I learned to do my hair when I was maybe 12-13. Somewhere around that time. I just got tired of people asking "your hair is so pretty, who did it?" and my answer would be "my grandmother". Not that I wasn't grateful, because when I took the reigns I realized why it always took 3+ hours to do. I just thought she was slow lol. My mother was always against me doing my own hair because she felt that my hair was all I had to make me look beautiful and if I messed that up I was done for...thanks for the vote of confidence mom.
I mostly did wash and go's (because around that time I had found Teri Laflesh so I did her method for a while) and bantu knots because that was the style my grandmother did in my hair but she called them china bumps. Detangling took a toll on my psyche because I felt that it wasn't supposed to take so long and fell subject to the "bad hair" stigma as I had been just introduced to this way of thinking when I moved to a different state.
I never had my hair pressed or any kind of heat styling till I was maybe 14. I really feel that since your daughter has yet to relax her hair, she should learn to manage her natural hair first. I'm not saying that she has to be hard core natural with the twist outs braid outs tea rinses, oil concoctions, yogurt, mayo, and what have you but you can't go wrong (typically) learning to accept what naturally grows from your head before you make the decision to alter it for the sole reason of being more manageable and not equating straight hair ha being better that natural hair. I feel she should hold out on the relaxer for a while longer until she can take care of her natural hair. Nothing wrong with getting it pressed every few weeks.
Yeah sure there were times when I looked homeless but it was worth it for the rest of the time when my hair was bomb. Through trial and error I've made it to a comfortable place in my hair journey and that is the one and only way: trial and error. Now my family is asking me, the littlest Huxtable, for recommendations (and to this day mom still flips if she notices I've trimmed my hair).
Hope I contributed something.