HELP!! I'm 12 weeks post-relaxer and going CRAZY!!

[Crystalicequeen123]

Hey girls...

I've been proud at how long I've been able to stretch my relaxer, but after about 10 weeks, my hair started to rebel. Everything was fine when I was getting my hair roller set and blownout at the dominican salon. My hair wasn't falling out, and it was easy to get a comb through.

But just a few days ago, I gave myself a MUCH needed wash and condition, but I airdried my hair. Is this a bad thing? I wanted to give my hair a break from heat. So, I didn't roller set it, or blowdry it. But now, my hair is SOO tangled! I can't comb it at the roots, and if I try, my hair will fall out. My hair at my roots is so tangled. Some parts of my hair are even knotted up. What do I do about this UNRULY hair at the roots? I'm happy that I seem to have a lot of newgrowth, but I think it's taking a toll on me if I keep losing hair. Plus, how will my stylist be able to part my hair in order to put a perm in it when I FINALLY do get my relaxer at 14 weeks?

HELP! I need suggestions! Advice. Anything!

 

[candibaby]

Dont worry, I've gone longer than that and my stylist was still able to part through my new growth. Just make sure she doesnt try to do it with a little rattail comb. Do you have any good moisturizer for your new growth, like Scurl or something? Maybe putting a good moisturizer on it, using a wide tooth comb, and slowly working your way from the bottom of the tangles to the top would help you get rid of them without losing your hair. Sorry if I'm not much help, the only thing that tames my new growth is curl activator.

 

[mighty_isis]

when I stretch my relaxers that long I usually do a roller set and then air-dry.... my roots are usually very thick and I use my ceramic iron to straighten them out.

 

[Poohbear]

I have almost 12 weeks of newgrowth. Before you airdry, always detangle your hair with a wide tooth comb when it's WET, especially when there's conditioner in your hair. I use my Jilbere Shower Comb in the shower when conditioner is in my hair and when I'm out of the shower, I section my hair, spray my leave-in and use a K-Cutter Comb to detangle.

So I would say re-wet your hair to detangle. Section your hair and make sure your detangle from ends to roots. Hope that helps!

 

[Crystalicequeen123]

Thanks ladies. I think I'll try your suggestions when I get home tonight. I just washed my hair on Monday. Do you think it's too early to wash again tonight (Wednesday)? I could condition wash instead of wash with a shampoo.

Maybe I could do this and then maybe rollerset my hair. That would probably be better for my hair. I just HATE rollersetting my hair alone. My arm gets really tired. And nobody else in my family knows how to roller set. :-(

But thanks for the advice. And I'll have to look up that Scurl activator solution you're talking about Candibaby. I need something for these untame roots!

 

[redeemed516]

I am 15-17 weeks post relaxer. What i do to help when air drying ..after detangling i pull it back in a loose ponytail or bun and let it air dry. That helps to relax some of my new growth. Sometimes I gun over it with a flatiron or curling iron.

 

[onepraying]

Hey girls...

I've been proud at how long I've been able to stretch my relaxer, but after about 10 weeks, my hair started to rebel. Everything was fine when I was getting my hair roller set and blownout at the dominican salon. My hair wasn't falling out, and it was easy to get a comb through.

But just a few days ago, I gave myself a MUCH needed wash and condition, but I airdried my hair. Is this a bad thing? I wanted to give my hair a break from heat. So, I didn't roller set it, or blowdry it. But now, my hair is SOO tangled! I can't comb it at the roots, and if I try, my hair will fall out. My hair at my roots is so tangled. Some parts of my hair are even knotted up. What do I do about this UNRULY hair at the roots? I'm happy that I seem to have a lot of newgrowth, but I think it's taking a toll on me if I keep losing hair. Plus, how will my stylist be able to part my hair in order to put a perm in it when I FINALLY do get my relaxer at 14 weeks?

HELP! I need suggestions! Advice. Anything!

Uh-oh at that far post I couldn't DREAM of airdrying my hair loose. You poor baby!

If it were me, I'd do one of two things:
1. get under the shower and let the water run over my head, then add lots of conditioner(mix in some oil for slip) and gently seperate the hair with my fingers first. Then, get my wide tooth comb and start combing...... again..... gently seperate in sections. Rinse and Wring each section, add one of your best stretching moisturizers(mine is SheaMoisture or CD Hair Milk; others use butters like Shea or Mango or CD HealthyHair) ESPECIALLY to your roots and either do a twistout, rollerset (you can air dry these) or bun it up.

