Hi annieb! /images/graemlins/wave.gif
You can speed up the process of removing a semi-permanent that you don't love by using one of two products. The first (and the one I recommend trying first) is called Metalex - The Hairdressers First Aid. It's made by Clairol. You can buy it in most beauty supply stores. It's an oil base with polymers in that bind to the color and remove it from you hair as you rinse. You apply it liberally to dry or damp hair and leave it on (with heat if you like) for a half hour and then rinse, shampoo and condition.
The second product has a bit more muscle, but still won't cause any damage - it has no bleach or peroxide - but you should condition well after using it. It's called Uncolor - it's by Clairol. It should also be applied to damp hair, rinsed, and shampooed out and then you should deep condition well. Make sure you get the one specifically designed for semi-permanent colors. There is a formula for permanent color, but it should not be used on relaxed hair. So be careful which one you pick up. The bottle I have is turquoise.
Both products are designed to remove semi-permanent color build up, and remaining semi-permanent color so you can begin with a clean slate if you want to apply a different semi-permanent color.
Next time you get a semi-perm consider one a deep red with a orange or gold base. Sebasitian Redality or Cinnamon are good choices. That will give you the auburn/copper tint you are seeking. The color you got probably had a violet base - which on the "rinse down" as I call it can turn a weird purplish burgundy or pinkish color depending on how light your natural color is.
You will need to use a permanent color if you wish to go much lighter. But I'd try using a different color semi-perm first to see if you can get a color you like and then go perm only if you have to. You CAN have healthy relaxed and colored hair but it's a lot of work - and if you can get the results you seek using a gentler product that is always best.
Semi-permanent colors, unlike permanents, only deposit color into the cuticle and as such do not require peroxide or ammonia to work as they should. In order to go much lighter you must remove a degree of natural color from further within the hair shaft - the cortex - and this requires the stronger chemicals I mentioned before. Chemicals which may or may not react well with your relaxer since it also targets the cortex to do it's job. Between the relaxer and the color the cortex can get quite a work out and your hair will let you know about it if you aren't careful to really take care of it and use the correct formulas.
If you're serious about permanent color give me a shout and I'll let you know the scoop on that. Otherwise I say play it safe and see if you can get the look you want with the semi-permanents. /images/graemlins/wink.gif
HTH /images/graemlins/smile.gif