Desperately need help with breakage (long)

[MystiqueBabe]

Hello ladies, I just joined today after lurking on this forum for years.

I need your help. I have been suffering from breakage and have just recently had yet ANOTHER set back due to breakage. Now I have dealt with breakage all my life and even after following the tips on this board my hair is still breaking.erplexed It is getting frustrating to me and I feel like crying everytime I have a setback. The breakage was due to stretching my relaxer for 4 months. The back part of my hair just broke off eventually and I am sooo disappointed. i thought stretching was beneficial, as I always used to stretch my relaxers at least 3 months and never had an issue. The top section of my hair is always healthy and long while the back part is constantly dry and brittle. My hair in the front is shoulder length and my hair in the back is neck length.. I trim my hair every 2 months since I am recovering from some heat damage (used to flat iron once a week..ugh never again ) After I recover from my heat damage I will trim my hair as needed. My hair has never been this short. I used to wear my hair in cornrows and had almost BSL hair. Then it had just broke off. My mom then took me to the salon (this was 2 years ago) My ONE section of my hair had broken off to shoulder length. It was in the back, I have always had problems with my hair breaking off like crazy in the back. The stylist relaxed my virgin hair and evened it up to shoulder length. Several months later that is when the back has started breaking off again and I am sad to say that my hair is STILL around the same length it was when the stylist had cut it.

I told my mom how frustrated I was with my hair and she said it just might be stunted or my terminal length is shoulder length. Which can't be true since I almost had BSL hair. She thinks as I got older my hair got "stunted". I want to prove her wrong and grow my hair back to BSL. But I don't seem to be retaining much length. I already know that my hair is not stunted since I get relaxer retouches, I think that this is a fact that most black miss and just say that there hair is not growing.

After this long 2 year ordeal I was fed up of having my hair in the sink and on my clothes instead of on my head. I researched until my eyes hurt about hair care, regimens, and products until I eventually landed on this forum. I made a list and went to my local beauty supply and picked up some products that have been recommeded here. I still want to try a couple and see how it goes. My hair has improved but I am not retaining much length...

My mom does my relaxers and she used to relax from root to tip. I told her to not do that and she has stopped. But the damage is done. She used to keep it in until it was tingling a bit then I would go wash it out. just to get it straight, my edges and nape are very coarse and she smooths out the relaxer on those parts to get it straight. luckily my ends and nape are still as strong and thick (always have been) I have thought about doing it myself. For reference I used no-lye relaxers (box kits) Thinking of changing it to lye relaxers and texlaxing my hair at least.

My hair regi is as follows:

Prepoo- Heat up some Olive Oil and Cream of Coconut
Shampoo- Creme of Nature Detangling Conditioning Shampoo
Clarify- Tresemme Deep Cleansing Shampoo
Co-Wash - Herbal Essences Hello Hydration or Garnier Fructis Sleek & Shine
Deep Condition- Creme of Nature Moisture Extreme Conditioner
Protein- Aphogee 2 min Reconstructer. Organic Root Stimulator Hair Mayo, Eggs
Mositure - Elasta QP Olive Oil & Mango Butter Moisturizer, Shea Butter
Oils- Olive, Coconut Castor Oil

I shampoo once a week usually Monday. Co-Wash on Thursday with Hello Hydration or Garnier and Aphogee 2 min. I moisture with Elasta QP and seal with my castor oil or olive oil. I sometimes use my shea butter for moisture and seal with my oils. I deep condition with Creme of Nature or my Hair Mayo for protein. I occasionally add an egg. I rotate between moisture and protein every week. I detangle from my ends and work my way up. I always handle my hair gently. I sleep with a satin scarf every night. When I am not doing anything during the day I just wear the scarf around the house or after I get back home from school I wear it.

Just wanted to figure out, what could I be doing wrong? I am determined to get healthy, long hair but all these set backs make me want to just throw in the towel and just wear weaves for the rest of my life. I spend sooo much time on my hair and at times I think it is just all a waste of time and money. The funny thing is when I had my cornrows I would never moisturize(except greasing my scalp), sleep with a COTTON scarf, used a hot pressing comb everytime to get my cornrows redone, never even heard of conditioner - forget deep conditioning, and really just did not have a regimen. It baffles me sometimes, lol . But I do enjoy pampering my hair.

 

[curlicarib]

RarityJewel I would stop using protein for a while. Maybe step it back to once a month or every 6 weeks. I've noticed that some people may be protein sensitive and dont' know it. Try skipping the Aphogee and eggs for a week or to and stick with the moisture and see how that goes.

HTH

 

[MystiqueBabe]

@RarityJewel I would stop using protein for a while. Maybe step it back to once a month or every 6 weeks. I've noticed that some people may be protein sensitive and dont' know it. Try skipping the Aphogee and eggs for a week or to and stick with the moisture and see how that goes.

HTH

Thank you for replying. i have tried laying off of protein but my hair felt mushy in the shower and was stretching and breaking every wash day. That's when I bought the Aphogee 2 min product. My hair loves Aphogee 2 min... It is definitely a staple. Especally since I tend to overload with moisture products.