2. grab a detangler like Surge 14 and spray, like crazy, my whole dry head and began seperating and sectioning the hair and style. (Or use a spray bottle, whatever works best for you)

I try to use something to soften my newgrowth, suggestions have been carrot oil, WGO, castor oil. I've used castor oil, Nature's Blessing, SheaMoisture Leave-In. Massage these directly into the newgrowth.

When you get your touch up tell your stylist to section your hair with the tail of a rattail comb.

I hope this helps....


HHG-

~op~

 

[UmSumayyah]

try using coconut oil on your hair as well. It should smooth your curl pattern a little.

 

[Poohbear]

Thanks ladies. I think I'll try your suggestions when I get home tonight. I just washed my hair on Monday. Do you think it's too early to wash again tonight (Wednesday)? I could condition wash instead of wash with a shampoo.

Maybe I could do this and then maybe rollerset my hair. That would probably be better for my hair. I just HATE rollersetting my hair alone. My arm gets really tired. And nobody else in my family knows how to roller set. :-(

But thanks for the advice. And I'll have to look up that Scurl activator solution you're talking about Candibaby. I need something for these untame roots!

Yeah, I would do a conditioner wash instead of a shampoo wash so your hair isn't stripped or so it doesn't dried out from the shampoo. Btw, S-Curl is some good stuff when it comes to untame roots!

 

[Natalie76]

I have almost 12 weeks of newgrowth. Before you airdry, always detangle your hair with a wide tooth comb when it's WET, especially when there's conditioner in your hair. I use my Jilbere Shower Comb in the shower when conditioner is in my hair and when I'm out of the shower, I section my hair, spray my leave-in and use a K-Cutter Comb to detangle.

So I would say re-wet your hair to detangle. Section your hair and make sure your detangle from ends to roots. Hope that helps!

I'll have to co-sign what Poohbear said. I learned this the hard way. I am currently 16 weeks post relaxer and am getting another one tomorrow. Anyway, I took my braids out on Saturday detangled as I unbraided, but did not detangle again before I washed, because I thought that it wasnt really that tangled. I put conditioner in and when I washed it out, my hair was a MESS! Tangles appeared from out of nowhere. I tore out some hair while trying to comb out the tangles, but it could have been worse. Lesson learned.

 

[sugaplum]

I hear you gurl. I'm 10 weeks post relaxer and my roots are a real thick mess. But I will do what my sista mentioned about using the s-curl. My sis, Cinnabuns uses it and she L-O-V-E-S the stuff!!

 

[Crystalicequeen123]

Thanks everyone.

So, really what I should do is make sure to comb the conditioner in my hair really well especially at the roots? But I've always heard that the less combing the better. I always figure that a LOT of combing will make my hair fall out, especially when wet.

I think the twist out idea is a good one. I will definitely take everyone's advice and try to do some major "damage-control" tonight when I get home from work because this is ridiculous. I have to admit though, maintaining my hair to 12 weeks post relaxer was a bit easier this time. I don't know if it's because I switched over to a mild relaxer, or more because this is the second time stretching so long. Whichever it is, it's getting a little easier little by little!!

PS-would it be wise to put a constructive protein conditioner in my hair like Nexxus emergencee about a week before my next relaxer at 14 weeks? Or, will that make my newgrowth even MORE hard and unruly?

 

[tryn2growmyhair]

Hey girls...

I've been proud at how long I've been able to stretch my relaxer, but after about 10 weeks, my hair started to rebel. Everything was fine when I was getting my hair roller set and blownout at the dominican salon. My hair wasn't falling out, and it was easy to get a comb through.

But just a few days ago, I gave myself a MUCH needed wash and condition, but I airdried my hair. Is this a bad thing? I wanted to give my hair a break from heat. So, I didn't roller set it, or blowdry it. But now, my hair is SOO tangled! I can't comb it at the roots, and if I try, my hair will fall out. My hair at my roots is so tangled. Some parts of my hair are even knotted up. What do I do about this UNRULY hair at the roots? I'm happy that I seem to have a lot of newgrowth, but I think it's taking a toll on me if I keep losing hair. Plus, how will my stylist be able to part my hair in order to put a perm in it when I FINALLY do get my relaxer at 14 weeks?

HELP! I need suggestions! Advice. Anything!

