Becoming Discouraged

[env10us]

So i just washed my hair today after an almost three week stretch. Mind you, I was at home for Christmas break and my hair was thriving under the care of my stylist (i saw him three times -the first day I got there, about 2 weeks later and one week after that-), but now it just seems to be falling apart. He only flat ironed it and just pressed the edges, and it looked beautiful (i posted those photos in the SL Challenge thread). But today i saw that i have two good size patches on both sides of my hair about an inch long where there USE to be long (as in my length of hair)hair. i don't know what happened. i know that my hair has been shedding a lot, and I expressed that to him, but i never saw this! I really felt like crying. I don't know what to do. And i'm just tired! i don't even wanna do my hair right now because i feel like whats the point? Between school, home life, this thing called a "relationship" and worrying about my looks, it just seems that NOTHING is going my way right now. I just wanna curl up, cry, and watch Eve's Bayou.....

 

[Imani]

I don't have any advice, just wanted to show support. Don't be discouraged!!

I just cut off 1-2 inches of dry, crispy ends today, so i feel ur pain! i feel like its the millionth time i've had to chop off hair.

its going to be okay, though i'm in the SL challenge as well, and we can still make it in 08.

 

[runwaydream]

on a good note... eve's bayou is a really good movie. lol. j/k.. i mean it is tho but.. i kno u dont want to hear that right now.

just kno that this forum is PACKED FULL of women who have gone thru the same set backs and when u see their hair now its long and beautiful and u would've never guessed...
i kno u feel bad, ive been there,we all have. and all i do is support u and tell u that its going to be ok. dont give up cause a yr later you'll regret it when u think about how long ur hair wouldve been if u stuck by it.

as for the patches... those can grow back using some of the growth aides. like MN, or MTG, or BT. as for the shedding there's plenty of treatments u can do that will take care of that.
just keep ur head up ok? u can lay in bed tonight and watch eve's bayou but come tomorrow dust yourself up and get back up and try again. it'll be ok... i promise.

 

[SimpleKomplexity]

It'll be okay!! Just baby those patches and they'll be back in NO TIME!! SMILE, you're BEAUTIFUL!

 

[env10us]

Thanks ladies. I was thinking of trying something like MN, but I'm worried would I have to wash me hair everyday. my hair is sooooooooooo difficult to manage and it would be too much for me to do that.

I'm just so ready to cut it ALL off and start fresh!

And runaway, Eve's Bayou is really good. But i know my roomie is tired of me watching it..I've been hella depressed lately...

 

[locabouthair]

Is you hair overprocessed?

I had bald patches on the sides of my head when i was overprocessed.

Don't give up girl. i know it's hard but hang in there. Without struggle there is no progress.

(((((HUGS)))))

 

[runwaydream]

Thanks ladies. I was thinking of trying something like MN, but I'm worried would I have to wash me hair everyday. my hair is sooooooooooo difficult to manage and it would be too much for me to do that.

I'm just so ready to cut it ALL off and start fresh!

And runaway, Eve's Bayou is really good. But i know my roomie is tired of me watching it..I've been hella depressed lately...

i kno u're kidding about the whole cutting off ur hair thing but in case you're not DONT. u'd probably be so pissed about u cutting ur hair off that u probably wont even want to take care of it anymore. well i use MN and MTG on my scalp every other night and i wash it once a week or whenever its feeling too oily..which is usually once a week.lol.

eve's bayou is good but i always get mad when i watch it. but u have every reason to be depressed. other than ur hair it seems like u're going thru alot of things but it always gets better. just kno it'll pass eventually. not much of a consolation i kno but... its true

 

[DreamLife]

the thing that ive noticed is that when a stylist does my hair, no matter how broken off it seems it LOOKS good when I leave. For some reason they have a tendency to be able to conceal breakage and whatnot. so whenever I do my hair now I part it into sections, especially when its shedding (but its usually breakage because short pieces are coming out) and try to see if i have short pieces throughout my head from breakage. If I see areas that have short pieces I make sure I concentrate on those areas with conditioners/protein treatments, etc. I have a short patch now. My hair has broken off well fell out in 2004, in which I had to shave the whole back off, in 2005 and 2006 in the same patch before I found the forum. I feel your pain.

 

[hopeful]

Sorry you are discouraged. Hang in there, okay? I don't really have any advice, just wanted to send you a (((hug))). Hope you get your hair back on track soon.

 

[env10us]

I know ladies....it's just been a rough month

But i honestly will say that my stylist will tell me what's wrong, usually fix it and we move on from there. i'm actually qute upset with him for NOT telling me, and I will be talking to him in the morning.