I baby the back part of my hair the most it is improving but I am still experiencing breakage. These are both long strands and small pieces of hair. I hear my hair snapping in the back as i comb it, especially when I have new growth.. It is a bit disheartening.

 

[NaturalBeauty<3]

Thank you for replying. i have tried laying off of protein but my hair felt mushy in the shower and was stretching and breaking every wash day. That's when I bought the Aphogee 2 min product. My hair loves Aphogee 2 min... It is definitely a staple. Especally since I tend to overload with moisture products.

I baby the back part of my hair the most it is improving but I am still experiencing breakage. These are both long strands and small pieces of hair. I hear my hair snapping in the back as i comb it, especially when I have new growth.. It is a bit disheartening.

Are the long strands breakage, or just shedding? Look and see if there is a small bulb at the end of the hair.

If not, you might be experiencing mid shaft splits, which would explain you still having breakage after you got your hair evened out.

 

[newgrowth15]

Have you considered transitioning to natural? Many years ago when I was relaxed, my hair would break off in the back for no reason. I had my last relaxer in 1995 and I BC'd in 1996. My mom relaxed my hair when I was about 9 years old and I continued to relax it until I was 30. The relaxers seemed to just "eat my hair out". My hair never grew past shoulder length. After I went "natural" in 1996. I would press and comb my hair on a daily basis to keep it straight. I did not learn to properly care for my hair until I joined LHCF in 2008. It took awhile for my hair to get healthy from all of the damage I caused because I decided not to BC again, but I am finally seeing results from putting in the time to take care of my hair. With time and patience, you will get the healthy, long hair you desire.

 

[southerncitygirl]

stop relaxing..... how are you wearing your hair weekly because you mainly discussed your reggie. if you use direct heat...stop it. consider roller setting, braidouts or twistouts. bunning can cause people setbacks as well.

 

[NaturalEnigma]

Its probably one of two things:
1) You're using a product that your hair doesn't like and its reacting by falling out.
2) You need more protein/more moisture.

Why not use a stronger protein conditioner like a reconstructor. You should try Aphogee two step protein treatment followed by a moisturizing deep conditioner. Other then that your regimen seems fine. It might be that one of the products you're using is making your hair fall out. I would carefully observe the hair after applying each product to see how it reacts or rotate products to identify what product is causing the breakage.

Can you go to a salon to get your hair relaxed? I think if you go to an experienced stylist, they should be able to apply the relaxer properly so that you don't suffer anymore damage.

I know this is going to sound crazy, but if all else fails, slap some braids on, and give your hair a break. Whenever my hair used to break a lot my remedy was braids. I know that's not what people would recommend, but it always worked for me. Grow out the damaged hair, and take care of it while its braided. Braids will allow the broken parts of your hair to grow back.

I feel your pain. You sound like me before I big chopped........frustrated. Is your hair fine? The description of your hair resembles mine when I was relaxed. My fine hair always needed protein. It'll take time for your hair to stop breaking. I hope everything works out for you.

 

[MystiqueBabe]

Are the long strands breakage, or just shedding? Look and see if there is a small bulb at the end of the hair.

If not, you might be experiencing mid shaft splits, which would explain you still having breakage after you got your hair evened out.

Most of the hair do have white bulbs on them. I thought shedding was another term for breakage/hair loss or am i missing something?

Some of the hair with out the bulbs are probably midshaft splits. I have been S&D. I didn't want to go to the hairdresser since they would probably cut the long front part of my hair to even up with the short nl hair in the back. I was going to wait until the NL hair got to at least shoulder length then cut it even. I know my hair never will be completely free of split ends since I used to flat iron weekly. (I thought it was okay since I was Deep conditioning ) I decided to put the flat iron away.

 

[MystiqueBabe]

Yes, I have thought about going natural but I do like the texlaxed look. I suppose texlaxing is somewhat better for the hair then relaxing.

I usually wear my hair in buns or just keep it in the satin scarf since the back part cannot fully go into a ponytail yet unless I place the ponytail in the back. I dont know how to braid yet but I will learn. I was thinking about putting in braids and just letting it grow out that way. only braids seem to make my hair grow long or at least at its full potential.

Thank you for the product recommendation. I will try Aphogee two step. And no hair is not fine it is sort of thick which is good since I can hide the broken off part in the back.

 

[Poohbear]

Check to see if any of your products have silicone ingredients in them. Any ingredient that ends with -cone or -xane can be detrimental to some hair types. They can make your hair feel good or look good temporarily but when left on the hair shaft for a long time, they can dry your hair out and cause it to break.

Also, how often do your comb your hair? If you comb it excessively or roughly, that can cause breakage as well.

Sent from my PG06100 using LHCF

 

[JazzyOleBabe]

Do you know if you are allergic to coconut? Remove the coconut products from your regimen for a minute. I know that my hair does not like coconut and will start to behave like yours.