Since I have been using my the no-heat method my hair is ALWAYS at least a little tangled. I am closing in on 12 weeks and I have the same hair type as yours. Have you thought of just wearing it in a bun, combing ONLY the top layer, and smoothing it down with a silk scarf? I know that it wouldnt be pretty if I tried to wear my hair down this long after not having had a relaxer. HTH

 

[Nice]

I am 16 weeks post relaxer and I have 4a/b. I found that washing you hair in sections really helps with the tangles. I also find that CON shampoo is still the best detangling shampoo. It evens detangles better than some conditioners .

 

[Zuppy]

I'm about 12 weeks or so and I have Some THICK 4B hair. To soften up newgrowth I conditioner wash mostly, I only use shampoo once in a while (if I feel a lot of build up)

 

[Crystalicequeen123]

Since I have been using my the no-heat method my hair is ALWAYS at least a little tangled. I am closing in on 12 weeks and I have the same hair type as yours. Have you thought of just wearing it in a bun, combing ONLY the top layer, and smoothing it down with a silk scarf? I know that it wouldnt be pretty if I tried to wear my hair down this long after not having had a relaxer. HTH

I tried doing this, but I think this is what made it come out so unruly. I didn't comb my hair enough when it was wet with conditioner. Therefore, when my hair dried over night with my silk scarf on, I woke up to find my hair really tightly coiled and knotted up at the roots. LOL* And I'm not trying to wear my hair down this long post-relaxer. ha! no way! My hair looks jacked up. Not to mention, my ends aren't looking too hot either. :-(

I think I may try the routine you have Zuppy . I think conditioning washes would be better for me so late in the touch up schedule. By the way, I have a question: For those of you that wash your hair at least once or twice every week , are you all washing your hair with shampoo each time? Or do you all just wash your hair with conditioner every week, and then wash your hair with shampoo every OTHER week? Because I've found that my hair gets kind of dry 10 weeks post relaxer when I wash my hair with shampoo every week. Maybe I should just do condition washes every week, and then shampoo every other week?

I think this could help to loosen the curls at the roots. What do you think?

 

[onepraying]

I tried doing this, but I think this is what made it come out so unruly. I didn't comb my hair enough when it was wet with conditioner. Therefore, when my hair dried over night with my silk scarf on, I woke up to find my hair really tightly coiled and knotted up at the roots. LOL* And I'm not trying to wear my hair down this long post-relaxer. ha! no way! My hair looks jacked up. Not to mention, my ends aren't looking too hot either. :-(

I think I may try the routine you have Zuppy . I think conditioning washes would be better for me so late in the touch up schedule. By the way, I have a question: For those of you that wash your hair at least once or twice every week , are you all washing your hair with shampoo each time? Or do you all just wash your hair with conditioner every week, and then wash your hair with shampoo every OTHER week? Because I've found that my hair gets kind of dry 10 weeks post relaxer when I wash my hair with shampoo every week. Maybe I should just do condition washes every week, and then shampoo every other week?

I think this could help to loosen the curls at the roots. What do you think?

My routine usually consists of this:
Wash 1-2x a week up to about 8 weeks post relaxer.
Wash 2-3x a week from 8-11 weeks post relaxer.
Wash 3-4x a week from 11 and beyond post relaxer.(if at all possible)
I wash with shampoo atleast 1x a week especially on my everything day(deep conditionings and so on) any extra washing during the week I cw. The CWs help me with shedding and softening/control my newgrowth.
I have to admit though, eversince I've been using NTM shampoo, I've used it in two of my washings. I really like that stuff! It doesn't strip or dry my hair and it feels and smells so good!

My hair would dry tightly coiled in the middle when I put it in a bun. However, I just take down the bun and attack the newgrowth with some sort of softener like mentioned in the above posts. Curl activator does work, it just makes my hair feel slimy. I usually mix a conccoction of it and some other stuff in a spray bottle.

Yes, stretching does get easier each time. Atleast for me they do. I noticed how 10-13 weeks seemed like a cinch when I went this time. The longest I've gone has been 17 weeks.

Btw, you mentioned something about your arms getting tired when you rollerset? Try resting your elbows on the counter and rolling like that for a while. It works for me, I guess because I have long arms.


Hope this helps

~op~

 

[greenidlady1]

You might want to try the coconut milk and lime natural relaxer treatment. There are a lot of threads about it. I have had success with adding the coconut milk to my conditioner too.
Take care,
G

 

[MelsWifey]

PS-would it be wise to put a constructive protein conditioner in my hair like Nexxus emergencee about a week before my next relaxer at 14 weeks? Or, will that make my newgrowth even MORE hard and unruly?