To loca-I don't believe my hair is overprocessed..can it be if I've never had a chemical service done to it?

To runaway-i'd never cut off my hair. as much as i hate it at times, i love it too much, lol. and i'd look really odd without it. and yeah i'm going through a lot, but i'm making it. without struggle there is no progress (thanks loca)

And i'm also mad that my biotin is what's causing my face to itch and break out like NEVER before...i knew i should've left these vitamins alone!!!!

 

[LaPaciencia]

Hey stay strong!!! DON'T BE DISCOURAGED!!! You'll be al'ight!!!
There are many questions to ask yourself...
Is there more shedding or breakage? If breakage, where along the hair shaft is the breakage occuring?
Is there by chance something causing friction against your hair? Flatiron temps (heat protectant)?
Are you wearing a hat during the day?
Are you wrapping your hair at night?
Moisture? Protein? Do you have a satin or silk pillow case?
Etc., etc...
I know there are tons of questions so..chill, watch Eve's Bayou. Sleep on the issue and in the morning re-evaluate your routine and your stylist too...hope this helps.

 

[env10us]

Hey stay strong!!! DON'T BE DISCOURAGED!!! You'll be al'ight!!!
There are many questions to ask yourself...
Where along the hair shaft is the breakage occuring?
Is there by chance something causing friction against your hair? Flatiron temps (heat protectant)?
Are you wearing a hat during the day?
Are you wrapping your hair at night?
Moisture? Protein? Do you have a satin or silk pillow case?
Etc., etc...
I know there are tons of questions so..chill, watch Eve's Bayou. Sleep on the issue and in the morning re-evaluate your routine and your stylist too...hope this helps.

The hair seems to be coming from mid shaft, but a few that fall are full strands. I always use a Heat protectant, so i don't think thats it. never wear a hat..can't find one thats not wool and I wrap my hair everyday, even when it's a fro. i use keracare to moisturize

 

[LaPaciencia]

The hair seems to be coming from mid shaft, but a few that fall are full strands. I always use a Heat protectant, so i don't think thats it. never wear a hat..can't find one thats not wool and I wrap my hair everyday, even when it's a fro. i use keracare to moisturize

How does your hair react to protein?

 

[env10us]

How does your hair react to protein?

i've noticed it helps, but only for the moment. my stylist noticed it too. i might try again this weekend

 

[LaPaciencia]

Cool, keep us posted !!!!

 

[locabouthair]

I know ladies....it's just been a rough month

But i honestly will say that my stylist will tell me what's wrong, usually fix it and we move on from there. i'm actually qute upset with him for NOT telling me, and I will be talking to him in the morning.

To loca-I don't believe my hair is overprocessed..can it be if I've never had a chemical service done to it?

To runaway-i'd never cut off my hair. as much as i hate it at times, i love it too much, lol. and i'd look really odd without it. and yeah i'm going through a lot, but i'm making it. without struggle there is no progress (thanks loca)

And i'm also mad that my biotin is what's causing my face to itch and break out like NEVER before...i knew i should've left these vitamins alone!!!!

oh sorry I thought you were relaxed. Don't fret girl. Your hair looks beautiful in your siggy. i wished my hair looked that nice and healthy.

if you are taking biotin you should drink lots of water. that can help with the breakouts.

 

[Glitter]

You know, I'm a student and I notice I always get breakage and shedding around exam times or when I'm feeling really unhappy with where my life is going. You say you have been really depressed this past month - perhaps this is part of the problem.

 

[SqrpioQutie]

ok, i'm confused... if you've never had a chemical process, what was the 3 week stretch about?

 

[Ms Lala]

ok, i'm confused... if you've never had a chemical process, what was the 3 week stretch about?

yeah I'm confused because I would give you different tips as a natural than if you're relaxed or colored.If you are natural and you are pressing often than can cause breakage. You might need a break from it.
Anyway don't give up. Do you think it could be stress related.

 

[ajoyfuljoy]

It took me a year to get my hair to the point where I considered it in really good shape.


A year!

Don't be discouraged. Just like it took your hair a long time to get in bad shape, it will take it a while to turn around.

Have you ever tried Aphogee treatments? I use to have horrible problems with breakage and after I started using Aphogee (every six weeks or so). Most of the breakage stopped.

You'll still have to deep condition at least once a week and make sure your hair doesn't get dry. But the Aphogee will strengthen the hair from the inside out.

