A Big Relaxer Decision Coming Up!!

[HairSupremacy]

Someone wrote an article on the reason to relax, and you know, this is a really good question. My mom put a relaxer in my hair when I was a little girl and a lot of my hair broke off. I have just been putting relaxers in my hair every since. This is all I know. I am currently 11 weeks post relaxer, and I want to relax at the 13 week mark, but now I am having second thoughts.

I was lying awake in bed this morning and was thinking about the chemistry behind the relaxing process. Protein bonds are broken, which results in straighter hair. That is why protein supplementation is such an essential necessity after the relaxer process, but is it that we use protein to nurse it back to the newgrowth stage and then start all over again?

A fellow by the name of Garret A. Morgan, rubbed a chemical off of his hand onto a wool cloth. The chemical then straightened out the wool cloth. A wool cloth? Then he tested the chemical on a dog, and the dog's curly hair came out straight. If you think about it, when this was tested on human hair, the results were not as expected. Negro hair is very fine and weak, and that is why our hair type is more susceptible to breakage.

I started thinking for reasons why I straightened my hair, and the only reasons I could come up with was to live up to society's standards, and being under the assumption that my hair does not grow. I wear my hair in a pony tail 95% of the time, or in the past I used to weave it away. I did however; wear my hair in high school a lot, but it never grew past shoulder length because of the abuse I have put it through to be accepted. I did not care much for my hair. I came to the point last year where I was getting tired of going through this same cycle of neglecting my hair.

I may be on the verge on transitioning, but I will make and post my decision at week 13 post. If I do transition, I would not do a BC. I would let the relaxer grow out. I just need some help in making my decision. I don't know if this sounds rational or not. Did some of you the ladies feel like this when you transitioned? I also want to hear from some relaxed ladies also. I know some relaxed ladies complain of breakage when going post relaxer too long.

 

[Ms. Feliz]

Honestly, I've thought about transitioning many times but every time I think of why I would want to transition I decide not to. Although I know that relaxing my hair isn't good for it, I also know that my only reason for having natural hair at this point would simply be for the curls, and I don't even know if i'll like my curl pattern if I do transition. I've also grown used to detangling my hair in a few seconds, and I know that it would take more for natural hair.

 

[melissa-bee]

I agree with the thing about using protein to nurse your hair back to health. As i see like 95% of naturals' hair do not even like protein. I'm transitioning because of a small range of reasons including breakage i've made up my mind and can't imagine going back. You will probably feel the same when you're ready to do so.

 

[HairSupremacy]

Bumping for more responses.

 

[MarieB]

This is exactly why I started using BKT. It strenghtens the hair, rather than weakening it, and I have managed to retain a lot more hair than I used to. I did a very mild texlax in October (I don't think it even took because it was old, mixed with oil, and I didn't leave it on for long),before that, March, and at this point I have no interest in relaxing again. BKT to me is worth the time and effort, and is a very effective transitioning tool because it does wear off over time, allowing your hair to grow without breakage, and letting you see your natural texture and decide if it's what you want. There are quite a few naturals who BKT and opt to straighten or wear their hair curly, also.

 

[CurlTalk]

For me, the decision to go natural had nothing to do with the chemical aspect of the process, nor health of hair/scalp. I had a really decent stylist, and I was pretty good with my hair practices.
Instead, my decision had to do with the fear that the people I'll meet in later life, my future husband, bosses, coworkers, etc. would not be seeing the real me if i continued to relax, but a straight-haired version unlike the me I was meant to be.
I never defined myself by my hair texture, and was convinced that I relaxed only for maintenance, so this fear took me by surprise. All of a sudden, I wanted to see 'me'.
All my life, as well, I was convinced that I could not maintain my natural hair, and relaxed for maintenance; as soon as I saw how easily even the most kinky-haired naturals maintain their hair, I was sold, and decided to go natural.
This was just my experience, however. The decision to go natural is not a light one, and should be a personal one. If you're still undecided about whether or not to relax at week 13, continue to stretch, and see what happens. Personally, I got to month 4 post, undecided as to whether I was stretching or transitioning, before I made up my mind that I was in deed transitioning.

 

[curlydrea]

My reasons to become natrual was to just accept my hair texture. as we all know hair (in real life) is a huge issue in the blkCommunity, it just is. I was raised not to like my hair, and never got a chance to know it. but when i turned 17 i decided (with the support of my natrual hair lovin SO) to transition... it didnt last long. only 3 months or so b4 i bc'd.

Now ive fallin loooove! Everybody may not feel the same or have the same reasons but this was mine.

On average being natrual is simple. It doesnt take me hours or even 30 min to detangle, just like 3-5 in the shower. It doesnt take me hours to flat iron, only about 30mins.

I believe everyone should give it a try B4 they knock it or assume. you can always relax again. My only regret is that i wasnt aware sooner

 

[HairSupremacy]

This is exactly why I started using BKT. It strenghtens the hair, rather than weakening it, and I have managed to retain a lot more hair than I used to. I did a very mild texlax in October (I don't think it even took because it was old, mixed with oil, and I didn't leave it on for long),before that, March, and at this point I have no interest in relaxing again. BKT to me is worth the time and effort, and is a very effective transitioning tool because it does wear off over time, allowing your hair to grow without breakage, and letting you see your natural texture and decide if it's what you want. There are quite a few naturals who BKT and opt to straighten or wear their hair curly, also.

BKT? I've read other posts where women on here talk about it, but I am not quite sure what it is or how the process works? Can this be done by me or would I need a professional? If someone could post a link of how the process is done, and how it works, that would be very helpful.

 

[SignatureBeauty]

I would like to know more on it as well!

 

[HairSupremacy]

My reasons to become natrual was to just accept my hair texture. as we all know hair (in real life) is a huge issue in the blkCommunity, it just is. I was raised not to like my hair, and never got a chance to know it. but when i turned 17 i decided (with the support of my natrual hair lovin SO) to transition... it didnt last long. only 3 months or so b4 i bc'd.

Now ive fallin loooove! Everybody may not feel the same or have the same reasons but this was mine.

On average being natrual is simple. It doesnt take me hours or even 30 min to detangle, just like 3-5 in the shower. It doesnt take me hours to flat iron, only about 30mins.

I believe everyone should give it a try B4 they knock it or assume. you can always relax again. My only regret is that i wasnt aware sooner

I think we all have that same upbringing where we are taught not to like our hair and that nappy is bad and straight is good. People of your own race would talk about you for not relaxing your hair. I got this especially when I was in high school over 10 years ago. I relaxed my hair to fit in.

Part of this upbringing is from my mom, who believes in the "Good Hair Gene," when we all know there is no such thing. Black people have been taught to hate their hair, and bleach their skin. I used to bleach my skin years ago, but I stopped doing it because it is just not natural.

People are so misinformed about their hair and the sales markets take advantage of that. There are still millions of black people who use grease on their hair as a moisturizer. These "black hair care products" that are sold in stores are really one of the main culprits in preventing us reaching better lengths. Good "black hair care products" are rare or found over the internet like a well kept secret. I am sort of venting a little. I am sorry, but the more I learn about my hair, the more I feel I bad for not knowing the extent of the abuse I put my hair through. I just feel like black hair care practices should not be a research project, but more like something that is common sense to us. Why is that? How could I have missed it all this time?

 

[HairSupremacy]

Bumping for more info about BKT.