Ever postponed your transition...???

[CarLiTa]

because it wasn't the right time?

for example you felt that it wasn't the right time emotionally, or in terms of your impending career goals?


If so, what were your reasons? and how did you deal? Did you feel guilty at all?

Thanks for the responses

 

[Kay.Dee]

In 2007 I was 9 months into my transition and took out my braids.

My Dad made me feel like crap when he saw my hair and I relaxed.
I wasn't mentally ready anyways and he made matters even worse.

I don't feel guilty, I wasn't ready a that moment. I was too sensitive and I was already on the fence about going natural anyways. I had intended on stretching and decided to go natural about 4 months into it.

Now I know I am ready and could care less about what anyone has to say.
I've been nothing but disappointed with my relaxed hair (even after I found hair boards).
I'm 7 month in, and I know that I'm going through with it because I never want to transition again because it can be hell!

 

[justsimply]

I haven't postponed my transition to natural, but I did postpone my decision to lock after 4 wks in. I didn't/don't feel guilty because I'm just not ready. I know that is where I'll probably end up (been there before and loved it). I'm just not ready now. IMO it's just HAIR and it's MINE. I can do what I want with it.

 

[CarLiTa]

thanks for your responses, ladies.

i guess my question is actually quite premature. By the time i have to make that decision, i could be natural already, lol.

the thing is, when i do become natural, i don't really want to be flat-ironing my hair often... therefore i feel like i need substantial length for what *I* would feel comfortable wearing out.

i'm only 4 months post, by the way

 

[justsimply]

I feel you totally on the comfortable length thing. I was going to lock via kinky twist because I didn't want to cut my length yet. I'm glad I didn't because I changed my mind. I plan to wear kinky twists/braids for most of the summer. Keeping my length allows me to take breaks from this style and not feel uncomfortable with the length. I'm hoping by the winter I'll have enough length for nice 2 strand twists during the week and cute twist outs for the weekends.

 

[MizzBrown]

I did! I wasn't ready. My hair was having too many issues and I gave up and relaxed.

I'm stretching it more and more until i get more comfortable with my new growth and then I will make the final transition.

The longer I stretch and the more stuff I try on here then the better its been getting and eventually, those 4 month stretches will turn into 5 month stretches and so forth and so forth...

No one had anything positive to say when I told family and friends that i wanted to transition. Hell, they give me mess about stretching. They just ask why? They don't realize that a relaxer is a harsh chemical. All they ask is why, why, why?

Whatever. When my hair touches my boobs, and its natural, I don't wanna hear it..

 

[vlucious]

kinda, i postponed it and BC!

 

[Mook's hair]

thanks for your responses, ladies.

i guess my question is actually quite premature. By the time i have to make that decision, i could be natural already, lol.

the thing is, when i do become natural, i don't really want to be flat-ironing my hair often... therefore i feel like i need substantial length for what *I* would feel comfortable wearing out.

i'm only 4 months post, by the way

I am also transitioning without the BC. I have considered postponing it many times but I just keep moving forward and I am now I am almost 13 month post. and still no BC

I have seen an had some close interactions and conversations with many women who canceled or postponed their transitions. Some felt guilt, some felt disappointment and some did not. The choice is up to you.

But I don't understand what you mean when you say...by the time I have to make that decision. You don't have to BC. There are several women here who did transition with small trims and no BC.

We are here to support you, whatever you decide. Do you want to be motivated to proceed with the transition journey or talked into ending it and relaxing? What direction are you leaning?

 

[SunnyDelight]

I am transitioning without the BC and although I LOVE LOVE LOVE my hair right now, my daughter is getting married on May 25th and I have no clue about what I'm gonna do to my hair. When pressed my hair reverts so fast and of course I want a classy updo.

WHAT TO DO, WHAT TO DO????? . . . . . .

 

[HoneyA]

I know I'm postponing mine right now. I really want to transition again and I know that it is inevitable but I'm just not ready emotionally I think. Right now my hair is healthy,a lot longer, it looks really good ...whenever it's freshly done. I am aiming to start my transition in December this year. We'll see how I feel then but that's my aim. I've transitioned many times before because my hair looked horrible or was breaking off so it was easy but this time it's a lot harder. It's almost like there is no reason too but the real reason is that now that I know how to take care of my own texture, I long for long, flowing natural tresses. The good thing is that whenever I decide to do it I'll know how to do it properly. I'm not going to do a BC. I never have. Until the time comes, the internal debate continues...

 

[CarLiTa]

I am also transitioning without the BC. I have considered postponing it many times but I just keep moving forward and I am now I am almost 13 month post. and still no BC

I have seen an had some close interactions and conversations with many women who canceled or postponed their transitions. Some felt guilt, some felt disappointment and some did not. The choice is up to you.

