling a straightening session. A very nice wig can switch between primary and backup styling options AND maintain the appearance of consistency and normalcy despite otherwise trying circumstances.
I say this as someone who has been the primary support for multiple women going through medical treatments or injuries that compromised their appearance and energy. Staying in good high spirits paved the way for smoother recovery and I encourage you not to demean whatever helps you keep those good high spirits, whether that’s a bangin rollerset or an undetectable lacefront or whatever.