I think that will be fine. I just got through stretching for 21 weeks and I used Aphogee 3 days in advance to prepare my hair for the chemical...I always do.

As far as managing the new growth, the key for me is protective styling once you get really far post and staying on top of the tangles. I wore a sew-in for 4 weeks and boy did I have a lot of hair that had shedded and started to knot-up. But still (with damp hair), I gently sectioned and combed them out before washing. It made the process a lot easier in the end. HTH

 

[Isis]

I have been airdrying my 4b hair for 1.5 years and I stretch until 13 weeks, washing every 3 days, with shampoo. I'm approaching my 13 weeks now and this is what works for me:

The trick is to use a good moisturizing conditioner following shampooing your hair and rinse it out standing under the shower, detangling it at the same time with a large tooth comb (seamless). The running water helps tremendously with the detangling. Additional detangling help comes with a good leave-in like Nexxus Headress or Biolage Leave-in Tonic. Your comb should just slip through from roots to end, with minimal shedding.

I airdry in a rollerset overnight using several ponytails rolled all the way up with large rollers. The scunchie (not scrunchie) seamless fabric bands are dipped in olive oil and these help stretch out the roots while airdrying. I also use a satin or silk scarf after it's airdried for 30 minutes or so to flatten and smooth out any poufiness from my new growth.

I also wear styles that are in harmony with my newgrowth which means no straight styles. Just braidouts, braided updos, etc.

 

[chicamorena]

I have 4a/b hair and I too am 12 weeks post relaxer. The trick for me is to airdry in 4 ponytails with rollers on the length of my hair. I put 2 ponytails in the front and 2 in the back. After my hair is dry I pull it back into a bun. It's best to comb your hair only when it's wet, especially the roots.

 

[Crystalicequeen123]

Hey everyone! UPDATE!

I took everyone's advice, and did a condition wash in the shower, and really just let the water do most of the detangling. Then, I took a wide-toothed comb and combed my hair at the roots while in the shower with running water (something I had never done before). After towel-drying my hair I put in some conditioner and left it in my hair for an hour, and then proceeded to comb my hair at the roots again to detangle.

Next, I put my hair in twists, and left it in my hair for about 3 days. My hair seems so less tangled now. More moisturized too!

This helped a lot guys. Thanks so much for the advice! If I can just hold out for one more week, I will have gone 14 weeks post relaxer! A NEW RECORD! Yippee! I can't wait to see the fruitage of my hard work!

Does anyone else get kind of sad or down around relaxer time? It's the oddest thing. Before, when I wasn't stretching my relaxers, I could barely make it to 8 weeks, and I was always SUPER happy when it was "relaxer time". But now that I'm stretching my hair out to 12 and 14 weeks, I'm almost depressed that I'll be getting a relaxer again.

One, because I know I won't have much to do with my newly relaxed hair (it's so straight), but also two because I know that when I do get a relaxer, my hair will be thinner again. :-( I was getting used to my little curly-Q's in my virgin hair.

 

[onepraying]

................Does anyone else get kind of sad or down around relaxer time? It's the oddest thing. Before, when I wasn't stretching my relaxers, I could barely make it to 8 weeks, and I was always SUPER happy when it was "relaxer time". But now that I'm stretching my hair out to 12 and 14 weeks, I'm almost depressed that I'll be getting a relaxer again.

One, because I know I won't have much to do with my newly relaxed hair (it's so straight), but also two because I know that when I do get a relaxer, my hair will be thinner again. :-( I was getting used to my little curly-Q's in my virgin hair.

YES!!! I call it my "newgrowth blues" I liked playing in my newgrowth and it seemed like I had to keep coming up with ways to detangle, style, not manipulate my hair. I stretched to 17 weeks back in Sept, 04. When I got my touch-up I was soooo bored! I guess I was having fun learning about my hair and getting to know it. Now when I stretch, I'm stretching to about 13 weeks and it is much easier.

With the new flat hair I don't have much to to do it. That's when I started exploring rollersetting for fullness and non-mainipulation...and well...fun

I'm now anxious to get my touchup just so I can see how much length I've gained.

HHG-

~op~

 

[CORBINS]

There's this new product called EXTEND-A-PERM by Soft and Beautiful. I haven't used it. Try doing a search. It's supposed to soften and stregthen the new growth.