But I don't understand what you mean when you say...by the time I have to make that decision. You don't have to BC. There are several women here who did transition with small trims and no BC.

We are here to support you, whatever you decide. Do you want to be motivated to proceed with the transition journey or talked into ending it and relaxing? What direction are you leaning?

well what i mean is... by the time i have to make the decision to be FULLY natural (i.e BC'ing). Like for example, I thought about transitioning for UP to 2 years at the most, if i could make it.
There is a specific reason that's making me doubt transitioning at the moment. My hair is what most would consider long, and I frankly don't know how to manage it. I'm thinking... there's a lot that I would like to do with my relaxed hair before getting rid of it, all the things I was afraid to do... b/c i'm not going to have the same length for a good number of years if I go natural.

I KNOW that when I become a natural that I don't intend on flat-ironing my hair often. And *I* feel like if I'm trying to break into an industry (again, this is premature, lol. i still have a good 2 years before graduation from college) then having hair in the transitioning process might not be the best thing. I guess that's submitting to societal pressure, perhaps, but since i'm not into flat-ironing my hair, then the only other ideal would be to wear it in 2 textures, and that doesn't look right with me, with my mediocre skills

anyway. i'm rambling. i just find transitioning to be a bit difficult. They say it gets easier, but by the time it gets easier, I might be in a situation in which I have to flat-iron for an interview or for job recruiting... someone told me that you have to have a "look"-- and i'm willing to have "the look" to get the job... 2 years down the line, lol, and worry about my hair later... but by then, i could be natural you know?...

so maybe i'm thinking about this too early and should just keep transitioning!

 

[FemmeCreole]

I attempted to transition in 2001-2002....I had a short Halle type haircut at the time and I figure it would be easy to grow that out natural. I used to cornrow my hair a lot but I realy didn't know what I was doing. I b/f at the time was all for it but then I moved back home and my aunt the hairdresser got to me and made me relax.

 

[CarLiTa]

bump....
still thinking

 

[straightlovely]

yes i think i am going to postpone it now actually! it's only been 2 months. I'm just not ready right now. my hair is already SUPER thick relaxed. When it's natural it's so hard to do. I need to want to put in the effort and I'm not prepared for that now. erplexed

 

[cottoncoily]

because it wasn't the right time?

for example you felt that it wasn't the right time emotionally, or in terms of your impending career goals?


If so, what were your reasons? and how did you deal? Did you feel guilty at all?

Thanks for the responses

I postponed transitions before. Once I stretched for 8 months and fell in love with my coils. I ended up relaxing because I didn't want to hear negative comments about my natural hair any more. That was when I actually cared what people thought I felt guilty afterwards because I felt that I let myself down. Some people have no regrets at all. Just do what makes you feel comfortable and you'll be happy.

 

[Southernbella.]

because it wasn't the right time?

for example you felt that it wasn't the right time emotionally, or in terms of your impending career goals?


If so, what were your reasons? and how did you deal? Did you feel guilty at all?

Thanks for the responses

Yep, when I came to LHCF and saw all the long, healthy relaxed hair. I figured, if they can do it, I can do it. I felt guilty for a second, but I always knew I would go natural at some point, so I didn't sweat it.

 

[Southernbella.]

well what i mean is... by the time i have to make the decision to be FULLY natural (i.e BC'ing). Like for example, I thought about transitioning for UP to 2 years at the most, if i could make it.
There is a specific reason that's making me doubt transitioning at the moment. My hair is what most would consider long, and I frankly don't know how to manage it. I'm thinking... there's a lot that I would like to do with my relaxed hair before getting rid of it, all the things I was afraid to do... b/c i'm not going to have the same length for a good number of years if I go natural.


so maybe i'm thinking about this too early and should just keep transitioning!

I totally understand this. I say reach your relaxed goals first. You don't want to be natural and wondering what might have been. I'm not saying you have to stay natural forever, but transitioning and BCing is not something you want to keep doing over and over.

I knew I wanted to get to WL with relaxed hair before I went natural. I got to MBL and was sick of it and BCed. But I was close, and I have absolutely no regrets about the timing or anything.

 

[Soliel185]

I did. I got to like 7 months in January and just had a moment of panic after taking my hair out of braids. It's like when I physically see all the hair at once I just panic b/c it seems so huge. So I texlaxed end of Jan, and then regretted it pretty much immediately, b/c I know how much further along I'd be now if I'd stuck with it.

I'm not sure if I'm completely prepared mentally, but I'm very stubborn. So this time I'm sticking with it, and if I start to panic I will BC before I relax again.