I had to use the hard core treatments for like a year until my hair didn't need it anymore.

 

[ravenmerlita]

You know, I'm a student and I notice I always get breakage and shedding around exam times or when I'm feeling really unhappy with where my life is going. You say you have been really depressed this past month - perhaps this is part of the problem.

I think this may be part of the problem as well. Depression and stress can greatly affect all areas of your health and life -- including wreaking havoc on your hair.

I know you said your hair thrived under your stylist when you were home, but could the breaking be from the more frequent flat ironing done in the salon? My hair doesn't break immediately when I've ben flat ironing too much or without protection, usually I start to notice breakage a few weeks later.

Hope you feel better. Don't give up!

 

[clever]

I think this may be part of the problem as well. Depression and stress can greatly affect all areas of your health and life -- including wreaking havoc on your hair.

I know you said your hair thrived under your stylist when you were home, but could the breaking be from the more frequent flat ironing done in the salon? My hair doesn't break immediately when I've ben flat ironing too much or without protection, usually I start to notice breakage a few weeks later.

Hope you feel better. Don't give up!

Ain't that the truth!It looks fine after you flat iron and a few weeks later your trying to figure what happened.:burning:

I hope you feel better

 

[ricochet]

I just wanted to pop in and let you know that it's okay. We have all had some type of setback or ill feelings about our hair. Hang in there, this will pass.

 

[sonce]

Hey girl, no hair advice here, just encouragement. Hang in there. Difficult life moments can be so overwhelming but imagine, one day you will look back on this time, shake your full, long, thick head of hair and smile to yourself knowing you came through this period ok. Everything will be fine. Right now in my life, I can relate to how you feel but I just keep reminding myself that the morning does come after the night--it's how God created the world to be.

 

[env10us]

Thanks for the encouragement ladies...I'm gonna just work through it and hope and pray for the best!

What I meant by the stretch is me NOT flat ironing or pressing my hair...just wrapping it and pinning it up in the daytime. But I am colored (please grow out soon!!!), but those strands seem to stay! I've had the color since last Jan, with a touch up in June.

Thanks again for the advice!!!! This is why I Love you ladies!!! Like the big sisters I never had...that can teach me about more than guys, lol!!!!!

 

[pazyamor]

Me and you both! You're in college right? And you live in a dorm? It's the dreaded dorm curse: it's like, when I'm home, with the same haircare, my hair thrives and is beautiful. But when I get back to school? I have to try twice as hard to get the same results; I feel like crying sometimes!! But I know that it's only a matter of time before my hair is beautiful and swangin' (yes, I said swangin') and long to boot. So, stick in there, we'll make it one day.

 

[*Luscious*Locked*Doc]

Thanks ladies. I was thinking of trying something like MN, but I'm worried would I have to wash me hair everyday. my hair is sooooooooooo difficult to manage and it would be too much for me to do that.

I'm just so ready to cut it ALL off and start fresh!

And runaway, Eve's Bayou is really good. But i know my roomie is tired of me watching it..I've been hella depressed lately...

If you do decide to use MN you would not have to wash it out every day...many in the MN challenge or users thread just slap it in either every day or every other day and keep it moving until the next wash. I only wash my hair 2x a week and this is sufficient. Also less is more I use an 8 oz color applicator bottle to apply and this has eliminated an excess of oil/MN on my scalp. I'm sorry your hair is broken off in those two sections. . Maybe you can just baby those sections for now and keep them moisturized and they will grow back in no time. I'm also trying to get to SL in 08. Don't worry these setbacks happen to everyone - and eventually things will work out and you'll have a whole new head of hair to show for your dedication! Good luck and don't give up!

 

[amwcah]

that you are going through a difficult time right now but don't be discouraged. Remain prayerful and try to stay focused on your studies. In the meantime, this is and a big hug too!

 

[env10us]

Me and you both! You're in college right? And you live in a dorm? It's the dreaded dorm curse: it's like, when I'm home, with the same haircare, my hair thrives and is beautiful. But when I get back to school? I have to try twice as hard to get the same results; I feel like crying sometimes!! But I know that it's only a matter of time before my hair is beautiful and swangin' (yes, I said swangin') and long to boot. So, stick in there, we'll make it one day.

yes!!!!! this hard water is wreaking havoc on my hair and my skin!!!!!!!!!and i'm in it for the long haul!

to Luscious, yeah, i'm thinking of the MN. i just don't have the ingredients for the mix some of you ladies use (i'm stuck in a predominantly white town with a semi decent sally's) so i might just use it straight