 

[MystiqueBabe]

Check to see if any of your products have silicone ingredients in them. Any ingredient that ends with -cone or -xane can be detrimental to some hair types. They can make your hair feel good or look good temporarily but when left on the hair shaft for a long time, they can dry your hair out and cause it to break.

Also, how often do your comb your hair? If you comb it excessively or roughly, that can cause breakage as well.

Sent from my PG06100 using LHCF

I will check my products. I really have no idea of my hair type but I think it's 4A/3C or just 4A.

I usually comb my hair daily once or twice to moisturize and seal, focused on the ends and back mostly.

 

[MystiqueBabe]

Do you know if you are allergic to coconut? Remove the coconut products from your regimen for a minute. I know that my hair does not like coconut and will start to behave like yours.

Nope I am not allergic to coconut. I have eaten coconut products many times and everything was fine. I use it on my hair and everything is normal.

 

[JJamiah]

RarityJewel

Shedding is normal happens to everyone with hair and can't be stopped (some slow it down) but it doesn't completely stop. It has a bulb on the ends because it comes from the scalp. Breakage does not, it can be long or small pieces of hair.

I would clarify 2x
Rinse well

Use your Aphogee 2 minute
leave on for 10
Rinse

Get and Use some Alter Ego Garlic Conditioner
Leave on for about 45 minutes
Rinse well

Add your leave in -
Add your Oil lightly

 

[MystiqueBabe]

Thank you for the suggestion. I am going to clarify sometime next week.

 

[tarheelgurl]

After my last relaxer (1 year ago this month) I had terrible shedding and breakage. I mean it was bad. The back of my head at the nape started breaking something terrible. I determined that it must have been the relaxer so I just started to transition.

I babied the back of my head like it was a 3 month premie. I also realized that even though I was sleeping with a silk scarf that the way I was tying it was causing friction at a certain point in the back. So, I started putting a braid across my head at that place and I put on a satin cap first the tie the scarf. Slowly but surely the nape and back is starting to grow
back in.

So, maybe you should try braiding the back at night and moisturize the hair before you braid it. That has helped me.

 

[sylver2]

i would completely revamp regimen. get rid of those products. start all over. also..no relaxing for awhile. at least 6 months

 

[Poohbear]

I will check my products. I really have no idea of my hair type but I think it's 4A/3C or just 4A.

I usually comb my hair daily once or twice to moisturize and seal, focused on the ends and back mostly.

If your hair texture tends to be dry, stop combing your hair daily, especially stop combing it twice a day. You do not need to necessarily comb your hair before moisturizing and sealing. Smooth your hair with your fingers instead of using a comb. I read an article once that said combing your hair everyday is like giving yourself a mini-trim everyday.

 

[FlawedBeauty]

What is your hair type? Meaning is it thick, thin, fine strands?

 

[MystiqueBabe]

If your hair texture tends to be dry, stop combing your hair daily, especially stop combing it twice a day. You do not need to necessarily comb your hair before moisturizing and sealing. Smooth your hair with your fingers instead of using a comb. I read an article once that said combing your hair everyday is like giving yourself a mini-trim everyday.

I just comb my hair to make sure the moisturizer coats my strands evenly. Otherwise I feel that parts of my hair are not properly moisturized. I will lay off the comb. I am highly considering putting it in a bun for a few months or at least until summer in June or July and see if there is any improvement.

I think low manipulation rules over mostly everything. When my hair got to BSL I only shampooed once a month, never trimmed my hair(was afraid of "cutting my hair"), and never conditioned my hair. I only used heat once a month at the most. One section of the hair broke off due to lack of moisture and that is when the problems began. Now here I am spending all this money on hair products yet my hair is still breaking, which is my fault because I was using a flat iron weekly,..

My new growth is thick but due to the flat iron the relaxed portion of the strands are not as thick as they used to be. They are thin but getting slowly getting fuller.

 

[Wtanya88]

I had the same problem a year and a half ago. My hair was breaking all over the place, after my hairdresser pulled my perm all the way down to my ends. My breakage was mainly in the back too. And, I had to get it cut repeatedly. Until I found this forum and ayetana's aphogee 2 step video on you tube. I started with my regimen. You really have to try different products and see what works for you. CON products didn't help me. I found out that I was a keracare girl ( humecto, hydrating shampoo, etc). I found out that my hair doesn't like Shea butter or glycerin. And its not that crazy about aloe vera juice. But it loves ORS hair mayo when I'm not 2 stepping. I religiously use aphogee 2 step every 6-8 weeks. I stretch 4-6 months and avoid heat. My hair went from never ending nl to bsl in a year or so. So have faith, it will happen. One you tuber recommended keeping a hair regimen product journal, recording how each product and each regimen change affects your hair. Good luck, it will happen for you. Believe me

 

[MystiqueBabe]

Thank you Wtanta88. I will be purchasing Aphogee 2 step. I go hair shopping the first week of every month to try out products that will work for me and whatnot. Your story is very inspiring.